Playerunknown’s Battlegrounds dev mutters about movie

Once a game reaches a certain level of fame and fortune, its makers can get funny ideas. Out of nowhere, they start muttering about how their game could also be an esport. And a comic book. And a cartoon. And hell, a movie. Let’s make a movie. Let’s do this. We’re going to Hollywood, baby. Tragically, some of these ‘video game movies’ have actually been made. Well, Playerunknown’s Battlegrounds is still at the start of this journey, as its makers have only just begun dreaming of the silver screen. But PUBG Corp do think their 100-player stag & hen Battle Royale totally could be a movie. Not wanting to miss out, I’ve started writing a script to pitch.

PUBG Corp’s CEO, Chang Han Kim, raised these daft ideas in an interview with InvenGlobal. Asked about the future of Bluehole Studio’s splinter studio, he said:

“I’d like PUBG to become a universal media franchise based on the game. We want to take part in diverse industries including Esports, movies, drama, cartoons, animation, and more. In fact, we received a couple of love calls from a number of developers in Hollywood and Netflix. Our dream is to build a new game-based culture through various ways like this, and have the lead of that culture.”

Awful. I adore the game–and our Graham’s official Playerunknown’s Battlegrounds review is glowing too– but, aside from digital sports, this all sounds terrible. They’re not firm plans, to be clear, just ideas and dreams. Many developers have muttered similar foolishness before without getting anywhere.

However, if someone does go ahead and make a terrible Plunkbat movie, I’d kick myself if I didn’t at least try to grab some of that Tinseltown lucre. Here’s a peek at my script:

EXT. ERANGEL — FIELD — DAY

CHAD, box of fried chicken in hand, walks through the field towards BRAD. He steps over bodies, splashes in puddles of blood, kicks rifles out of his way, treads lightly across a patch of still-glowing embers, and pauses to pry a bottle of painkillers out of one corpse’s hand. CHAD reaches BRAD, who is sat upon a bale of hay clutching his head, and offers the box and bottle.

BRAD
You know what they say: winner winner, chicken- aw man, my head. What did we even do last night?

CHAD looks down at the text on his t-shirt–“BEST MAN”–and frowns.

INSERT: CHAD and BRAD, arm in arm, stumble out of an aeroplane door and down the stairs to the tarmac.

CHAD
I remember that we got the morning flight because it was £30 cheaper. And that we spent that £30 on miniatures off the trolley.

INSERT: CHAD and BRAD stand upright inside a taxi, their shouting heads out the windows, until the angry driver pulls over and shoos them out.

CHAD
But the taxi broke down so we had to walk.

INSERT: CHAD and BRAD enter the hotel bar and are greeted by a cheering crowd of lads. Each is wearing a t-shirt bearing the title “CHODD’S FINAL TOUR”, CHODD’s visage, and one listed date: “Erangel – March 23”.

CHAD
By the time we reached the hotel, Chodd and the lads had arrived and we were already three drinks behind the groom. After catching up, we hit the first club.

INSERT: CHAD and BRAD and CHODD are jumping up and down, arms linked, in a rammed club. A neon sign overhead reads “PLAYERUNKNOWN’S BOTTLEGROUNDS”.

CHAD
But from there.

INSERT: The sweaty mass of CHAD, BRAD, and CHODD bumps into a hen party, spilling the BRIDE’s drink over her sash. The HENS scowl and clench their fists.

CHAD
It gets hazy.

BRAD pats around his own back.

BRAD
Am I wearing a parachute?

TITLE CARD: “PLUNKBAT: ORIGINS”

Call me, Brendan.

21 Comments

  1. Crusoe says:

    Businessman first, player of games… well, not at all.

  2. TychoCelchuuu says:

    This is a good try but Walt Williams’s script is superior, I think. Since this has “franchise” written all over it, I suppose there’s no reason to choose. Plunkbat movies until the end of time!

  3. SecondSince says:

    Oh you mean like link to imdb.com ?

  4. Ghostwise says:

    Laaads !

  5. R. Totale says:

    Already working on my Chad/Brad slashfic

  6. ninjapirate says:

    A movie based on a game (mode) that’s based on a movie. That’s a first, isn’t it?

    • LennyLeonardo says:

      I mean, Tomb Raider?

      • lglethal says:

        Wait what? The Tomb Raider games definitely came out before the Tomb Raider movie. Which movie are you thinking Tomb Raider (the game) is based on? Indiana Jones?

  7. April March says:

    PlayerUnknown’s BottleGrounds. That’s it. I am dead. Bury me.

    • wraithgr says:

      Funnily enough, there are rumored to be two different types of plunkbotting and only one of them involves booze…

  8. Godwhacker says:

    Needs a thirty minute shot of a man hiding in a bathroom with a gun pointed at the door.

  9. Enko says:

    The movie leaked early on youtube:

    link to youtube.com

    Watch it before it gets taken down!

  10. sharpmath says:

    Alice this is amazing thank you.

  11. M0dusPwnens says:

    This sounds suspiciously like the start of a nefarious plot to normalize and promote plunkbat to the point where they can get away with hosting real-life Battle Royale.

  12. sneetch says:

    A movie? For a game with no characters? No plot? A game with no real… substance to it at all? What next? Solitaire the movie?

    At least there’s no story or canon to get in the way. Wait, there’s no story or canon to get in the way! At least that means no people complaining that Ryan Gosling was a terrible choice for player #76 as he obviously would have been far better cast as player #23!

    Gonna be a box office hit!

    • screechfox says:

      Hey, at least I can kind of see what kind of narrative you could build around a PUBG film. (I mean, it’s the exact same narrative that so many other films have done, but y’know.)

      So PUBG is at least a better movie candidate than Tetris, which is getting a whole sci-fi trilogy, I’ll give it that.

    • Premium User Badge

      phuzz says:

      A movie version of Solitaire? That makes about as much sense a a movie version of Battleships.

      Oh wait.

      (And that got turned into two videogames in case you thought there was some end to the ridiculousness)

  13. thesoupcan says:

    Movie based on a game thats based on a movie thats based on a comic series?
    Cant wait to watch 2 hours of a guy lying between grasses and then getting shot by someone he couldnt see!