I Played Alien Rage Until This Happened…

I played Alien Rage until this happened…

That’s about twenty minutes in. Getting there I was faced with a sloppy, frustrating shooter, with dreadful slidey controls, and enemies that can be shot at in the head ten times before they go down, or once in the chest with the game shouting “HEADSHOT!” at you. Which was a shame, as any FPS with “SCORE” permanently written on-screen plants a flag in planet LookAtMe. Five minutes was enough, in this case.


Top comments

  1. Scumbag says:

    John is clearly bitter about this because he is John. CAN YOU NOT HEAR THE ACTION PACKED MUSIC?!?!? It creates tension and drama of a glitchy AI dodging away from your aim, and dodging into your aim.
    It clearly was a headshot as some aliens have heads in their chests and you did not take time too...

    Oh screw it! This looks shit.
  1. gravity_spoon says:

    For someone to write off a game with such a poor excuse, John Walker please stop writing. There were hardly 2 paragraphs in that article and while I agree that the game is sloppy at best, just because it has a score system doesn’t make it the only reason to not play. Grow up.

    • Ernesto25 says:

      You did watch the video right?

      • airmikee99 says:

        Why would you assume he’d watch a video embedded in an article before making an opinion about what an article with an embedded video is about? That’s just rude.

        • RPSRSVP says:

          LOL. And he probably didn’t. I mean why should he. It makes more sense to attempt to discredit John. Can’t really blame him, maybe his life is as bad as this game.

    • Sheng-ji says:

      I’m getting so bored of the “This writer is shit” brigade at the bottom of every article. Yes I know the majority of them are butthurt penny arcaders on a trolling mission, but seriously, fuck off now, no-one who is going to be swayed by your inane ramblings will even remember that article.

      • stahlwerk says:

        Hear hear!

      • slerbal says:

        I couldn’t agree more and speaking for myself personally (because I wouldn’t dare speak for anyone else) RPS is the only site I read every single day and if there is an article I don’t personally agree with I don’t feel the need to tell the entire world because that is just *my* opinion. Some games are good, some are bad, some articles are long, some don’t need to be. But hey, that’s just my opinion…

      • Senethro says:

        The negativity brigade in general have grown pretty tiresome. Its like every comments thread is a race to hate on writers/developers/fake girl gamers/some company that used DRM that one time to accumulate snark-cred.

        • mike2R says:

          It’s instinctive behaviour. They are trying to elevate their rank in the herd and improve their mating prospects.

          • JamesTheNumberless says:

            Good lord, one can only imagine what it is they intend to mate with, and what sort of offspring they would produce. Maybe this is the hoard of inhuman beasts all these FPS games are preparing us to deal with?

        • Makariel says:

          I’ve been on holidays for a couple of days and since I came back I notice that in every article. I was already wondering if the universe was punishing me for going on holidays (obviously not). So I’m still a bit puzzled what happened and who are those people and if they find everything here so miserable, why the hell do they stay? Don’t they have something useful to do with their lives and the lives of others?

          • melnificent says:

            After the Penny Arcade article, they kind of appeared and just started attacking everyone.
            They are the reason I hope for an ignore button on RPS.

          • LionsPhil says:

            It’s already there? “Block”, left hand side across from “Reply”, doesn’t look like a button but is.

          • SanguineAngel says:

            Is that right? I have noticed an increase in snark and general moaning in comments over the past few months, not just since the PA article.

          • Reefpirate says:

            “It’s already there? “Block”, left hand side across from “Reply”, doesn’t look like a button but is.”

            Blocking is for pussies. I like to read all the negativity with my black cup of coffee in the morning.

          • John Walker says:

            This pre-dates the PA stuff by quite a way. It goes back to that misogyny post in March-ish. The delights have been farting their bile ever since. But you brilliant people more than counter it all.

            (And because I have to say this, apparently – no, I’m not talking about people who disagree. I love that, and welcome it. I’m talking about the people who are rude or insulting.)

        • DiamondDog says:

          Which is funny because all this article amounts to is John posting a negative comment just for the sake of it.

          • Sheng-ji says:

            I’m not 100% convinced that warning potential customers that a newly released game is currently broken counts as “just for the sake of it”

          • Lacessit says:

            It is also an amusing little vid showing something deeply silly. ‘Amusing warning’ – ‘Random negative post’: 2-0.

          • DiamondDog says:

            Oh right yes how stupid of me, it’s common practise on RPS to give a running account of all the little niggles they find and post them in separate articles before the full review.

          • Senethro says:

            Does this merit a full review?

          • Ergates_Antius says:

            Yes, it has always been common practice with RPS to put up short posts about things they like/dislike/find amusing in games. What’s your point? Other than you’ve taken a dislike to John Walker for some arbitrary (and probably dumb) reason and want to make that known. Again.

          • Dingbatwhirr says:

            To be honest, I think the esteemed and honourable (disputed) author’s point was also made for the sake of comedy. Watching aliens complete their morning exercises before being brutally dispatched by a shot to the head always brightens my day.

          • LionsPhil says:

            Imagine John posted the video link as a Tweet with a “LOL” after it.

            There you go.

          • DiamondDog says:

            I don’t dislike John at all (“Again”?) so please don’t make things up to turn me into a target. I think this is a very pointless article, but obviously I should have kept my mouth shut.

            I would be interested if you could point to the other times they’ve done this? I can’t think of a recent one, but my memory is pretty shoddy.

            Edit: That just makes it worse, LionsPhil.

          • Ergates_Antius says:

            Firstly, appologies if I’m mistaken you for one of the hoards of John-haters.

            But I think “… I think this is a very pointless article…” gets to the point nicely. What you mean a “pointless article”. Since when did RPS articles have to have a point? This is a PC gaming blog, People read it for entertainment and to learn about new/old games (etc.). This isn’t the UN, a short trivial article isn’t going to distract us from the important business at hand.

            So what if John posted a short piece of video snark about a shitty game?

          • JamesTheNumberless says:

            Oh right, yes of course this is completely against the Geneva convention on acceptable reasons for games blog posts. John Walker should be tried for internet crimes. How dare he blog what he wants to blog on his blog!

          • DiamondDog says:

            John can post whatever the hell he likes. I just thought it was funny that some people jumped on gravity_spoon for being negative when John’s post was basically “look, isn’t this crap” and nothing else.

            But thank you for completely overstating my point to make me look hysterical.

          • airmikee99 says:

            Do you have a video to show that the game isn’t crap?


            So you’re not refuting the claim made in the article and video, you’re attacking the author of the article for sharing an opinion. I hope you don’t think you’re being the bigger person here.

          • JamesTheNumberless says:

            You are aware, aren’t you, that you wrote this?:

            “I would be interested if you could point to the other times they’ve done this? I can’t think of a recent one, but my memory is pretty shoddy.”


            “That just makes it worse, LionsPhil.”

            The implication is that you think John is doing something he shouldn’t be doing, or should be doing something differently. You’re just denying the intent behind your words, and the words of the original poster. Nobody is overstating your point by clarifying this.

          • Axyl says:

            Nobody jumped on gravity spoon for being negative. It was for being rude. Huge difference. :)

          • DiamondDog says:

            “The negativity brigade in general have grown pretty tiresome.”

            I don’t mean to pick on Senethro but that was the crux of what I was replying to. John posted a quick article full of negative thoughts on this game, outside of a full review. I think that’s pretty tiresome. That’s all. I don’t hate John or want him to stop writing or think he should run off a cliff. Everyone else has lumped that intent on me.

            So yeah, I think mock outrage, the Geneva Convention and “internet crimes” is definitely overstating it, James. I think I’m allowed to express my dislike of an RPS article without getting worked up about it.

          • hotmaildidntwork says:

            You think it’s tiresome for these bloggers to post their thoughts about a game outside of the review for that game? Here on this blog maintained for the purpose of posting thoughts, anecdotes, news, reviews, and other paraphernalia regarding gaming?

            I just want to be entirely clear on this.

          • DiamondDog says:

            “You think it’s tiresome for these bloggers to post their thoughts about a game outside of the review for that game?”

            In the context of people being tired of whiny negative comments then yes, I’d put a paragraph of complaints and a 20 second video in the same bracket.

          • Shadram says:

            “Oh right yes how stupid of me, it’s common practise on RPS to give a running account of all the little niggles they find and post them in separate articles before the full review.”

            I think this is the full review. And it’s a very succinct and amusing one, telling people exactly what they need to know.

      • InternetBatman says:


      • wyrmsine says:

        I just assume they’re friends of the writer, winding them up.

      • Sc0r says:

        listen to this one, he/she speaks truth.

      • Stardreamer says:

        I’m also utterly sick of it.

        I’m convinced we lost Quinns, an absolutely fabulous writer, because of this kind of bullshit. One bad review and baiting him became something of a sport. Poor John has to deal with morons hating on him every time he puts finger to keyboard these days.

        If you can’t post an opinion without resorting to abusing the writing staff then your place is not on RPS, it’s on Youtube or Kotaku or just anywhere else but here.

        • frightlever says:

          QS was a brilliant writer, almost equal to replacing KG, but didn’t he just kinda move on with his life? He does board game review for EG and Kotaku from time to time but other than that does he do much video game writing?

          Oh, and I think it’s perfectly okay to disagree with an article so long as it’s not rabid. Merciless, no. Mercilessly funny, yes. JW writes plenty of articles that are DESIGNED to provoke rigorous debate so you can’t excuse the writing staff from any and all criticism.

        • dicenslice says:

          Well, that New Vegas review was pretty bad…

        • Nick says:

          Uh, thought he left to do that PR thing with someone (Paradox?) for a while, then did something else.

        • Stardreamer says:

          Weird that comments about rudeness are somehow always conflated with banning criticism altogether. Done properly and respectfully, criticism is awesome.

          He might very well have simply left to pursue other interests but the timing of his departure made me suspicious. Reading between the lines it looked like he was cutting his losses. Who knows what might have happened had he not posted that review (yeah, it wasn’t great)? We might still be seeing guests spots from him now.

          That’s my personal musings anyway. I have no basis in fact to think that way. It just…fits.

      • derbefrier says:

        lies, you all love the opportunity to attack someone just as much as they guys love getting you all worked up. If you all were truly bored there wouldn’t be 50 replies to this comment, you would just ignore it and get on with your lives.

      • Frank says:

        Hear hear! Blocked that one, not for rudeness so much as wasting my time by putting down words without even looking at the video.

        I guess the most recent crop came from Penny Arcade. Before that, they were after Mr Grayson as well for contributing some posts about gender in gaming. I also suspect that some long-timers have internalized the “John is a really bad healer” joke and think he’s unqualified to enjoy or have an opinion on non-adventure games.

    • RobF says:

      You did watch the video *and* read the article, right?

      “just because it has a score system doesn’t make it the only reason to not play”

      “Which was a shame, as any FPS with “SCORE” permanently written on-screen plants a flag in planet LookAtMe”

    • Jerusahat says:

      Wouldn’t it be easier if you just stopped visiting? Everyone’s happy that way.

    • Gap Gen says:

      I assume this isn’t a full review.

    • DatonKallandor says:

      He wanted to like it BECAUSE it has a score meter, not hated it because it did.

    • John Walker says:

      The score system was the reason I wanted to play. Like I wrote. Please give up reading.

      • iainl says:

        Oh, I think that boat has sailed.

      • aldo_14 says:

        That implies he started readining in the first place.

        • Stardreamer says:

          I like to believe he actually can’t, and that his comment is the result of a tremendous series of coincidences arising from his mashing the keyboard with giant meaty fists and forehead.

          • MacTheGeek says:

            An infinite number of monkeys are now worried about their future job prospects.

      • Siimon says:

        Since you stated it was a sloppy and frustrating shooter with poor controls, I have no problem with a short review with a video showing what may be poor programming or a one-off glitch. I’ll take your word for it being a crud game.
        However, thats a pretty snyde remark there about giving up reading.
        “any FPS with “SCORE” permanently written on-screen plants a flag in planet LookAtMe”
        For the record, I read this at the game being an attention-wh*re, not that you personally had interest in anything with SCORE on it.

        Anyway: keep up the good work, but keep in mind that not everyone reads your words with your mind.

        My 2c. Thanks!

        • RobF says:

          How exactly can a game be an attention whore?

          (aside from having SCORE on it, obviously)

          • JamesTheNumberless says:

            Oh come on, you know those games that are always posting on Facebook about their personal problems, and indirectly seeking everybody’s opinion on them, fishing for compliments and the like. Always have the most revealing box designs on the shelves too.

          • Siimon says:

            To me, a game with “SCORE” on it could either be a throwback to high score-hunting of older games (eg, I see it as a possibly positive thing) or it could be the new FarmVille-type stuff that incessantly shouts “play me play me play me” despite being a pile of crap.
            Knowing little to nothing about this particular game combined with the overall negative attitude of the review I took it to mean the game was screaming “PLAY ME!” despite being a stinky pile.

        • John Walker says:

          He told me to stop writing! So I told him to stop reading. That was all – a joke in response to his quite remarkable demand.

        • JamesTheNumberless says:

          Fine in principle if we’re discussing an arbitrary piece of literature


          There really is only one way to read that combination of words and punctuation in that order, in English; given the purpose, journalistic prose format, and target audience of the text and the context of the paragraph in which they appear.

          The score in the screenshot was an element that attracted him to play the game. It’s cited as something promising in juxtaposition with something disappointing, that the game is shit. Why would you juxtapose one negative with another negative and indicate that this was a disappointment? Would you write “The game was shit, disappointing because the marketing was desperate” No, although that might be funny in a surrealist way.

          This blog post is indeed short for review, it’s true. It’s also a dubious cure for cancer, and a lousy cook

          • Siimon says:

            Obviously there is more than one way to read since I (and a few others) did read it differently from you/from its intended meaning.

            “This game is probably FarmVille*, but we decided to give it a go anyway because what we do is review games and we don’t know for sure until we try it ourselves. Turns out, its a buggy pile of FarmVille*”
            *FarmVille, to me, is an attention wh*re and a shit game.
            Nowhere did I read that “I went in expecting greatness, but came out disappointed”. I just read “I expected shit, and ‘Five minutes was enough, in this case.’ to verify that it was shit.”

            Again, this isn’t to fault the writer. Perhaps I’m just biased because “planet LookAtMe” has a negative connotation to me.

    • JamesTheNumberless says:

      Errm… the score system was cited as a reason it was worth a look, because it suggests fun, which is something rarely seen in an FPS. Not a negative. Stop reading his articles if you don’t like his writing… You’re not even reading properly anyway.

    • VA1N says:

      You’re brave to watch the video and still defend this game.

    • Bull0 says:

      He’s right, of course. John, from now on don’t bother publishing anything less than 3000 words, with a beginning, middle, end, at least one joke, one poignant moment, one twist, and no less than 5 screenshots. Even if you just want to show us a funny bug with a 22-second video. I’m SURE you could’ve wrangled a few paragraphs out of that. C- Must try harder


    • Lemming says:

      I hereby revoke your oxygen privileges.

    • SuicideKing says:

      Oh boo hoo. Get of the internet and go outside.

      Alternatively DEAL WITH IT.

  2. Scumbag says:

    John is clearly bitter about this because he is John. CAN YOU NOT HEAR THE ACTION PACKED MUSIC?!?!? It creates tension and drama of a glitchy AI dodging away from your aim, and dodging into your aim.
    It clearly was a headshot as some aliens have heads in their chests and you did not take time too…

    Oh screw it! This looks shit.

  3. ran93r says:

    Every day I’m shufflin’

  4. Koojav says:

    Don’t buy this game. Just don’t.
    – optimization
    – 2009 graphics
    – flares, flares, flares
    – laughable mouse support

    • stahlwerk says:

      That’s not very much graphics, indeed.

      • RobF says:

        It’s 6 more than Colonial Marines had so that’s not bad.

      • Nick says:

        I don’t play any games unless they have at least 13,000 graphics.

        • Sc0r says:

          Thats far too much, afaik more than 10000 graphics are military-tech-level and forbidden in most countries.

        • Makariel says:

          but are these clockwise or counterclockwise graphics? I heard 3 clockwise graphics are at least as good as 5 counterclockwise graphics, maybe more.

        • John Walker says:

          Typical graphicsophile. The human eye can’t even see over 11,500 graphics!

          • Gap Gen says:

            That’s not entirely true – while you can’t perceive individual graphics at that level, people can reliably notice an improvement in the number of graphics up to 25000, with some people being able to detect up to 100000 depending on age, eyesight, 1337haxxorness, etc.

          • aldo_14 says:

            I saw 15010 graphics once.

            But nobody believes me.

          • Sheng-ji says:

            I can see this many graphics

            *stretches arms out as wide as possible*

          • Makariel says:

            I see dead pixel.

          • PostieDoc says:

            I can see 7 graphics.
            No 8 graphics.
            No I was right the first time.

          • Sparkasaurusmex says:

            That’s why I have two eyes. 23,000 graphics F.T.W!

          • Sharlie Shaplin says:

            I can definitely see over 9000 graphics for sure.

          • Low Life says:

            All those graphics will be lost in time, like tears in rain.

          • stupid_mcgee says:

            True story: I used to love to graphics. I would install a new game and just graphic out. Sometimes all day long and late into the night. Then, one day, I found out I had visual aids from abusing too much graphics.

            Gaming on Ultra graphics ruined my life.

        • Bull0 says:

          Basically anything over 9,000 and you’re good. Like calories

      • Aaarrrggghhh says:

        Does anyone remember the good old times time when 16 graphics was enough?

        • LionsPhil says:

          Sixteen? Luxury! In my day, we had one graphic between us, and we all had t’ share it!

          • Malibu Stacey says:

            …uphill in the snow…..mumble mumble…kids these days…. don’t know they’re born….mumble mumble….I’ll get me coat…

          • JamesTheNumberless says:

            … and when we got home our Dad would slice us in two wit’ bread knife.

          • Bull0 says:

            We had to get up at 11pm, two hours before we’d gone to bed, clean the graphic, eat a handful of cold gravel, go to mill and pay mill owner for privilege of coming to work, and when we got home our parents would kill us and dance on our graves singing hallelujah

          • Lord Custard Smingleigh says:

            Graphics? I had system beep and I had to pretend it were graphics.

          • RobF says:

            Lucky bastard. My mum just used to stand behind me and make humming sounds…

            …but to be fair, that had nothing to do with games. She just liked to do that. It was odd.

          • Tom De Roeck says:

            And in the game.

          • Bull0 says:

            You were lucky to have a mum. We made do wit’ cardboard cutout of Beverly D’Angelo

          • JamesTheNumberless says:

            Cardboard? Oh you lucky bastard, our mum were a paper bag wit’ eyes drawn on it.

          • hotmaildidntwork says:

            Eyes?! You fortunate sod! All we had on our brown paper mother-substitute were a pair of depressions that vaguely resembled eyes!

          • Panda Powered says:

            Back in my day we had to make our own graphics from pine cones and twigs.

      • SuicideKing says:

        All the lonely graphics
        Where do they all come from?

    • Stuart Walton says:

      Ditto on the lens flare. It’s all about colour separation these days.

    • Jimmy says:

      Law of All the Graphics: graphics accumulate on average n+1/yr where n = last year. Therefore Crysis 2 was made in the future, and shows what flares will look like IN THE FUTURE.

  5. maximiZe says:


  6. slerbal says:

    Yep that would have been my response as well.

  7. Nemon says:

    I think the dude is dancing to the music, slightly off but points for trying.

    • slerbal says:

      “Dance, dance gunverlution”? (ug that was a horrible portmanteau… sorry!)

      • Llewyn says:

        Yes, it was a bit gunverluted. (I’m sorry, ok, I’m SORRY!)

        • slerbal says:

          Oh no! That was a gundawful thing to say…. (I’ll get my coat…)

  8. LionsPhil says:

    He was just trying to get his cardio in so he could live past 40, you murderer. :(

    • Gap Gen says:

      I imagined him saying “PEEKABOO! HA HA! PEEKABOO!”

      Or indeed the AI going “Shit! Better hide! OK, gonna see what’s up. Shit! Better hide! OK, gonna see what’s up.” etc.

    • aldo_14 says:

      He probably just really wanted to pee, but was scared of the gun every time he ran to the bog.

    • strangeloup says:

      “Shit, have I left the gas on?”
      “Nope, I’ve got to fight a bald space marine.”
      “Shit, have I left the gas on?”
      (repeat until dead)

  9. CookPassBabtridge says:

    There is an explanation for the hit-weirdness. The weapons are Hitscan (with possibly over-egged ‘random perturbations’), which in my limited understanding and quick reading of wikipedia may explain the randomness of hits. TB talked about it and found it annoying too (the weapon unpredictability I mean)

    • Baines says:

      It doesn’t look like there is any hit weirdness. The first shot hits the shoulder. The alien bends over, presumably from being hit. This just happens to put the head dead center of the gunsight, causing the second shot to be a head shot.

      • CookPassBabtridge says:

        Indeed this is true, though I wasn’t talking about the video – more the comments John made about shots not seeming to go where intended generally. It must feel a bit like having Half Life 2 on hard and running out of ammo for the useful weapons. I recall emptying full submachine gun (which apparently is hitscan too) magazines at Combine Soldiers, and they would just appear to sneeze red mucus a bit before shooting you in the face. God I hated that gun. Never enough ammo for the Pulse Rifle :D

        • hotmaildidntwork says:

          It was crime that you could only carry, what? 4 clips? For that glorious weapon?

  10. BobbyDylan says:

    Lol. You was being trolled by the AI.

  11. hideinlight says:

    That’s what happens if you create AI that is too human-like, they become trolls.

  12. Mr Ogs says:

    Rhythmic sidestepping. Why don’t we see more of this?

  13. neems says:

    Actually if you look closely it does appear to hit him in the head – after the first shot his head goes down, and the next burst appears to carry upwards.

    Nice AI though.

  14. BPongo says:

    Giantbomb gives it look if anyone is interested:
    link to giantbomb.com

  15. nopol10 says:

    I think people like the one shown in the video shouldn’t be judged based on where they decide to exercise. Even if you do want to judge these people, maybe you could find out more about the reason behind their behaviour instead of shoot them in the head. Perhaps next time you come across them you could just walk away?

  16. Ergates_Antius says:

    Maybe you hit his *other* head.

  17. MrSean490 says:

    trololol AI.

    Not that bad, seen worse I think.

  18. melnificent says:

    Can you not hear the sound in the background? He’s doing the beep test.

    Run in time with the beeps,
    the time between beeps will decrease as the level increases.
    If you miss 3 beeps you are out.

    • Dingbatwhirr says:

      *shudder* Uugh, the bleep test… You’ve just brought back some horrible memories from school… If my recollection of that form of torture is correct, then John did the alien a favour by shooting him…

  19. Hunchback says:

    I played it till i hit the first boss. Tried it for 20 minutes on normal, gave up and tried another 10 on easy, cursed and swore, got pissed beyond belief and deleted this shit. :S

    And i used to play Quake 3 on a decent-if-not-pro level…

  20. dE says:

    Oddly enough I enjoyed this game a great deal, in a similar way as I enjoyed Marlow Briggs. It’s stupid and it knows it. Luckily I haven’t seen AI glitches like that, even thought it was actually quite decent. It was actively searching me behind cover and dodged left and right on its approach. That and the destructible cover had me constantly running, dodging and shooting with occasional kaboom spots for fireworks.
    One thing I’ll happily say though, play on the lowest difficulty it offers (challenging). The higher difficulties scale in a really stupid way and make enemies bullet sponges. Challenging on the other hand is the right balance between actually being a challenge and enemies taking reasonable amounts of hits.

  21. Angel Dust says:

    Aw, I actually had some fun with this and I’ve been lucky enough to have not encountered any of the technical issues. I found it had some nice chunky weapons for turning the big chunky enemies into little chunky giblets and for $15 I thought it looked pretty good. I never had any trouble downing enemies with headshots either.

    The backstory isn’t awful either. I mean, it’s not brilliant literature but the whole humans and aliens were working together before something went wrong (most likely humans being dicks) is certainly a step-up from the aliens vs humans stuff. It’s also backed up by little touches in the levels like bilingual signs and the harmless alien workers you stumble across, which is nice. Pity that the main story is the adventures of Dude Duderson in Alien Genocide but I haven’t finished it yet to see if the two threads meet in any way. Why haven;t I finished it? Well, Shadow Warrior came out and as fun as I was finding this, it can’t compete with that.

  22. Reapy says:

    It’s funny what our minds tolerate per genera based on what AAAhas recently been developing. Just looking at the screenshot and clip (only heard of this game here) I see some decent character models and nice animations, but a simple ai bug (which is probably representative of the whole game) and it is easy to move on.

    I think it’s why for indies or budget games it is dangerous to produce in AAA categories, fps especially, the flaws are too apparent and easily compared to many other titles that can’t be matched.

    • dE says:

      which is probably representative of the whole game

      Nah, not really. In my time, playing from start to finish, I haven’t seen such behavior or oddities. It’s mediocre dumb fun, but not nearly as broken as that short piece seems to indicate.

      • airmikee99 says:

        You may have had a point, if every other gaming website weren’t giving it identical reviews.

        • dE says:

          Well since you think you’ve got an actual point, let’s check what every other review site is saying. Or if you’re just blathering about review scores.

          “A standard sci-fi adventure, that, for a small price, is actually fun […] if you know what you’re getting into” Gamestar
          “It’s a completely capable and attractive shooter that does almost nothing special. I had fun playing it” Game Revolution
          “The new first-person shooter from City Interactive is not that bad for fans of old-style FPS […] but the flaws are not flaws to be underestimated” IGN

          So a generic shooter with flaws, that’s actually fun and costs little. So how about that “if every other gaming website weren’t giving it identical reviews.” you mentioned? Try again. Next time also factor in that this isn’t even a review yet.

          • airmikee99 says:

            Did you just copy and paste those quotes without even reading them?

            “if you know what you’re getting into”
            “that does almost nothing special.”
            “but the flaws are not flaws to be underestimated”

            How are any of those comments different from “sloppy, frustrating shooter, with dreadful slidey controls.”?

            And I have to wonder why you stopped at three comments from other gaming websites? Could it be because the rest of them didn’t like the game at all?

            “I didn’t get very far into Alien Rage, I’m going to admit that right off the bat. It was not, however, for the want of trying. There are parts in Alien Rage where the game decides that working properly is for losers, so it doesn’t work properly. ” -Destructoid

            “Ultimately, Alien Rage is a hard game to recommend.” -Gamespot

            “I had fun playing it, but at this point there are other older games on Steam you can play for the same amount of money that I’d recommend many heartbeats sooner.” -The next sentence from Game Revolution, no wonder you stopped the quote at “I had fun playing it.”.

            “So no. It’s not bad. It just regularly wanders in that direction, and with so many other shooters out there – much better shooters, many of which came out a long time ago and are now dirt cheap – its budget price of £15 isn’t enough to salvage even a grudging recommendation.” -Inc Gamers

            “Alien Rage Review: A game so bad, it defies witty, metaphoric titles” -GameZone

            Yeah, like I said, nearly identical reviews. You may have assumed this is the first time I’ve heard about this game, and you would have assumed incorrectly, this thing has been on my Steam wishlist for months, and I have been diligently following it in hopes it’d make up for the pisspoor Colonial Marines.

            Wanna go again, or wouldn’t you prefer a nice game of chess?

          • dE says:

            I picked three quotes, one from a high score, one from a middle score and one from a lower score to indicate they all say that the game is flawed but fun. You posting a bunch more doesn’t change that at all. Your “every other review” is still refuted.
            Although it seems like you’re on a vendetta to make this seem like the worst possible game ever made and no amount of arguments or facts is going to change that. No amount of reviews either. So keep on trucking, buddy. If your world is binary and only knows best or worst game ever made, it’s a shallow world. But one befitting of the amount of rage and bile you show in your usual comments (this and other articles). No, we don’t need to go again, I don’t like bullying the weak and shallow.

    • Mman says:

      To be fair various other issues were mentioned; this was presumably just the straw that broke the Camel’s back.

    • Baines says:

      A simple AI bug, which in and of itself isn’t that far from what you might find in the average AAA game, no less. Decent AI isn’t exactly a priority of developers these days, after all.

      Presumably the alien is stuck in his dance because the player’s aim is dead on the sweet spot of the alien’s movement to leave cover. John moving would probably have broke the pattern. John firing certainly broke the pattern. In an arcadish shooter, the average player will be moving and firing instead of watching the AI dance.

  23. ioNKi says:

    So you’re saying this game is not going straight to the GOTY list?

    Howdy, btw, newcomer here.

    • Stardreamer says:

      Howdy! Long-timer here (life sentence). Welcome to the joys of commenting on RPS. Help yourself to a biscuit.

  24. phelix says:

    Speaking of Rage

    • LionsPhil says:

      That one seems verging on sensible, though, trying to snatch a glimpse of the player, but hiding again when he sees that the player is aiming at him. When the player stops to reload, the AI makes a move—just not a very smart one. But it’s showing more awareness and reactivity than the dancing alien above.

  25. TwwIX says:

    I have played UT2003 mods with better production value.

  26. squirrel says:

    Don’t be so mean. This’s just a minor bug, isn’t it?

  27. Javier-de-Ass says:

    Forget Alien Rage. Deadfall Adventures is coming! The real actual FARM51 game. Burn in hell City Interactive.

  28. Perplexelerator says:

    That’s harsh punishment for someone playing a little “now you see me, now you don’t.”

  29. stoner says:

    John’s article boils down to: This game has horrible AI. Here’s a video example.

    We don’t need a 2000-word in-depth analysis when a few words and an example will suffice.

    • Sleepymatt says:

      To be fair, using the standard 1 picture = 1000 words, that means we’re still being short-changed by a picture. Come on John, pull your finger out!

      • Panda Powered says:

        Add the video’s 25 frames per second for 22 seconds and its one of the longest articles in RPS history. Good job John!

  30. FreshwaterAU says:

    Yeah this is all I needed to see. No to alien rage

  31. Robbert says:

    So because there is at least one bug in the game it’s automatically shit?

    • airmikee99 says:

      You missed the pisspoor graphics?
      You missed the sloppy controls?
      You missed the sloppy, pisspoor graphics?

      Did you even watch the video?

    • Hanban says:

      Yes. Those were his exact words.

  32. Lagwolf says:

    Avoid this and get Shadow Warrior methinks

  33. deadly.by.design says:

    Bulletstorm did the same HEADSHOT business, as well as ANUS SHOT. So, why is it so annoying now?

  34. Jake says:

    Seems like this enemy AI had a plan and stuck to it – a strategy so fiendish and baffling that we can’t even begin to comprehend it but whatever he was building up to I bet it was a killer. And sure it didn’t pay off and he looked a little foolish but if his tactics had worked he would have been considered a genius, a hero even. It was a high risk strategy, he fumbled it and he got headshot for his mistake, I think that is penance enough. But he was so close to pulling off something pretty damn spectacular. I expect.

    We shouldn’t punish AIs for taking a risk and trying something unorthodox, otherwise all games will just be guys kneeling in cover. We should reward this AI for trying something different. Hell, with a different player this just might have worked. Crazy son of a bitch, I admire his moxy.

    • JamesTheNumberless says:

      Still he made his statement about cover based shooters, and made it in a blaze of glory. He will always be remembered as that AI in that article where the movement that eventually wiped out all writing of English on the internet started.

  35. engion3 says:

    hahhahaha, this make’s me want to try the game…

  36. fish99 says:

    I guess id are licensing out the Doom 3 AI code.

  37. Muzman says:

    It’s meant to be a bit of a fast paced old school shooter, so a bit of dicey AI is ok. It has quite nice animations too, for a cheapy.
    More concerning I think is the report of squishy controls.

  38. psuedonymous says:

    I think you need to wiggle the bunny-ears on your scope. Or move it further away from the microwave.

  39. phylum sinter says:

    Rabble rabble rabble, rouse rouse rouse.

    I wonder if all this hate/counterhate will have any effect on the style of posting on RPS in the future.

    Personally, I was hoping the flamey responses might morph into a discussion on the responsibility of being a (popular) blog, even if it is just a silly games blog. Can we get there, or will this just fizzle into nothing?

  40. geldonyetich says:

    This is the best extreme dance simulator I’ve ever seen. The opponent’s form was impeccable! And to include actual guns in the routine, that’s incredibly original! Color me impres-

    What? It’s supposed to be a first person shooter? Hmm… yeah, that could be a problem.

  41. Panda Powered says:

    Perhaps it’s the next generation of AI sidestepping. Barely beating Golden Eye 64.

  42. Biblefruit says:

    That made me remember a particular encounter I had with some Fallout 3 bandits:

  43. spectone says:

    This makes me think of what would happen if FPSs bred. Remember the great AI from Unreal and Q3 Arena. Imagine if they had sex, then the DNA of the baby FPS was bombarded with radiation which corrupted the AI code. You could end up with something like this.

  44. Gamera says:

    (^’ ‘^)
    <( ' ' <)
    (v' 'v)

  45. Neurotic says:

    I suspect there are a lot of RPS readers who are entirely unfamiliar with John’s writing in PCG UK. He’s always had an acerbic wit, and although I don’t always agree with him (in fact, sometimes I curse his commie-pinko-hippy name), I couldn’t imagine being a PC gamer without him. Or Jim, Stoney, Craig, Ross, Graham and so on. I still miss Sutherns and PIckstock for heaven’s sake.