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Tekken 7 brings bearbiffing to PC in June

Knuckle tattoo idea: G O O D  D O G S

The bear-knuckle biffing of Tekken 7 [official site] will arrive on June 2nd, Bandai Namco announced today. After 22 years (22!), the fighting game series will finally swing by PC. One might say it has ‘Tekken’ its time, if one were a punfaced git.

“But Alice,” you say, and I hear you saying it so don’t say you don’t because you do, “how will I understand the plot if I’ve missed Tekkens one through six?” Mate, having watched the new trailer I can tell you it’s all a load of tosh about bad dads, bears, a man who shouts zapbeams, a sexy lady spy from an ’80s B movie, Liberace, and an anime magical robogirl armed with a minigun, all throwing down.

Told you.

And I’m into that. As someone whose enthusiasm for B movies is such that last night they watched a chap cross the punky post-apocalyptic wasteland to salvage a new body for his sexbot after a blocked sink caused her to short out during kitchen coitus, this is about on my level.

The release date announcement (“hooray!”) also doubles as a DLC announcement (“sure?”). Bamco have announced a DLC season pass, which they say “will include new playable characters, new stages, a new game mode, costume packs, and a bonus 35-piece Metallic Costume Pack.” DLC will be sold separately too, of course.

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Alice O'Connor

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When not writing news, Alice may be found in the sea.

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