Clickhole’s Have A Low-Key Forest Adventure! Is A Laf

I like to think I know a thing or two about walking simulators – heck, I’ve even LARPed a few. So imagine my surprise when, within a minute of starting playing new walking simulator Have A Low-Key Forest Adventure! [official site], I had joined a biker gang and committed to a life of danger. Starting over, I strolled quietly through lush forest, pausing to stare at a rusty can and walking right past strange and spooky things – never stop by a cabin in the woods – until… I couldn’t help but listen to an old man weep over the thought of Johnny Cash being stung by a stingray. I’d failed again.

It is, you see, the latest text adventure from The Onion’s spin-off site Clickhole.

It’s awfully fun and pleasant and, yes, does have some lovely woodland scenes to enjoy. I don’t know quite how wild the walk can get, but it looks full of antics and diversions keeping you from your well-earned low-key walk.

I can’t – or won’t – say much more, so go on, click it. They name the site Clickhole, so click it.

4 Comments

  1. racccoon says:

    Oh, no! You used so much bug spray that you became a popular way for bugs to commit suicide. Thousands of bugs consume you, seeking to end their sad little lives. You have failed to have a low-key forest adventure. Sorry.

  2. Premium User Badge

    Grizzly says:

    Thhe truth about Clickhole’s “Have a Low-Key Forest Adventure” will shock you.

  3. Baggypants says:

    I made it though the first time but was crushed by a rock fall in a mine with all nude mining men when I tried again.

  4. Cinek says:

    Erm…. “Well, that’s great. Just great. Now you’re playing babysitter for a couple of toddlers whose parents are missing and maybe even dead. This is just about the least low-key thing imaginable. What even is this now? It’s not even an adventure anymore. It’s, like, a real-life situation. Jesus fucking Christ. Forget it. Forget this whole thing. It’s ruined.”