Click To Behead: The Social Game Of Thrones

The Pete Campbell of Westeros

If it’s popular, it gets a tie-in social network game that’s launched on Facebook with a big old song’n’dance and then slumps into obscurity a few months later. EA have just this weekend taken the insidious Dragon Age Legends out the back of the sheds and put it out of its misery, but if you are still craving glacially slow, micro-transacted up the wazoo fantasy empire-building then perhaps the Facebook Game Of Thrones: Ascent will fill that bizarre void in your life. Of course, if it was truly faithful to the books/TV show, victory would stem from asking any relatives you have on Facebook to agree to the most unsavoury liasions with you. I would applaud such a design decision, and then start retching violently.

Here’s the blurb:

“In Game of Thrones Ascent players will lead the life of a noble during the time of upheaval as portrayed in the books and the series thus experiencing a new type of game that unites both story and strategy. Players will claim their birthright by choosing which of the great houses they’ll swear allegiance to, securing their holdings, developing their lands and personal reputation, and assigning sworn swords to quests–while forging alliances with new friends and much more!”

Click, wait, click, wait, click, wait, click, wait, click, wait, spend, spend, wait, spend, stop. No, of course I’m not pre-judging Game of Thrones: Ascent before I’ve seen even a screenshot of it. I’d never do something so narrow-minded. I was talking about narrow-boat holidays. Yes.

The developer of the game is Disruptor Beam, who appear to specialise in this sort of thing. The game will specifically be based upon HBO’s Game Of Thrones TV series rather than the books. That might mean more nudity. Or it might just mean occasional still photos of the cast during the tutorial.


  1. f1x says:

    As much as I enjoy Game of Thrones… (more the series than the books I must confess, after reading the books I cannot shake this sense that Martin is somehow trolling me)…I think its starting to be too much too everywhere

    PD: I’m certainly prejudging Game Of Thrones: Ascent before even seeing a screenshot of it.

    • Resonance says:

      I agree for the most part; having sped through the novels and kept up with the TV show [though Season 2 has been pretty dire] this mass influx of GoT related media is becoming tedious rather than engaging; primarily because the world of ASOIAF really isn’t that interesting [it’s pretty generic]…the characters maketh the appeal not the setting. Well that and the fact the vast majority of related media are pure cash-grabs attempting to utilize the appeal of the TV show.

      As for the game…sounds terrible, as with all official GoT games.

      • Network Crayon says:

        I dont think the setting is generic at all. it’s a microcosm of medival europe, painted with a few fantasy touches to enhance it. If it feels generic sometimes i think thats because it mirrors the real world rather than a gaudy fanasty one.
        I agree with you about the characters though, thats the obvious appeal of the story.

        I guess if people want to play a game version thats fine to, i just struggle to believe it’s made out of love of the story rather than love of cashing in on a vogue TV series.

        Still you never know…

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  2. Pathetic Phallacy says:

    Stop trying to make a game based on Game of Thrones when one already exists: Crusader Kings 2!

    • Kandon Arc says:

      Yep, the only GOT game I will play is the mod for CK2 when it comes out.

      • frightlever says:

        Is this happening? Oh. Hmm. Was gonna wait for expansions and DLC all to drop before getting it.

        I see there’s already a conversion for the original CK. Maybe I’ll dust that off.

        link to

    • ukpanik says:

      Currently playing Crusader Kings 2…I love it.
      Planing to have an entire court of dwarfs.

    • frenz0rz says:

      When I suddenly had the opportunity to appoint my youngest son – a dwarf – as chancellor of the Kingdom of Burgundy, I could not help but squee a small nerdly cry of delight.

      • ukpanik says:

        I’ve got a dwarf daughter and a hunchback one also ~_~ I think because I married my cousin. Scraping the bottom of the gene pool barrel.
        I’m grooming my dwarf daughter for a life of espionage. She will be my tiny spymaster. Hiding in small places, listening, watching & spooking children.

    • Konig says:

      Also of note, is a Game of Thrones mod for Mount & Blade: Warband, which could turn out quite well if they handle it right

  3. DeepQantas says:

    On the other hand, Crusader Kings 2 would probably pretty easily translate into an excellent browser game. Study the lineages at your own leisure, send marriage proposal and wait a day or two.

  4. SirKicksalot says:

    Just seeing that kid’s face rustles my jimmies. What a fantastic villain!

    • mlaskus says:

      Fantastic villain? I find him to be comically evil, which could be a good thing, mind you, if the tone of the whole thing was different.

      • Pathetic Phallacy says:

        His exaggerated petty behavior and malicious conduct is indicative of his age. He’s supposed to be over-the-top-evil. He’s a sociopathic inbred power-hungry child.

        • codename_bloodfist says:

          That’s still pretty poor characterisation though. He is entirely one-dimensional. Aside from his appearance, role and the fact that he’s a bad guy, can you think of a single trait describing this kid? Unforunately, the same applies to many other characters in the series, with a notable exception being most of the members of the Stark family, Tywin and Tyrion Lanister and what’s-her-face dragon lady.

          • iucounu says:

            Yeah, he’s a sadistic psychopath. He’s pretty one-note, but then some people *are* pretty one-note.

      • brooklyn67 says:

        In fairness to the series and the actor, having read all the books I can vouch for the fact you’re not missing anything that was in the books. He was a pretty two dimensional character in there as well. Even with all those pages, Martin’s obsessions with describing food, adding new characters with full lineages, and describing food leave some of his characters as little more than quick sketches.

    • westyfield says:

      Fun fact: Jack Gleeson is actually 20 years old.

      Bonus fun: Jack Gleeson was in Batman Begins.

      • WoundedBum says:

        I’m fairly sure in the first book he’s supposed to be 17, so he’s nearing that age now anyway.

        • gmcleod says:

          He’s 12 in the first book, 13 in the second. He’s intentionally portrayed as being younger and less mature than Robb, who is 15 in the first book, most likely to make the audience think that Robb makes a much better King.

          So yeah, psychopathic little shit.

    • Spinks says:

      If you can click to slap Joffrey, I’m in.

  5. pertusaria says:

    Thanks again for the humour on this site – talk of taking a game out the back and putting it out of its misery got a chuckle, even though it was typo’d. :-)

  6. The Smilingknight says:

    Stop worrying and watching that shit and watch my Extra Emotionally Engaging Reviews of the stupid show.

    Much higher quotient of fun and intelligence across the board.

    Four completely random EEEReviews can be seen here:

    link to

  7. liquidsoap89 says:

    He totally IS GOT’s version of Pete Campbell! I didn’t even think of that…

    GOD I HATE THAT GUY! AND that kid!

  8. fallingmagpie says:

    I would be watching this, but I want to read the books first. I’m not going to play the game, but not for the same reason.

    • Network Crayon says:

      I’d actually recommend watching the series first, the extra detail in the books makes the TV series feel super rushed. Which is a shame because it’s a good series and probably more entertaining without the pre-knowledge of whats gonna happen.

  9. iucounu says:

    Thing about GoT, though, it’s so far-fetched! Watching the TV series right now. Can you imagine if our leader were in thrall to some kind of sinister redheaded witch? link to

  10. Solrax says:

    Click to behead! What a great idea! I could totally see a golf-swing type control for beheading.
    “Ok, click to start the swing, don’t start the down swing too soon, click, ok strike click DAMN too late, the heads not off!”

  11. Rii says:

    I’m clicking but nothing’s happening.

  12. Vitruality says:

    Will it remain faithful to the books by having anything remotely interesting happen while you’re not logged in?

  13. adonf says:

    Pete Campbell kinda grew on me in the latest season. He’s still a little weasel (no offence to weasels reading this) but he’s a much deeper character than his counterpart in Westeros.

  14. Lowbrow says:

    ” and assigning sworn swords to quests”

    And this is the part where we shoe-horn generic fantasy tropes into a book about mocking them.

  15. Thunder13 says:

    Game Of Thrones Ascent
    Game Of Thrones Ascent is an upcoming social game inspired by Game of Thrones, the medieval fantasy
    television series. The game, which is being developed by Disrupt Beam with a license from HBO,
    casts players in a story-driven medieval world where they can expand their lands and grow reputation,
    forge tribes with friends, and perform quests.
    link to