Free The Meat Boy One! Ransoming Super Meat Boy Galaxy

The entire gaming world and its robo-dog is currently going from door-to-door and begging for cash, so a shaft of philanthrophic light amidst the Kickstarted darkness is a welcome one. We posted about Mario/McMillen & Refenes mash-up Super Meat Boy Galaxy last week, but it was unclear whether Aubrey Hesselgren would ever share more of his half-gag, half-tribute project with the world. Turns out, he will. BUT ON ONE CONDITION. That condition is cash. Of course it’s cash! This cash will not, however, go to the developer – it will go to The Samaritans. If SMBG is successfully ‘ransomed’ for £10,000, its prototype will be freed and released to the public.

Blood money, I call it! Blood money! And also a very smart idea.

As a reminder, here’s the video of that prototype:

You don’t want to play that? Seriously? What are you, a monster? Or worse: a boring person?

By his own admission, Hesselgren is unlikely to have the time/opportunity to turn this into a fully-fledged game sold for real Earth monies, and on top of that there are the ethical issues of borrowing/profiting from other folks’ games. So, he’s come up with an ingenious and cheerful solution – raise money for charity, give the prototype to those goodly folk who donate. In the event it doesn’t make the £10k ransom, he’ll find a way to secretly share the build with those who did donate.

Donations go to The Samaritans via JustGiving, and you can and should throw some money into the charity hat here. NOW.


  1. klingon13524 says:

    That’s… Rather genius on his part.

  2. Spoon Of Doom says:

    I never got into Super Meat Boy. I like the style and everything, but I could never bring myself to play it more than a couple of minutes.
    I think I’m getting old. I can’t really get much enjoyment out of 2D platformers anymore, much less put up with the frustration of the Nintendo Hard™ variety.

  3. Nathan_G says:

    This is such a swell idea, and Aubrey is a lovely man, so I hope people dig deep!!

    Heartwarming stuff!

  4. Deadly Habit says:

    Awesome idea!

  5. tobecooper says:

    Do your worst, Hesselgren! I ain’t payin’ for that boy!

    • tobecooper says:

      But you ain’t even takin’. Damn it!

    • HilariousCow says:

      /me cuts off own toe. Puts it in an envelope with a note reading “DON’T FUCK WITH ME.”

      • Bhazor says:

        This is your ransom. Ten thousand in unmarked bills, just like you wanted. But this is as close as you’ll ever get to it. You’ll never see one dollar of this money, because no ransom will ever be paid for Meatboy Galaxy. Not one dime, not one penny. Instead, I’m offering this money as a reward on your head. Dead or alive, it doesn’t matter. So congratulations, you’ve just become a ten thousand dollar lottery ticket… except the odds are much, much better. Do you know anyone that wouldn’t turn you in for ten thousand dollars? I don’t think you do. I doubt it. So wherever you go and whatever you do, this money will be tracking you down for all time. And to ensure that it does, to keep interest alive, I’m running a full-page ad in every major newspaper every Sunday… for as long as it takes. But… and this is your last chance… you return my meaty, alive, uninjured, I’ll withdraw the bounty. With any luck you can simply disappear. Understand… you will never see this money. Not one dollar. So you still have a chance to do the right thing. If you don’t, well, then, God be with you, because nobody else on this Earth will be.

  6. dommafia says:

    A ransom with a Brit accent??? I CANT SAY NOOOOOOO

  7. Bhazor says:

    Aubrey’s a guys name? Hmm… well some guys getting let down on saturday then.

    • Haplo says:

      I’ve never heard Aubrey used as a girl’s name.

      Are you sure you don’t mean Audrey?

  8. Vandelay says:

    That is rather excellent and I really enjoyed Meat Boy the first (and Mario Galaxy.) Will definitely be pledging and I haven’t even watched the video yet.

  9. Citrus says:

    Like everyone else here, I won’t donate anything. But I am pretending to support this noble cause and definitely donate a thousand doobers by writing this comment talking about its glorious creator. I feel so in-touch with the hip and happening crowd already.

  10. kalirion says:

    Does this guy have Team Meat’s permission to make money off their IP?

    Edit: Or to make money for charities off their IP as the case might be.

    • Citrus says:

      I don’t know. But I am going to say yes, he does. Unless he doesn’t, in that case, he doesn’t.

      Thank you for your concern, average citizen.

      • Tei says:

        He is not a citizen, he is a dog. And you are a penguin. You are not tricking anyone.

    • HilariousCow says:

      From Tommy? Yeah, come to think of it, not from anyone else.

      Oh crap oh crap oh crap.


    • Yglorba says:

      Generally, people who make letters using taped-together bits of newspapers demanding money in exchange for releasing someone alive don’t care about “permission.”

  11. Xzi says:

    The fact that this is not being made into a full game just proves that there truly is no god. That looks infinitely more fun than Mario Galaxy could have ever hoped to be. Especially if you imagine those 3D levels designed with spinning sawblades and fans and everything else that made SMB so challenging and fun.

    3D wallhopping = awesome.