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Star Wars: Rebel Assault Blasts On GOG

Zapbeams.

Star Wars: Rebel Assault is the series that made a younger me realise fancy technology doesn’t make a game fun or good. It looked like a movie! It had fancy pre-rendered 3D graphics! You sometimes controlled an actual real actor how could that even be! And it was a boring and janky rail shooter and yes I will fight you COME ON THEN.

You don’t need me to stomp all over nostalgia, mind. The two Rebel Assault games are now on GOG in a $9.99 (£6.50-ish) bundle, so you can see for yourself.

With a mix of pre-rendered backgrounds, FMV cutscenes, and FMV-ised real actors as game characters, Rebel Assault dances across the Star Wars movies. You get to blow up Star Destroyers, fly around on Hoth, and, yes, take the place of Luke Skywalker to blow up the Death Star yourself. Star Wars! And it’s rubbish and boring and clunky but heaven help me nostalgia is a heck of a drug.

Who am I to crush dreams? I can’t take your experiences away from you, and I wouldn’t want to. If you loved them, good for you, and I hope revisiting them brings you happiness.

Though I will defs for real irl fight you if you say that the rubbishness of MegaRace is not made at least tolerable by the squealing and gurning of FMV game show host Lance Boyle.

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Alice O'Connor

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When not writing news, Alice may be found in the sea.

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