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Saturday Morning Satan: Diablo III Gets A Cartoon!

Taste my blade. Indirectly.

Remember back when Diablo III was first announced and all those people panicked because they thought Blizzard’s angstiest Big Bad had gone all My Little Lord of the Damned on them? Well, they were right. Someone has drawn pictures of Diablo characters and made them move. All hope is lost. OK, OK, fine. Maybe this animated short wouldn’t quite be at home on, say, the Disney Channel. It’s a wee bit stabby. There are also cryptic mentions of traps being sprung and angels angering at each other angrily, but mostly, it’s an excuse for seven minutes of ludicrously high-budget demon decapitation, bifurcation, and probably some other “-cations” I don’t know about. Check out the full thing after the break.

So then, that was fun, wasn’t it? Yes, Torchlight II, your hand-drawn hack ‘n’ slashery is also quite handsome, but does it have a narrator who’s trying way too hard to be Sean Connery?

Admittedly, Blizzard seems pretty much incapable of distinguishing between melodrama and full-on camp these days, but I’m long past the point of getting bent out of shape about it. Diablo’s lore was never particularly gripping, so I doubt I’ll have any real qualms with whatever direction this newfound focus on story takes so long as it doesn’t get in the way of my incredibly violent safari through the natural habitat of the wild loot pinata. The game’s out in six days – as if you weren’t counting down the seconds.

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Nathan Grayson

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