What The Cthuck? It R’Lyeh Is A Magrunner Trailer

‘A Bit Portalish’ is a genre that I have in my head. It’s not brimming with games, but there are a few interesting ones in there nonetheless. The most interesting of all is Magrunner: Dark Pulse, a game that ran the gamut of crowd-funding acceptance or rejection and came out with a pile of money. How did it part people from their money? By taking the strange route of being ‘A Bit Lovecraftian’. Madness follows hither.

It feels like a cut and paste accident in a game developer design document: it starts as a fairly normal puzzle game, where you’re part of a lab experiment testing out a magnetic glove’s capabilities. The glove charges up positive and negative states, that you use to fling cubes, open doors, etc. Puzzles, eh? We know how they work.

But the greater mystery of magnets and their inner workings, as posited by Nobel Prize winning rapfessors Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope, leads to tentacley intrusions into the surprisingly crisp and clean testing environments. Having played the game a little of it elsewhere , I can tell you it’s pretty neat, and they get a lot out of the polarity switching mechanics. And there is also a robot puppy.

It’s out “after twenty-two years of nightmare and terror”, which at least means the upcoming RPS interview with developers 3AM Games will be before that.


  1. ucfalumknight says:

    Those silly cultists had it wrong all the time. Instead of all that silly chanting, they should have been collecting magnets!

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  2. Brun says:

    greater mystery of magnets and their inner workings

    Mystery? Nonsense! Everyone knows that magnets work because they are mined from the ground, and thus have bits of gravity trapped inside.

    • Lord Custard Smingleigh says:

      Balderdash, I say!

      Magnets cause strong currents in the aetheric fluid by a process known as “aetheric agitation”. That explains how they can both attract and repel things. Magnetic objects and some metals have a presence in the aetheric realm and so they affect and are affected by the aetheric currents. In a similar way, electromomagnetism is nothing more than the aetheric shadow of an electromomatic current inducing an aetheric current.

      It was upon this thesis (and my groundbreaking experiments to deduce the recipe for the perfect pavlova) I was admitted to the Royal Society of Natural Histrionics, so I assure you I know what I’m talking about.

      • JackShandy says:

        Nonsense, both of you are spreading misinformation about a very simple process. The twin magnet demons housed in every magnet fall madly in love with or form instant, deep hatred for all other magnet demons they see, and as such make every effort to move towards or away from them. There’s nothing more to it than that.

        • Low Life says:

          That’s just ridiculous. Magnets work by producing directional magnetic fields, which in turn are caused by the movement of electrical charges and the magnetic moment caused by the quantum spin of elementary part-

          Who am I kidding, no one’s going to believe that.

          • JFS says:

            I did in fact find Jack Shandy’s explication on the grounds of borderline personality disordered demons much more believable than this.

  3. Captain Joyless says:

    To be fair to the ICP, electromagnetism is ultimately one of the four fundamental forces in the universe, and there’s no real explanation for why magnetism works how it does; we can only describe its effects. Why does a charged particle produce the particular magnetic field it produces? There’s no real answer to that. It just does.

    • sabrage says:

      They’d probably get a bit more sympathy if not for lines like “I don’t wanna talk to a scientist/Y’all motherfuckers lying, and getting me pissed” and “Magic everywhere in this bitch”

      • Captain Joyless says:

        True!! I think pretty much every other phenomenon they question is explainable. Ironic, then, that the meme is “magnets” when magnets are the one thing that is actually quite close to “because that’s how the universe is set up.”

        Like “Shaggy’s son looks just like Shaggy! Miracle!” – no, heredity. At some point yes, it’s “but why does the atomic particle do X?” but that’s quite far removed from inheriting your parents’ genotypes, while magnetism is not.

  4. JiminyJickers says:

    I have to say, I’m drawn to the theme of this game.

    • ZIGS says:

      No, you’re not starting another pun thread. They’re terrible. That’s my opinion and I’m sticking to it

      • Hmm-Hmm. says:

        Now, now, there’s no need for such polarising talk around here.

      • Junkie says:

        Oh for flux sake! You have to admit, this game has potential.

        • Wombats says:

          Looks attractive. Can’t wait for the developers to field some questions.

      • AngoraFish says:

        It’s not as if this thread has a monopole on bad humor, but you’re right, the idea is repulsive.

    • Geen says:

      The anticipation is driving me mad!

  5. stahlwerk says:

    Looks tentacular!

  6. Sunjammer says:

    I guess Lovecraft (aside from the HLPHS productions) is forever doomed to be shoehorned into stupid things.

  7. I want to stab you to death and play around with your blood. says:

    Looks interesting, but the melodramatic dialogue ruined it for me. Hopefully it isn’t present during the Portal-y bits.

  8. Muzman says:

    I always pronounce the name of this game wrong and it becomes MacGrunner and then I imagine it as some sort of Danish knock-off of MacGuyver.