It’s almost Easter, a holiday which is all about a dead man getting out of his pit and sauntering around like there’s nothing wrong. Well, we have another ghostly tale for you this week in our round-up of free games. A first-person horror story so spine-chilling that you won’t feel comfortable while alone in your own apartment for years to come. A fear so instinctive and gripping that you will be unable to look at any living room or toilet bowl the same way again.
I’m Still Here by Cosy Game Pals
Horrifying horror. You’ve just moved into a new house and are stacking away your books when something strange starts happening. You are not alone. The apartment is a dark place, the night offers no help, you are trapped in a building with something you simply cannot comprehend, a being of such ill portent and malice that it gives rise to only to a deep primordial terror within. How can such fear be conquered, how can unknowable phantasms like this be overcome?
Oh, right. Just search for help on Wahoo Answers.
Zen Painter by kartik2D
Chilled out brush strokes. The painting tools offered with this small blank canvas behave a wee bit differently to your MS Paint or your Photo n’ Shop. It’s all about controlled strokes, easing up on the pressure, keeping things cool, taking your time. I managed to create the vague semblance of a leafless tree on a hill after many attempts, but I’m sure someone with both more patience and talent could produce something at least 1.5 times better-looking.
4ever Transit Authority by Turnfollow
Aimless bus-riding in supercolourvision. You just sit on a bus and look out the window at the city streets rolling by. Tower blocks, avenues, trees, office buildings, passing cars. Then click on the hexagon if you like the name of the next stop to transfer to another bus line. Choose your next ride and go again with a set of bright new colours. Lime green, steel blue, inside-of-your-eyelid red. Just, like, sit on the bus, you know.
Micro Murder (But They’re Robots So It’s OK) by Tic Tac Toad
“Ballistic extermination for 1 or 2 tactical modules”. The devs of this have made a Wormslike on the Pico-8 console, which is one of the best uses for the pixelly homebrewing machine I can think of. Fight 4v4 battles of microbot warfare, with cluster bombs, grenades, “nukes” and digger guns (these fire a projectile that ploughs through the landscape like a ravenous gopher). There are four maps and it even lets you adjust the wind strength before the match, from calm to stormy. There’s a bit of a knack to figuring out the controls (panning the camera, selecting a weapon and firing that weapon are all governed by holding the Z key and following up with an arrow key) but they have a helpful diagram on the game’s page for anyone who gets lost. The classic petty feuds of our annelid friends have a fond tribute in this android murderfest.
More Human Than Human Resources by Spindle Games
Humanity testing apparatus. Ever wondered if you’d survive the opening cross-examination of Blade Runner when put in the Replicant’s shoes? No, neither had I. That wouldn’t happen. But if you’re the curious sort you might enjoy taking a Voight Kampf test of your own. Muddle through the responses to questions about mewling cats and calfskin wallets, while trying your damnedest not to insult your poor mother. Break the illusion of humanity and it’s retirement time for you, unless those super-human reaction times of yours are up to snuff (don’t worry, they will be).
Howard Phillips Lovecar by Kurki Collective
Top-down cultist prevention. The Great Old Ones are back at it with their filthy cultists working to summon them and bring y’all to an end. As a powerful car you need to roll around killing these peons before they can form a summoning circle and bring the big lads into being. If you fail, there’s a whole new tentacled target for you to worry about. Shoot the shotgun out one side of the car and the tommy gun out the other side. Blow the boyos away or just drive over them with all the fury of a detective who is sick to death of these cults.
Dog Petting Sim 2017 by T-Dog eXtreme
Keep petting the dog.