The Xbox One controller is the finest lump of gameplastic I’ve had the pleasure of using for appropriate virtuamurder, but on PC I’m confined to connecting it via a USB cable. That’s a bit old-timey, considering this is the 21st of October, 2015. Wires? Where we’re going, we don’t need wires!
We do need, however, need £24.99 to buy the new USB adapter allowing Xbox One controllers to work wirelessly with Windows 10. Great Scott! That’s a big price for a small doohickey. Why, to afford that I’d have to travel back to 1955 and hand Young Alice sports results from 1950 to the year 2000 so she could become rich off betting!
You’d think that’d be it, right? Place a load of bets, become rich, and buy a £25 doodad so my Xbox One controller can connect wireless with my Windows 10 PC (it doesn’t work with Windows 7 or 8, because reasons). Easy, right? Yeah, except she was never meant to have that knowledge so some total butthead will try to undo it and what then?
Given that the Xbox One controller has worked on Windows for over a year, this adapter does seem awfully late. Also, wireless isn’t enough. You mean you have to use your hands? That’s like a baby’s toy!
Dear Alice, if my calculations are correct you will receive this news post immediately after you saw the Xbox One controller struck by wireless. First let me assure you that I am alive and well. I’ve been living happily these past eight months in the year 1885. October 21st 2015? That was the day I went back… that was the day of the famous Edinburgh lightning storm. Manure! I hate manure! Relax Graham, it’s a sleep-induced alpha-rhythm generator. She was asking too many questions and no-one should know too much about their future. That accident caused a chain reaction of events which sent Alice’s life straight down the tube. What’s wrong O’Connor, chicken?