100ft Robot Golf stomps onto PC next week

Lay out your 50ft tartan trousers, your 40ft argyle jumper, and your 10ft leather glove, as 100ft Robot Golf [official site] is coming to PC next Thursday, March 16th. It’s the next game from No Goblin, the makers of silly spin ’em up Roundabout, and it is exactly what its name suggests. Huge robots will be playing golf across human cities, in oceans, on the moon, and all over the place, stomping and smashing buildings and screwing with each other. Following a PlayStation 4 debut last year, 100ft Robot Golf is coming to PC improved and fancied-up.

I dig those golfing robots. The golf is playable in real-time or turn-based, against AI or people, split-screen or online, wrapped up in commentary from the Internet’s McElroy brothers (I’m led to believe they invented the word ‘boy’?) and shonky ’90s anime cutscenes.

Console reviews seemed pretty down on it but maybe all the improvements coming with the PC release will help.

No Goblin say they’ve rewritten the AI to be feel human, partly because they play smarter and partly because they’ll wantonly destroy things and come after you if you’re in their way. They’ve fancied the graphics up too, from more-detailed destruction to prettier water. Also in are keyboard and mouse support, and so many graphics options you can make it look ’90s if you really want.

100ft Robot Golf is coming to Windows via Steam on Thursday. Fingers crossed. Shoulders loose. Back straight. Knees relaxed. Hips out. Hands clapped. Jaw clenched.


  1. Eleven says:

    That trailer was kind of odd without any sound effects. Eighties cartoons have trained me to believe that a 100ft robot should be making an explosion or whoosh or some kind of SFX at all times, and the lack is slightly creepy.

    Those character portraits are pretty spiffy!

  2. gwop_the_derailer says:

    Talking of the McElroy Brothers, I never knew Lin-Manuel Miranda was a MBMBaM fan!

    • Premium User Badge

      subdog says:

      He does his “Great Job” beeping car horn gesture pretty much every time someone puts a camera on him, in reference to this:

    • DelrueOfDetroit says:

      There is a straight up reference to MBMBaM in Hamilton where they do an “Unless?” “Unless!”

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    subdog says:

    I’ve considered buying a PS4 to play this, just because I am cursed to walk this earth consuming every piece of media the McElroy brothers produce.