Well, my cynicism was WELL placed [engage smug mode]. After staring at the teaser trailer for the new Batman: Arkham Origins and grumpily reporting that it provided no game footage, I’d hoped Warner Bros. would sneak in a few moments of in-game action somewhere into the full trailer. Nope, they instead created a CGI story and fight sequence that stretches to nearly five minutes. It’s Batman, goons, Deathstroke, and Black Mask. At least it provides a little bit of context this time, and there are a few screenshots to coo over now.
The trailer is everything you imagined it would be. From the “crappy criminal goons who get taken out by Batman” moments, to an explosion that was destined for slow-motion and that fshooooom noise. This isn’t the game, which is a shame because the game sounds fun. Why didn’t they show the new detective mode, which sounds genuinely intriguing: Batman can now recreate whole crime scenes, watching the action, pausing and rewinding it to find out what happened. In one scene he’ll watch a helicopter crash and have to investigate at what point the chopper blade snapped off, then retrace the bullet’s trajectory. It’s complete technical bunk and sounds like the perfect smarty-pants foil to the Bat-fu below.
I do NOT like Black Mask’s creepy face. It makes me feel weird and uncomfortable. I think I’ve discovered a phobia I didn’t realise I had. Skeletal Face Masks are not okay with me from now on. There’s too much anatomy!