Anteria Decorating: The Settlers – Kingdoms Of Anteria

And so it has come to pass. Revelation chapter thirteen tells of the beast that rose from the sea, “upon his heads the name of blasphemy”, and old blaspheme-bonce is followed by other portents of the end-times. The final chapters of Revelation introduce yet more incredible signs of doom, so incredible in fact that they have long been considered apocryphal. Take this excerpt from chapter 47: “Yea, from the mountain a rumbling, a crack in the firmament, a host cried out in anguish and looked upon the plummy terror of a third-person Settlers action game. Or maybe even a sodding MOBA.” Can it be that we live in those times even now? A trailer for the newly announced Kingdoms Of Anteria caused me to tremble and gnash.

No. Wait. It’s all OK, isn’t it? This is just a very silly trailer that takes a while to look like a Settlers game. Phew. No need to adopt the brace position in the under-bunker just yet. In fact, maybe we’re entering a land of milk and honey (and wood, stone, grain, iron ore etc) because I hear that the previous Settlers game was actually a bit of alright. I haven’t played it but it’s no exaggeration to say that the original is an unusual entry on my never-fully-realised list of favourite games.

It’s a sedate and beautiful thing and now that I’m thinking about exactly how sedate and beautiful it is, I’m becoming a bit annoyed by all of those growling, snarling idiot monsters in the trailer up there. Maybe it is time to take shelter after all. Just to be safe.


  1. Shar_ds says:

    And then they’ll make it require an online connection again, and I won’t play it despite really wanting to :(

    • XhomeB says:

      They patched the always-online requirement out of Settlers 7. Luckily.

      • Zaxwerks says:

        Thanks goodness. I refused to buy it until it had gone. It took them aaaaaaages to patch it out though, it took months longer than any of their other games. Luckily Ubisoft (I hope) have seen the light with regards to their idiotic “always online solution” and have (mostly) dropped it. However having lived through some of the moronic things their management seem to come out with every couple of years I wouldn’t put it past them to devise some other stupid DRM solution.

  2. rustybroomhandle says:

    But will it require all those “value added services” that they said Ubisoft games should have. You know, the ones that will make people “want to buy the game”. The ones that likely all require Uplay to work.

    My last Ubi game was Might & Magic Heroes VI which had some really goofy “value added services” like sign-posts in-game where you could leave hints for other players. These hints were helpful notes like “trolololololol” and every kind of inappropriate “ism”* imaginable.

    * but no journalism

    • XhomeB says:

      Sounds like Dark Souls!
      Jokes aside, Conflux wasn’t the best idea, but Heroes VI was perfectly playable in offline mode. They only things you wouldn’t get access to were some online-only, overpowered dynasty items. No big deal.

  3. XhomeB says:

    I really liked Settlers 7, it brought the series back on the right track after the rather lackluster S5 and 6.
    Not sure what to think after watching that trailer, to be honest… they seem to have introduced some hero classes? Maybe they’re taking a leaf out of Majesty’s book and will attempt to combine exploration and village/city building?
    I kind of wish Blue Byte would stop experimenting with the winning formula they already had. Focus on returning to the basics instead. Settlers was awesome, because building a rather diverse economy, gathering materials and transporting them to various structures for processing was fun as heck. It’s a slow paced, yet exciting and rewarding series.
    Crossing fingers they don’t go crazy this time, the last thing I expect are some RTS elements or mechanics straight out of MOBAs.

    • Ginger Yellow says:

      If you don’t last hit the trees, you don’t get the timber.

  4. Heliocentric says:

    Settlers 7 was a return to form, but far too complicated for its real core, borrowing too much from Anno and its players long beards, (I assume lady anno players weave their head hair into pseudobeards). Settlers 2: 10th Anniversary ( link to ) is clearly the series highpoint, where recruitment of military revolved around forging weapons with mined ore and plying the citezens with beer (and I assume some unseen press-gang). If I need to micromanage some adventurers in this one I’ll throw the games vestigial disc up in the air in defiance but probably return to playing it.

    • The First Door says:

      Out of interest how was the Settlers 7 too complicated? I’m no disagreeing, I’m curious! I remember playing through it and thinking it reminded me very heavily of Settlers 2, albeit with settlers moving things between buildings rather than flags. Having said that, I never did finish it.

      • RedViv says:

        They put about a dozen ways to race to victory onto a very streamlined and sped-up version of the usual Settlers resource chain model. It’s very heavily focused on multiplayer struggle rather than building up a nice settlement.
        That only becomes noticeable in the campaign about half-way in and then the difficulty spikes very much within one or two missions, so you might not have gotten to that point.

      • satsui says:

        I disagree, actually. I found the game just the right amount of complexity with a very user-friendly UI. The one thing I didn’t like about the game was the lack of (free) maps.

    • Premium User Badge

      MonkeyMonster says:

      Oh great… there i was planning to use my holiday to do things in the garden or personal projects and what happens. I see a link to buying settlers 2 updated for a few pence over 3 quid. Right… yeah. Bye bye outdoors. Heliocentric I loathe you. Yet some small part hugs you with glee.

  5. RedViv says:

    Well it was about time! Hopefully this one won’t be another attempt to merge it with that Other Settlers Wot Is A Boardgame. While the second attempt at that wasn’t bad, it was straying rather far from what made other Settlers games so fun.

  6. Gothnak says:

    Looks to me like a:

    Go questing, get resources, bring them back to permanent base town which slowly levels up. Probably with costs that when paid take ‘8 hours’ to build a building, but can be hurried up for 3 premium currency. These buildings then allow your heroes to go back out into the world with different equipment which can be made at the blacksmith, but takes 4 hours to make unless you pay 1 premium currency to speed it up.

    Game designed, you can all go back to sleep now.. :)

  7. The First Door says:

    I know The Settlers 2 already exists, but I really would love them just to remake The Settlers 2 in a modern engine. I adore the way that game did almost everything. Your villages felt so alive because you could see every single resource moving around the place!

    This does not look like that, sadly.

    • Shadowcat says:

      Erm, they already did that.

      • The First Door says:

        Well, bugger, I’d completely forgotten that the 10th anniversary edition existed and was in 3D! Still, that’ll mean I’ll just end up playing that and not the new one!

      • Malcolm says:

        Having recently picked up the Settlers 2: 10th anniversay edition from GOG I was alarmed to realise that it is already 8 years old. Time they started developing the 20th anniversary edition, although its not clear what even shinier graphics could bring (although I’d like to be able to zoom out further and the zoom in is strangely jerky).

    • BooleanBob says:

      I really liked that about the Settlers 2, although the sheen came off a bit when it dawned on me that the sole purpose of every resource was ultimately to contribute to the waging of war. Which itself was more than a bit pants due to everything being so maddeningly hands-off. And the campaign was way too repetitive. And.. why am I reinstalling it as I type this?

      • Turkey says:

        Why do they always insist on putting in some kind of warfare thing into these games? It’s always bad.

      • The First Door says:

        That’s a fair point! I seem to remember always giving up on the campaign by the time you get to a level which is a barren wasteland with loads of people trying to kill you. That level and the vomiting level in Theme Hospital are the roadblocks of my childhood.

        Having said that, I massively enjoy faffing around with it up until then and playing maps with the enemies turned off. Might be why I love Banished so much too, no enemies apart from player driven starvation.

  8. AmirBan says:

    is it going to be F2P again ? or online only shit like the last one ?
    anyway, ubisoft can put this + rainbow6’s male & female hostages or hostesses and it’s E3 awards in his lair’s ass

  9. doodler says:

    I am interested as I always am in settlers games but the Ubisoft pill is a tough one to swallow. I will wait until the game comes out to glowing reviews about the lack of DRM and uplay and in the meantime play Factorio.

  10. RedViv says:

    Hours later, a random thought hit me:
    What if this trailer means to show us they combined Majesty and Settlers?