“Developed by certified pyrotechnicians” declares the launch trailer for Fireworks Simulator, and I am excited. While some people dream of driving trucks or ploughing fields, I’ve always wanted dominion over colourful explosions. But it’s too expensive to get into as a hobby, and surely too niche a profession for a chancer to slip into, so here I’ve been waiting for Fireworks Simulator. Picking my own music, selecting my favourite fireworks, and timing them all together for one building celebration of combustion sounds wonderful.
I mean, obviously I intend to recreate one of my favourite things in this world – when a fireworks display in San Diego went wrong and 7,000 fireworks that were intended to be launched over 17 minutes went off in about thirty seconds, as seen in this extraordinarily loud video.
Once my computer recovers from that particle-o-rama, gosh, the possibilities! It’s basically one big sequencer, where we drag-and-drop fireworks to go off as we please. And firework shows are careful choreography – with colours, sounds, music, and patterns, they rise, they fall, they crash, they roll. A careful fireworks show is a beautiful thing to behold.
And yes, of course I want to reinterpret songs I like as fireworks displays. I’ll not bore you with my plans, with thinly-veiled boasts of “oh look at how cool and eclectic my musical tastes are”. This is about fireworks, not me.
A launch discount brings Fireworks Simulator down to £5.94 on Steam