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The RPS Bargain Bucket: Love Conquers All

Lewie is away but every digital distributor is trying seduce you on this annual arrow weekend so he has deputised me, Tony, to be your guide. Take my hand and we’ll dodge overpriced arrows like raindrops. Should you want to know where the deals hide during the week, go to for regular updates across all platforms.
Indie Royale Valentine’s Bundle £3.85/€4.44/$5.93 minimum at time of writing but it will fluctuate over time as detailed here.
I’m struggling to see what these games have to do with Valentine’s Day but it’s quite a good bundle. Serious Sam 3 is a heartwarming story of a large man shooting at shouting things until they stop shouting, Shad’O has a small boy exploring his fogged mind through…tower defence, Oozi is a traditional 2D platformer with traditional 2D platforms, Doc Clock is mostly about building ludicrous vehicles from household items and crashing them into things, Lunnye Devitsy 2013 is a seemingly peaceful exploration puzzle platformer with a little alien who falls off the moon and Wake is an altogether more intense affair centering on an engineer escaping a sinking ship. You know, Valentine’s Day stuff.

Hotline Miami, Borderlands, Painkiller Hell and Damnation, Bioshock 2, Alan Wake American Nightmare, Mafia II, Super Meat Boy, FEAR 3, Hell Yeah Wrath of the Dead Rabbit and Lucius two for £8/€10/£12 or £38/€48/$58 for everything
You all already own Hotline Miami and Super Meat Boy so I’m not going to tell you to buy Hotline Miami and Super Meat Boy together for £8. I’m not going to talk about how the deliriously pulsingly violent Hotline Miami and the mechanically tight and artistically personal Super Meat Boy both push you into a zen state of dying, restarting and eventually perfecting ever more demanding challenges until you feel both one with the game and slightly worried by feeling one with the game, because you already own Hotline Miami and Super Meat Boy. I will instead say that this deal includes a variety of games that – while not as good as Hotline Miami and Super Meat Boy – are well worth two for £8/€10/£12 or £38/€48/$58 for the lot.

Max Payne 3 Complete Pack GMG20-P4DLK-FKYRS £9/€12/$14 Redeems on Steam
Jumping sideways looks uncomfortable, especially in slow motion. In Max Payne 3, Mr Max Payne 3’s life of jumping sideways in slow motion has finally caught up with him and his addiction has ruined his life. He must redeem himself by doing only as he can: jumping sideways in slow motion. If you need help with jumping sideways in slow motion, seek professional help or cover mechanics.

Jim’s words on the game sum it up nicely:

I can’t quite identify what’s missing. And I am not sure it’ll matter, because the production is so lavish. The gilded hand of Rockstar is visible in almost everything. The barrelling back and forth between corrupt, glitzy high society and grimy, glittery low-life criminality. The cutscenes that ache to be true cinema, the humour in the media-baiting ultraviolence. Of course it lacks the trademark open-worldiness of their original games. There’s the occasional open area to run around in, but this is a firmly story-driven conveyor belt of gun-action. But we shouldn’t expect anything else from this gangster gun-ballet sequel. Everything in the single-player part of the game is Payne through the filter of Rockstar: Gritty, funny, horrible.

This edition comes with all the multiplayer DLC including a slow motion trip down a bullet hole-ridden memory lane and (disquietingly) a cemetery. You can get this without all the DLC for £6.80/€8.16/$10.88 if you don’t give an ejecting cartridge about multiplayer or you can buy just the DLC for £5.44/€8.16/$8.16. Be quick, this deal is only until 5pm GMT Saturday.

GOG RPG Weekend
If fantasy is how you like to RP your Gs, GOG has approximately 10 million hours of game on sale for you. Highlights of the bunch are the Enhanced Editions of Witcher and Witcher 2, Torchlight and the recently newly-suffixed Divinity 2: Developer’s Cut but based on Adam’s recommendation of Geneforge 1-5, I’ll be giving them a go too.

Deal of the week:
Steam for Linux Celebration Sale
Straighten your hats and throw open your arms because for Valentine’s Day this year, Steam brought down the barriers allowed us to play together with our Linux buddies. To welcome the newly behatted penguins to Steam, Valve have put on quite a ridiculous sale for PC, Mac and Linux users alike.

There are far too many to list here but I would suggest trying Eversion – a nightmare hidden behind a sweet smile, Amnesia: The Dark Descent – a nightmare hidden behind another nightmare and Bastion, which isn’t hiding behind anything else but does put a voice in your head. Oh and somewhere Lewie is telling me to compel you to buy FTL so do that and live out your space captain fantasies (warning: you are not a good space captain, you will cause everyone to die).

Go hug a penguin.

Also of note:
Castle Crashers £4.99/€5.99/$7.49 four-pack: £14.98/€17.98/$22.48
Torchlight 2 £7.49/€9.49/$9.99 four-pack: £22.49/€28.49/$29.99
Ace of Spaces £3.49/€3.99/$4.99 four-pack £10.49/€11.99/$14.99
Guns of Icarus Online £2.72/€4.08/$5.44 using code: GMG20-P4DLK-FKYRS Expires 5pm GMT Saturday. Redeems on Steam.
Chivalry: Medieval Warfare
£6.20/€7.80/$10 using code: GMG20-P4DLK-FKYRS Expires 5pm GMT Saturday. Redeems on Steam.
Indie Gala Subversion City Generator, Voxel Destruction, 7.62MM, Talisman Prologue Pay what you want or $5.68 at time of writing to add Multiwinia, DEFCON, Uplink, Hearts of Iron III and Demigod
Groupees Be Mine Anniversary Bundle $1 for Eschalon Book II, iBomber Defense Pacific, Livalink, Party of Sin, Major Mayhem and Dungeons: The Dark Lord or $5+ to add Men of War: Assault Squad, Two Worlds II, Enda & Harvey: Harvey’s New Eyes and Planets Under Attack

Go to for all your cheap game needs or if you just miss Lewie. He loves you.

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The all-seeing eye of Rock, Paper, Shotgun, the voice of many-as-one.

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