It’s No Blood Dragon, But: BLOPS 2 Adds Mobster Zombies

Sound card: 'Kabangboom.'

I can’t confess to having played much Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 (I’m all Call-of-Duty-ed out, although I actually enjoyed BLOPS 1 well enough), but I have to applaud it for occasionally going a bit off the script. Case in point: while the main story was, of course, mostly a near-future/past military techno-stravasplosion, upcoming DLC Mob of the Dead is, well, exactly what it sounds like. The co-op campaign stars four old-timey mobsters attempting to break out of Alcatraz and also there are zombies for some reason. And naturally, there’s heaps of Hollywood voice talent involved because Call of Duty. Sure, Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon (and maybe even Assassin’s Creed III: WASHINGFACE) probably has it beat for sheer zaniness, but I certainly can’t knock Treyarch for reining in its horse-based warcrimes for a bit of the good old-fashioned organized kind. Hilariously elaborate trailer after the break.

This one will apparently have dialogue beyond “RELOADING GET DOWN COVER ME NO YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO CLIMB THAT LADDER YET, SOLDIER RAH RAH RAH BARK MOO MEOW WOOF,” so Activision’s enlisting the vocal stylings of Ray Liotta, Michael Madsen, Chazz Palminteri, and Joe Pantoliano. You might recognize them from every semi-recent crime-related piece of media ever, including Godfellas, Reservoir Dogs, The Usual Suspects, and The Sopranos. I imagine, however, that Ray Liotta’s guest appearance on Phineas and Ferb is what really sold Acti on the idea.

But you probably want to know more. Tons more. Heaps more. Everything. Well, here is an incredibly brief synopsis.

“Anchoring the Uprising map pack is Mob of the Dead, Treyarch’s most terrifying Zombies experience to date. Top Hollywood talent rounds out a cast of four Prohibition-era gangsters – each with a unique set of skills – that are forced to fend off hordes of the undead while imprisoned on San Francisco’s notorious Alcatraz Island. While guard towers and new weapons offer tactical advantages, survival offers an unprecedented new challenge for these four lost souls.”

Sounds like Left 4 Dead: The Mafia Expansion, which is a thing I now desperately wish were real. Still though, this is certainly something, so hopefully it manages to live up to its concept’s oodles of promise. As for when you’ll get to play it, probably check back in about a month. I say “probably,” because Microsoft has one of its infamous exclusivity windows starting next week, and Activision doesn’t like to tell the un-Xbox-ed masses exactly when DLC will be heading elsewhere. Based on history, however, a month’s a pretty safe bet, so probably prep your Prohibition-appropriate snazzy hats and poofy pants for around then. Unless, of course, you always play games dressed that way, as every member of the RPS hivemind does. Except without the pants.


  1. Guvornator says:

    All I can say from that screen-shot is it’s good to see mid-90s Ray Liotta still getting work…

  2. Gap Gen says:

    Is it a sign that I’m getting old that I find taking an interesting setting and adding zombies like taking a birthday cake and adding dog turd? Granted, I’m not Call of Duty’s target audience any more. Eh, I’ll just go wave my walking stick at The Youth.

    • Jams O'Donnell says:

      They should mix up the horror monsters a bit. Zombies are bloody everywhere, as we all know. Show vampires or werewolves a bit of love.

      • Nick says:

        Or do a Zombies Ate My Neighbours approach and throw literally everything in, from giant babies to chainsaw killers.

      • Anthile says:

        Coming soon to a digital distribution platform near you:
        Chubacapra Cowboys
        Bigfoot Lawyers
        Werewolf Chefs
        Vampire Astronauts

      • Gap Gen says:

        Ray Liotta is dating Robert Pattison, who is a vampire, but they refuse to have sex, because something something. And the werewolf dude is jealous. I think?

      • Tyrone Slothrop. says:

        Werewolves and vampires are just as over-saturated, can’t we see the return of the honest, hard-working, god-fearing mutant? They can shamble or they can rupture their own torso in an explosion of neon-tentacles whilst spores shoot from their ocular cavities as their toxic-quill covered hands distend towards you. Just consider that range, one simply doesn’t know what to expect with mutants!

  3. Blue_Lemming says:

    This answers my question, when will zombies stop being used as the stock mass enemy for slaughter, the answer appears to be never.

    Awaiting the additional Joe Pesci DLC..

    • davorschwarz says:

      Just wait for the new age thinking on vegan movement to take over and hordes of zombies to get replaced by livestock

    • Kollega says:

      You can kill zombies without guilt, they don’t use guns and come in large numbers. Like it or not, they’re pretty much perfect cannon fodder for a four-man squad to slaughter mercilessly. Robots would be too tough to destroy, vampires and werewolves don’t come in massed crowds, and turning regular humans into faceless evil masses is less ethical than using mindless zombies… the only alternative i can see are some kind of aliens.

      • mseifullah says:

        For what it’s worth, I started working on (but never came close to finishing) a Left 4 Dead campaign that got rid of the zombies and replaced them with ant lions, and it took place in City 17.

    • Ringwraith says:

      Although it is hardly a new thing for them, so it is just continuing their trend of silly zombie modes.

  4. Cross says:

    I can’t even tell if that screenshot has been grayscaled in Photoshop, or if that’s just how the game looks. COLOUR AND MOVEMENT, YOU IDIOTS! Look at Bioshock Infinite!

    • distantlurker says:

      It’s Alcatraz Cross, not bloomin’ Disney Land /wink
      (also you’re answer’s in the trailer btw /shhh don’t tell)

    • Gap Gen says:

      Bioshock Infinite’s enemies are wonderful. More to the point, there’s a reason behind the naked brutality, rather than the casual xenophobia of the developers.

  5. GernauMorat says:

    Quick make it more generic!

    • Bhazor says:

      its concept’s oodles of promise

      I’m forced to assume that was sarcastic. Surely expectations aren’t so low that simply changing the voices in a bland shooting gallery is worthy of excitement.

  6. zeroskill says:

    How do they always come up with these ideas? Brilliant!

  7. DickSocrates says:

    No one tell Ray Liotta they stole his face.

  8. Zogtee says:

    “…they used to call it… EVIL ISLAND, and we were about to find out why”.

    Brilliant writing there. People actually get paid for this?

    • Geen says:

      Hey, I mean, look at Stephanie Myer or Matt Ward. It’s only shit instead of steaming shit.