I wince every time I see a motorbike game. One of my earliest assignments for The Distinguished Competition back in my magazine days was to review Moto Something 3, which I reluctantly agreed to do despite zero motorbike knowledge beyond that you burn your leg if you try to climb off the wrong side. In desperation about how to meet the wordcount, I opened the article with a made-up nonsense rhyme about motorbikes, reasoning that the extra linebreaks would fill more space. The editor questioned my sanity but left it in, to my horror. And so even just reading the name ‘MotoGP 15‘ has me consumed by self-loathing. Let’s see if I can find catharsis by posting about it, what with it being out today and everything.
Did you like it? If you pause and go through it frame by frame, I’m pretty sure you can see a motorbike at one point.
Here’s another one with a bit more in-game footage, showing off how it recreates recent real-life races:
And here are some important motorbike facts:
Motorbikes have two wheels and go quite fast.
Sometimes they are noisy.
You have to put on a lot of cowskin if you want to ride on one.
Johnny Blaze aka Ghost Rider rides a motorbike.
Wrek-Gar in Transformers turned into a sort of square, spiky, rubbish motorbike.
The Motorbike was invented by Ian Motorbike in 1492.
I would almost certainly die if I tried to ride a motorbike.
MotoGP15 is out now. I’m really sorry.