I can’t confess to having played much Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 (I’m all Call-of-Duty-ed out, although I actually enjoyed BLOPS 1 well enough), but I have to applaud it for occasionally going a bit off the script. Case in point: while the main story was, of course, mostly a near-future/past military techno-stravasplosion, upcoming DLC Mob of the Dead is, well, exactly what it sounds like. The co-op campaign stars four old-timey mobsters attempting to break out of Alcatraz and also there are zombies for some reason. And naturally, there’s heaps of Hollywood voice talent involved because Call of Duty. Sure, Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon (and maybe even Assassin’s Creed III: WASHINGFACE) probably has it beat for sheer zaniness, but I certainly can’t knock Treyarch for reining in its horse-based warcrimes for a bit of the good old-fashioned organized kind. Hilariously elaborate trailer after the break.
This one will apparently have dialogue beyond “RELOADING GET DOWN COVER ME NO YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO CLIMB THAT LADDER YET, SOLDIER RAH RAH RAH BARK MOO MEOW WOOF,” so Activision’s enlisting the vocal stylings of Ray Liotta, Michael Madsen, Chazz Palminteri, and Joe Pantoliano. You might recognize them from every semi-recent crime-related piece of media ever, including Godfellas, Reservoir Dogs, The Usual Suspects, and The Sopranos. I imagine, however, that Ray Liotta’s guest appearance on Phineas and Ferb is what really sold Acti on the idea.
But you probably want to know more. Tons more. Heaps more. Everything. Well, here is an incredibly brief synopsis.
“Anchoring the Uprising map pack is Mob of the Dead, Treyarch’s most terrifying Zombies experience to date. Top Hollywood talent rounds out a cast of four Prohibition-era gangsters – each with a unique set of skills – that are forced to fend off hordes of the undead while imprisoned on San Francisco’s notorious Alcatraz Island. While guard towers and new weapons offer tactical advantages, survival offers an unprecedented new challenge for these four lost souls.”
Sounds like Left 4 Dead: The Mafia Expansion, which is a thing I now desperately wish were real. Still though, this is certainly something, so hopefully it manages to live up to its concept’s oodles of promise. As for when you’ll get to play it, probably check back in about a month. I say “probably,” because Microsoft has one of its infamous exclusivity windows starting next week, and Activision doesn’t like to tell the un-Xbox-ed masses exactly when DLC will be heading elsewhere. Based on history, however, a month’s a pretty safe bet, so probably prep your Prohibition-appropriate snazzy hats and poofy pants for around then. Unless, of course, you always play games dressed that way, as every member of the RPS hivemind does. Except without the pants.