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Riot Act: League Of Legends Banhammer Applied

You're toxic I'm slipping under

I’m addicted to you, but you know that you’re toxic. And I love what you do, but you know that you’re toxic, said a woman, once, to me. She was Britney Spears, yes, although you know she looks a lot like Katarina in League of Legends in the Toxic video so maybe she was just predicting an awful lot of things that were going to go on in the future. Such as a bunch of absolute knobbers acting like knobs in League of Legends. Britney Spears has SPOKEN.

According to a pleasingly transparent post on the League of Legends forums today, Good Game University (GGU) General Manager Sam “Hexo” Bouchard has been given an official warning about his terrible behaviour. His harassment rating, according to the Senior eSports Manager at Riot, “is currently the worst of all LCS North American managers and players (including both starters and reserve players)”. It transpires that there is “strong circumstantial evidence that Hexo has engaged in DoS activity against one or more LoL players” resulting in being given “a first and final warning regarding the issuance of threats of DoS attacks or the actual launching of DoS attacks”. LoL pro player Hexo was caught posting a message in all-chat implying that he was attempting to determine the IP address of fellow player Robert “RobertXLee” Lee. See “/IP_Find_ROBERTxREE” in all chat:

Mean girls

A team mate of Hexo’s messaged ‘Hit it’ (very Britneyesque), and shortly after RobertXLee lost his connection, giving him a major disadvantage to his play when he reconnected.

Riot goes on to say of Hexo, “No other North American pro player or manager has a higher harassment score.” Sounds like he’s a fun guy to play against. If Hexo pisses anyone off further, he will receive a permanent account ban, amongst other, slightly more slappy-wristy stuff, and the shame of having violated The Summoner’s Code. You can read all about this case here.

Whilst other sports have a distinct no-doping policy, Riot has quite a strict no dickbag policy, though if people were doping the equivalent of LoL players smack talking we’d probably have a lot of comatose athletes on our hands. To that end, more rulings have been made on the case of something called “Elo-Boosting”. This is sort of like pumping your veins full of points instead of shark testosterone in order to make you perform better. Riot reports, “seven LCS North American pro players (plus one team coach) have been engaged in Elo-boosting”, where players use client accounts to artificially raise the client’s Elo rating. Sadly, the side effect of that is not tiny balls, but 14-day suspensions of their accounts, effective immediately, and all Season Two rewards revoked. The players/coach involved were:

Brandon “Dontmashme” Phan
Zaqueri “Aphromoo” Black
Samuel “Chuuper” Chu
William “Meteos” Hartman
ChengLong “NyJacky” Wang
Keith “Phranq” Hunter
Kennen “Rhux” Santos
Jake “Xmithie” Puchero


They are hustlers, they are no good at all, but I’m in love with them et cetera. RPS, your number one site for Britney Spears-related League of Legends posts.

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Cara Ellison


Senior Scottish Correspondent, often known as the Notorious C A E, though mostly by her mum

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