Stuff Wot I Have Played Yesterday

I have been using this stock photo professionally for almost six years. I treat it like a woodworker does a prized plane handed down through the generations. I want to say a former co-worker found it in a PC Gaming Alliance report?

As I lamented yesterday that I’d spent the working morning playing games I probably wouldn’t write about, Alec suggested that I stick ’em all together into one short post. Hey, that’s a good idea!

I play a load of small games every day, and most of them are free, but I only end up writing posts about a few. So here’s what I played yesterday morning, from wandering a labyrinthine hotel to leading a jazz band in a rhythm-based beat ’em up.

Circle of Fifths [Game Jolt] by Alexander Howard, Max Wilhemi, Travis Nichols, and Donald Li
Free

I really dig the idea of playing a beat ’em up as a five-piece jazz band, rolling down the street en masse flinging notes at burly blokes. Attacking and moving must be done in time with the beat, but I got too into the jazz spirit and was punished. I’m not really one for rhythm games, and I found the obnoxious string-twanging noise for mis-timing moves pushing me out of the grooving. It does otherwise look and sound quite pleasant though.

Hotel Paradise [Itch] by Kai Clavier
Pay-what-you-want

You hold in your hand the key to a room numbered between 1 and 999 and must find it. Unfortunately, the hotel has a seemingly illogical layout, a maze of corridors with random numbers, lined with banal art and piping in muzak. It is wearying. I hear that something unusual happens when you find your room, but I quit after wandering for ages then stumbling across room 666. It seemed a fitting enough end.

Sunset Spirit Steel [Itch] by Kitty Horrorshow
Pay-what-you-want

Explore an eerie mountain village, finding unsettling notes and strange singing sculptures.

Vapor [Game Jolt] by Jeron Braxton
Free

Explore a surreal landscape, admiring sculptures, listening to chill music, and leaping through portals. Also, you can fling arcing bridges by clicking, just because. Some parts are jolly pretty and relaxing, but sadly it runs so very slowly for me.

Your Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy Itch by Jun Shen
Free

“Is this Cara fanfic?” I asked of this Twine game at one point, reminded of her Sacrilege. No, her game about drinking and dancing and flirting and sexualintercoursing didn’t have a path leading to an all-action karate-kicking ending.

26 Comments

  1. Alice O'Connor says:

    Er, it occurs to me now that this might look like it’s supposed to be replacing Freeware Garden. It really isn’t – it couldn’t. This is me trying to turn several hours of playing into a post.

    • Asurmen says:

      That sounds suspiciously like an ordinary 9-5 office job and having to justify to your manager why you’ve spent the past few hours with a thumb up your arse.

      You gaming journalists get all the best excuses.

      • CookPassBabtridge says:

        Getting ones thumb up ones arse would take an enormous amount of flexibility, would it not?

        I am hoping that in writing this comment many people will now be attempting to sit on their own hand in order to emulate said position (minus actual bottom prodding of course).

        • TacticalNuclearPenguin says:

          You mean minus the fun? That’s a bit silly to ask.

        • Max Planck says:

          It isn’t difficult at all. I’m certainly not very flexible and I’m typing this with one hand.

        • April March says:

          Agreed. Cook, you might want to make an appointment with an orthopedist. You ain’t bending right.

        • Samwise Gamgee says:

          Difficulty is directly related to the amount of lube applied

    • Jakob91 says:

      Hey Alice.. just out of curiosity; is the game Ferrari 355 Challenge on the top picture?

  2. KaiUno says:

    Weird lady is playing split-screen all by her lonesome and yelling at herself through the internet? Women, amirite?

    • Mechorpheus says:

      If you look REALLY closely it’s actually that she’s driving under a bridge, not split-screen. Although why anyone would try and play a car racing game with a joystick is beyond me.

      • CookPassBabtridge says:

        Depends how old it is. I know I am ruining the joke but I always played racing games on my Amiga with a joystick. However I am guessing this picture is more of the “what the journalist / photographer / model believed video gaming to look like”. Cue references to 10 meg pipe etc.

    • Nihilist says:

      I’m mesmerized since I saw it. It’s like a message from a strange parallel world. Eerie.

    • frogmanalien says:

      That’s what you saw in that picture? I couldn’t get past the CD (not DVD) cases for the (presumably) games, CRT monitor and lack of keyboard. She’s in forth place in the race too so needn’t be quite so upset (although playing a racing game with joystick would definitely bring out any anger inside of me)…

    • apa says:

      But which game and track is it? Looks like she’s driving a formula 1 (or other open-wheeler). And why is she braking that hard on a straight? Probably locking brakes too.

      • Jason Moyer says:

        The game is F355 Challenge by Sega, the track is Suzuka.

    • Prolar Bear says:

      For the record, that looks a lot like some Gran Turismo game. The bridge looks a lot like Suzuka, though I have no idea about the car. Hilarious.

      • Spacewalk says:

        That was my first assumption. The dials are console green and the numbers are laid out like console racer 101. Whatever it is, I’ll bet you it’s a game from 2002-2006.

        • defunct says:

          I have to agree that it’s an old, at *least* decade old, picture. What I’m wondering is, why did they choose to post a picture that is so obviously so old at this point? I can think of one or two reasons, none of which I want to speculate about in a public board. It’s like a time warp into the early 00s. It looks like it’s in 1024×768, too, which is sick.

    • twaitsfan says:

      I like that she’s got the stick all the way back. Trying to get liftoff apparently.

      • SlimShanks says:

        She also seems to think that it is a combat racer, based on how firmly the trigger is held down. She’s probably yelling because she’s making her own sound effects.

    • Jason Moyer says:

      How is she playing F355 Challenge (can’t tell which version it is) on a PC?

  3. Spacewalk says:

    I found two rooms in that prick of a hotel and that was enough for me. You get your own randomly generated room and a secret hint which isn’t worth being bored to sleep if you ask me unless you really like straightening crooked picture frames. I mean really like.

  4. Spacewalk says:

    Oh man, how much is creating bridges in Vapor like Rainbow Islands.

  5. Jade Raven says:

    I would just like to say that that title image is a truly amazing thing. Probably the best thing posted to RPS this week.

  6. JRHaggs says:

    I was half expecting The Static Speaks My Name in this little articlet. I would very much like to see the RPS take on that fucked up little game(?).

    Anyway, thanks as always for wading through these for us all.