Totally Not Dark Souls: Lords Of The Fallen Touts Difficulty

I can’t imagine it’s easy being a videogame door. One day your kind is totally invincible – your unassuming lacquered flesh the only thing capable of withstanding a fully buffed out hero’s galaxy lance machine punch gun – and the next the merest of kicks explodes you into splinters. That’s why I really feel for the door in the trailer for former Witcher 2 man Tomasz Gop’s Lords of the Fallen, which gets kicked, split, splattered, bashed, mashed, boiled, and stuck in a stew over and over and over forever. The very overtly Dark-Souls-influenced dungeon crawl is Hard apparently, so you’ll be busting into its boss rooms repeatedly in your quest to bonk the hulking monstro-jerks until they fall down just right. Watch below.

That ‘roided-out member of the Pyramid Head family? His name is Champion Lord, which sounds like the kind of thing an overzealous pretend-playing six-year-old would call themselves on the Field of Battle. But anyway, here’s what he’s all about:

“The Champion Lord has always been a bit different from other commanders of the Fallen God’s demonic army. For them, it was all about honor and discipline. For the Champion it was all about the intensity of a duel and the bloodthirsty satisfaction from defeating an opponent. Where other Lords would respectfully circle around their opponent, the easily enraged Champion will charge right into the fray with his pure brute force. He always likes to get his hands dirty, so his weapons of choice need to be close to his body, allowing him to smell the blood of his victims. Of course, at close range, his boiling bloodlust and reckless charges don’t leave him much in terms of defense, but who would stand against a hulking brute like him? You?”

YOU? DO YOU DARE? IF NOT I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND NO PRESSURE.

The trailer demonstrates many weapon and ability-based ways you could go about attempting to defeat him, though admittedly not in much detail. It all looks rather solid – like a more arcade-y Dark Souls, albeit one that could perhaps use a little more oomph in its combat.

Lords of the Fallen will be out this fall. Because of course it will. Lords of the Winteren just doesn’t have the same ring to it.