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Myopia, My Horror: I Can't Find My Glasses

Things that would be a necessary part of an Alec Meer simulator:

– Strong aversion to visiting the barber
– Possibly unhealthy fixation upon cats (yes, it’s probably toxoplasmosis)
– Beans on toast and potato crisp-based diet
– Inability to see or do almost anything when not wearing glasses or contact lenses.

ElijahT’s domestic chaos/myopia sim gamette I Can’t Find My Glasses fully realises the latter, but with added toilet destruction.

In general, needing strong prescription glasses doesn’t get me down – with one key exception. Waking up every morning and being essentially blind, unable to do so much as read the clock or reassure myself that my bed hasn’t been teleported into the heart of an alien cannibal fortress, is mighty depressing. In those earliest minutes of the day, I realise how hampered I am, how I probably wouldn’t have been able to survive a few centuries ago, how much of my life depends on having discs of plastic in front of my eyes at all times. It’s awful. Then I put my glasses on, read the time, establish that my bed is, in fact, still in an English seaside town, and go demand that the coffee machine provides its life-sustaining bounty, and all is well.

Then I played I Can’t Find My Glasses and I’m straight back in my own, personal, near-sighted hell. The main thing it does is convey the helplessness of the spectacle-wearer bereft of their eye-ornamentation, but it also throws into a little Octodad-style chaos as you desperately try to uncover where the hell said specs are. It’s only when you finally find the absentee glasses that you can fully realise the scale of the carnage unleashed during the search. A fine, single-concept game, even if it did make me miserable all over again.

Via Robert Yang.

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Who am I?

Alec Meer

Senior Editor

Co-founder of RPS. Dungeon Keeper & X-COM 4 Life.

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