It’s The Secret RPS Office Christmas Party!

Ho ho ho and, might I say, wahey! Welcome to the secret RPS Office Christmas Party! While most of Team RPS converges upon The Smoke for the annual RPS festive feast – seventeen courses of date-stuffed newts, smoked larks, boiled owls, eel tongues, Horace steaks, iced parrot tears, etc. – Pip is in LA for LoL and I refuse to leave Scotland. So today, while they’re away, I’m hosting my own office party with my own office/flatmate, former RPS Senior Scottish Correspondent Cara Ellison.

We shall be merry (so very merry – devastatingly merry) as we bring you a half-planned, half-thought-through day of festivity and heck, you’re all invited too. Don’t worry: the bosses definitely aren’t looking.

“p.s. Kieron smells,” adds Cara. We’re already working on that merriness.


  1. Barchester says:

    But it’s early! And I’ve work to do. And there’s lunch to be had first. :(

  2. PoulWrist says:

    Oh dear :o

  3. VelvetFistIronGlove says:

    RPS Scotland office is the best RPS office.

  4. iainl says:

    I have to be devastatingly sober and work. I hate you all.

    (have fun!)

  5. Premium User Badge

    Adam Smith says:

    I am currently in the process of converging. Skies above watford junction are heavy with dark omens. I dined on a festive scotch egg before leaving (it was perhaps a bauble, studded with breadcrumbs and glassy in the throat) and intend to raise merry hell before the day is done.

    • Cara Ellison says:

      Adam you would be so proud of us! All that alcohol is ours. And we have a knitted Morrissey on top of the tree, moping it up.

      • Premium User Badge

        Adam Smith says:

        I am in the London! No sightings of Dickens, Darwin or old st Karl yet but it’s early days. I am hoping to make my fortune but may simply relax into the role of ‘plucky urchin no. 12’.

        Someone has built a dining balcony in Euston station, which seems a bit ott.

        • Cara Ellison says:

          Kick London for me, and tell it off a bit, and then say you think it needs a wash

        • Dingbatwhirr says:

          I was in Euston yesterday and, as an occasional visitor to London, felt the same confusion. Whence came this mysterious floating platform? And why can one not get a decent cup of tea atop it?

  6. mashkeyboardgetusername says:

    I like the way that Graham, supposedly the editor or summit, is still the junior Scottish RPSer.

  7. Tinus says:

    Horace :(

  8. DrollRemark says:

    Oh, this is going to be fun.

  9. rustybroomhandle says:

    Are we merry yet?

  10. Little_Crow says:

    This office party needs more cub reporter, Rab Florence

  11. shoptroll says:

    Our office party is today too!

    Welcome back Cara!

  12. thedosbox says:

    Who’s DJ’ing?

  13. Niente says:

    I was once drunk at the Edinburgh festival and had half and half induced dreams of a small stroppy man demanding I partake of ‘salt and shush’ on a deep fried something. It was both troubling and comforting.

  14. Jeremy says:

    Is that a bottle of green Cuervo? What is going on?

  15. Hmm-Hmm. says:

    I was planning to say to Pip to say hi to Cara, but since you’ve posted in the comments section, I’ll just do it directly and add: Have fun, everyone (or is it everybody? I forget)!

  16. Duke Flipside says:

    Yay for Scotland! I’m in Scotland, although I am not drinking, but I am on holiday so perhaps I should reconsider.

  17. JJRPIII says:

    Hi guys, sorry to bother you all but I thought I’d just drop in and see if anyone could confirm for me whether or not Kieron smells?

    • JJRPIII says:

      Wait, I just noticed that the OP already cleared this up.

      I should have known RPS would have covered all the pertinent issues already.

  18. Schlobo says:

    Wotcha playin at the office party??

  19. DevilishEggs says:

    I put hoot sauce on my owl burgers