Freeware Garden: The Coop Times

True story.

You have been prepared by Does Canned Rice Dream Of A Napkin Heap?, but the time has come to show off your skills of upward mobility. Stop telling aliens stories for a mere plate of food and start writing for The Coop Times for a decent and honest living.

The Coop Times, besides being a fictional newspaper run by an eternally disappointed editorial committee, is a wonderful little web game by Linebreak Collective that aims to once again get those creative fluids running by having you write.

You play as a ’50s styled journalist complete with typewriter and an inexhaustible supply of cigarettes, whose job is to write news articles. You’ll be shown a very brief prompt, memorize its key details and then start typing. Manage five coherent lines before the dreaded deadline catches up with you, quickly press enter, add an appropriately catchy title and your stuff will be published here, for everyone to read.

Fail to be fast enough and you’ll be fired. No more writing for esteemed publications for you and no more struggling to come up with something decently spelled when you can’t delete a single letter you typed.

Still, creative writing with arcade gaming restrictions is a fantastic little something you really have to try at least once, if only to contribute to a wonderfully odd anthology of online stories. You’ll be surprised at what you can accomplish under pressure.

9 Comments

  1. Premium User Badge

    Harlander says:

    The content already produced by this is…

    It’s… it’s certainly something.

  2. Monggerel says:

    “FUCK YOU I WONT DO WHAT YOU TELL ME” is a pretty strong headline, I gotta say.

  3. Premium User Badge

    Bluerps says:

    It took some tries to figure out that the game won’t let me type a ‘ for some reason (it looses focus when I try that), but after I found that out I managed to finish an opinion piece about youths and how they take too many drugs and aren’t god-fearing enough.

    Man, being a writer is easy!

  4. DrScuttles says:

    Finally I can publish all my ridiculous thoughts, dreams and fanciful notions and no-one can stop me.

  5. Hmm-Hmm. says:

    This is really really hard for me. Then again, I tend to ponder a lot and just making stuff up like that is not my thing. Therefore, lousy game, obviously.

  6. April March says:

    Is the fact that backspace doesn’t work a bug or is it meant to be part of the challenge?

    • April March says:

      Actually the fact that it opens Firefox’ find in page function whenever I try to type an apostrophe makes me think it’s a bug. Possibly.

      • 2HitAdam says:

        Hey, dev speaking here. First: thanks for playing! The backspace thing is intentional because typewriters don’t come with that luxury haha. I could have put dashes through letters on backspace, I guess, but I like the ‘accept mistakes were made and just keep writing’ mode it pushes players into without them.

        The apostrophe thing definitely isn’t intentional though, thanks for flagging that! Wasn’t aware Firefox did that…

    • MrFinnishDude says:

      Well, you are typing on a typewriter with a 30 something second deadline.