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5

Headblaster Is Frantic, Hilarious, Head-Exploding Fun

LOUD NOISES

You’ll be lucky if your first round of Headblaster lasts more than a minute. It’s not an unfair game by any means; it’s just that you’re working under some rather, er, strict conditions. See, you have this headache. I doubt it’s anything serious – I mean, everybody gets headaches – but you should probably cram your gullet full of heaving horse pills all the same. Just to be safe. For some reason, though, the local law enforcement types really don’t like you. But you can’t stop to talk to them because goodness gracious your cranium is really throbbing and your vision’s crackling like an old television and your skin feels like it’s covered in swirling stove tops and and and and…

And then your head explodes, destroying everything. That is how every round of Headblaster ends, and it’s basically wonderful.

The game’s mechanical push and pull, however, might be its best touch. You can’t actually harm anyone during the early stages of your headache, and pills lessen your effectiveness even further. Only when your headache meter is verging on bursting can you plough through enemies like a bowling ball wreathed in flames, so it’s a matter of maintaining that precarious balance – chomping pills only at the very last second to keep yourself from drifting back into impotency.

All of this ratchets up with remarkable speed, and enemies bring in more and more ridiculous weapons the longer you survive. Before long, Headblaster becomes mind-blowingly frantic, with you rushing around like an out-of-control 18-wheeler while the screen shudders and masses of baddies big and small congeal from nowhere.

And then you explode.

It’s an exceedingly quick game, but it’s well worth a download. Give it a go here. And maybe bring some aspirin.

Also, here is a trailer.

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Nathan Grayson

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