Top Shelf: Drunken Robot Pornography Alpha Keys

The fine folks at DejobAaaaaAAaaaAAAaaAAAAaAAAAAn wish to invite you to peruse their Drunken Robot Pornography. They’ll even let you play with it if you sign up for the alpha. The mailing list would only be used to send out a Steam key for DRP’s alpha, discount codes and other such offers. No news/spam will be sent, they assure me, but there are thousands of alpha keys waiting to wing their way to RPS readers right now. The game allows players to construct arenas and and titanic robots, which then wage war on Boston from above and can only be stopped by a chap or chapess with a jetpack and a gun. The catchy intro explains all.

OK, maybe that didn’t quite explain everything but it certainly cheered me up on this cold, shiversome Friday. The cheeky chap below has something for you though.

“Tush! If it’s alpha footage you’re after, my old shiner, then you’ve come to the right place.”

I’ve already got a code because I’m a Very Important Internet Person. If you’d like to join me in the VIIP room, where lasers do battle with titanium titans, follow this link. I haven’t actually had time to play yet but I’m giddily reminded of Unreal Tournament’s DM-Morpheus, drifting between skyscrapers, sniping and instagibbing. I plan to recreate it as closely as possible.


  1. Soulstrider says:

    Oh my, robots and pornography, two of my favorite things.

  2. Quasar says:

    Yay! I do love the Dejobaan style of madness.

  3. waaaaaaaals says:

    I’ve been in the alpha since last year and it’s shaping up really well.

    Dejobaan seem to be the only company that wants to make this style of FPS rather than a gritty military shooter complete with ironsights.

    • Squirrelfanatic says:

      Them and Valve.

    • MrUnimport says:

      If your vision for the game industry includes a top hat, mustache, and monocle in every game, then I want no part of it, you hear me?

  4. Meat Circus says:

    Oh my god! Boston! What a shame.

  5. Chizu says:

    Looks neat~
    I coulda sworn I was already signed up to some kinda fanclub from them, but thinking about it, Ive not had any news from them in ages. so, signed up again to be sure :v
    Already got all their other games.
    Would like a key~

    • Gnoupi says:

      Same impression for me, quite sure I already subscribed, but never saw a thing.

      • rorodejobaan says:

        Folks, some of you may have signed up to our old fan-club and are wondering where your keys are, they are coming! We had a lot of people on that list and not enough keys but that problem is solved so all registered Dejobaan fans ever will get keys in days, not weeks. If you are not sure about registering, simply do it again and problem solved.

        CAVEAT: If you joined the list at PAX EAST 2012, the computer ate your email addresses and we were unable to get them back so please sign up again…we burned that computer.

        • LeeTheAgent says:

          Sweet! I too joined a long time ago, and haven’t heard anything in a long time *cough* Drop That Beat Like an Ugly Baby *cough*. I can’t wait to try this out!

  6. Totally heterosexual says:

    Sounds like my kind of a game.

  7. Ravenholme says:

    I love these guys – Utterly mad, but in a such a deranged and fun way

  8. Low Life says:

    That bloody song. It’s going to take weeks to get it out of my head.

    (Message edited for a more British expression)

  9. Bassem says:

    I love Dejobaan. And I love them even more ever since I asked them where I could buy one of their discontinued games and they gave me a copy. Actually DRP seems like an evolution of that game, though I prefer the original.

    I do wish the HUD wouldn’t be so ugly though.

    • waaaaaaaals says:

      Actually DRP has an Inago mode that you can set in the arena editor.

    • dejobaan says:

      We’re having the fantastique artist who’s on Monster Loves You! come in on the UI. He’s pretty good with monsters, but his real love is robots, so this should work out well.

      Or terribly.

  10. Ross Angus says:

    Is this the Bastion sequel?

  11. Catweasel says:

    Is the brony junk in the video necessary?

    • dejobaan says:

      My lead tech is a Brony. I can’t stop him. But in the actual game, that’s a jellyfish.

      • Famout says:

        It fits oddly well with the rest of the insane intro. Besides in a game called Drunken Robot Pornography I would worry about more misunderstandings then just a pony :p

  12. rorodejobaan says:

    Also many many thanks to mr. Smith for telling the world about this, we are excited to have people play and tell us what they think.

  13. wu wei says:

    Oh hooray, another Dejobaan game that’ll see release before they get around to finishing 1..2..3..Kick It!, which I paid for 18 months ago.

    Why is it that when Hammerpoint lie on the Steam store page for The Day Z it’s an outrage, but Dejobaan get a free pass on a game they’ve effectively given up on, despite taking money for it, and which is still being advertised even now with images from a build that isn’t even the base of the game anymore? Why was I charged $10 to participate in what I thought was pre-release but is now back to (pre)alpha when they’re handing out alpha access to DRP for free?

    • Spider Jerusalem says:

      yes i was just thinking about that. i’m in the same boat, but i’m choosing to look at it like a donation to the people who make interesting shit.

      • wu wei says:

        Well, it’s killed any interest I have in supporting them any longer. Retail isn’t charity, and if they’re unable to live up to one set of promises, why should I expect anything else from them to ever do so?

        Seriously, how damn hard is it to update the Steam page?

    • waaaaaaaals says:

      How exactly have you come to the conclusion that they’ve given up on it if you’ve noticed the screenshots are from the version of the game before the engine update?

      It’s not even been a month since their last update to kick it, they’re obviously still working on it alongside their other games.

      • wu wei says:

        You’re conflating several issues here, just to be pissy and defensive.

        The screenshots advertising 1…2…3…Kick It! don’t resemble the new version in any way, and haven’t _for some time_, which is really crappy behaviour, if not outright deceptive. The game play focus is different. They’re now “looking for an artist” to work with, so it’ll inevitably look different. They’ve farmed out portion of the new engine to an external source, and hired two new developers to work on it instead, so it’s not even really the same people making the game. Starting (and completing!) other games while I wait for them to get around to remembering to finish off Kick It! is what makes me feel like they’ve lost interest.

        Honestly, when they had the product up for sale, I expected that they’d resolved the _fundamental tech_ that it was based on – the music integration – and not that I was funding a learning experience for them.

        And “not even a month” is completely disingenuous when it’s been 18 months since it was originally released, with no updates in that time. until just prior to Xmas last year. Yes, they started work on a new engine, but they also decided to refocus the game. At that point, it’s something fundamentally different to what I paid for, and I should have the option to decide again whether I want the new product or not. Instead I get defensive fanboys saying crap like I should be grateful that I’m getting the “new version” for “free”.

        • trjp says:

          You’ve never created a thing in your life have you? If you had, you’d understand, but clearly you don’t.

          What Dejobaan did (and I suspect they may regret now) is bringing people into the development process BEFORE they themselves were sure what the game was going to be – that makes the job harder because you can’t just say “Well that didn’t work – bin it” – people have invested money (which is refundable) and time/effort (which is not).

          To their eternal credit they continue to work at it – but if you created stuff instead of just consuming it you’d understand that it’s often fucking hard to actually make something thats ‘just right’.

          123 could have been signed-off as done eons ago – it wouldn’t have set anything on fire but there are developers who release far less finished games and get considerable praise for doing it (Blendo leap to mind – similar style but a habit of releasing games which actually about 60% done at best).

          I threw coins into the 123 hat because I like to support their style of development and I love the way Dejobaan do their stuff – I love that they keep in touch with their customers (see above) – I love that they take feedback and make massive PNGs out of it – I can’t wait for DRP

          You appear to be a typically entitlement-driven Internet grumbler who believes that once they’ve “paid” for something, they should get Claridges-level service from thereon-in – the chip on your shoulder is blocking the sun, dude.

          • wu wei says:

            Actually, I’m a programmer, and if I ever pulled this crap with paying clients, they’d sue me, so STFU.

    • dejobaan says:

      We’re actually developing both games in parallel now. It took us a bit, but we have two full-time devs and two part-timers working on it. I understand why you’re miffed at us; we’re going to keep hacking away at the game until it’s as fantastic as I think it could be. Until then, there isn’t anything I expect to be able to say to make you un-miffed, so we’ll (deservedly) take our licks.

      • wu wei says:

        No, you could say, “Would you like a refund?” That’s all it would take.

        I’d like to believe you’re going to come through on your promises, I really would, because I’d love to be able to buy DRP. But you’ve promised a lot of things to deflect criticism of the delays – like more regular updates on progress during 2012, which tapered off around May – and said things like “the game’s been something I’m personally struggling with”, which didn’t fill me with any real confidence that you had any idea of what you are trying to deliver.

        The Steam page still says “Dejobaan will continue to polish the game — with your feedback — ’till it’s as smooth and silky as an ugly baby’s bottom for launch in 2012.” Prototyping isn’t polishing. Starting from scratch most definitely isn’t. Asking people what’s fun and what they’d like to see included isn’t either. Title the thing “Design A Game With Dejobaan” and you’d be a lot closer to the truth, you’d keep your fans happy because they’re involved, and you wouldn’t lose customers who thought you knew what you were doing.

        • Famout says:

          Harsh much? Not saying your points are wrong, but give them a break for replying at least. Most indie devs tend to not give the slightest time of day to a negative comment, let alone from someone who attacks them in a rather aggressive way.

          Personally, I think mistakes where made, but they show signs of trying to own up to them which is more then most companies, besides even a good restaurant can make a bad $10 meal, and none of them can improve it over time :p

  14. PopeRatzo says:

    There’s a company that has done its market research. “Put the word “pornography” in the title of the computer game, and just back up the Brinks truck”.

    • dejobaan says:

      At PAX Prime, a family actually came up to us to ask whether the college-bound son should go into game development. The last question the mother asked was a slightly concerned, “So… Is this game about pornography?”

      It is!

      • ShineyBlueShoes says:

        Did you explain to her that once on the internet everything is instantly pornography?

  15. caddyB says:

    Definitely buying this. It’s everything I dream when I go to bed early in the morning.

  16. nuhasifa says:

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  17. LTK says:

    Forget about the game, I want more of this music!