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Steam Charts: Subnautica Edition

Subnautica

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Aw MAN! Just when I’d started up a great new running gag for the appearance of GTA V in the charts, this week it’s fallen out! And Divinity: Original Sin 2 has finally failed to make the grade for the first time this year. However, you’ll be relieved to learn CS:GO and Plunkles don’t let us down and wearily continue their infinite reigns.

Meantime, there’s quite a nice mixture of fresh and more recently popular scattered within.

10. My Time At Portia

My time at My Time At Portia was spent toward the end of last year, when I discovered they were going to have to put an awful lot more in before it was ready for early access. It was so flaky and empty I opted not to even write about it.

Hopefully its appearance here is an indication that by this month’s release it was far more ready, and it’s receiving very positive user reviews. Time to take another look, it seems. If I can find a way to stop playing Subnautica.

9. Human: Fall Flat

My investigation into the mysterious sudden success of this year-and-a-half-old indie continues. It’s spent a solid month in the top 10 now, despite adding its crowd-pleasing multiplayer back in November. Some have suggested it’s due to sudden interest in China, others that the developer’s mums are buying it by the thousands*, but the answer isn’t clear.

I’ve chased down the devs, and trying to fight past their peculiarly thick wall of PR and publisher, am hopefully getting some answers back soon. Sometimes I stop playing Subnautica long enough to check my emails.

*it’s me who’s suggesting this

8. ELEAGUE 2018 Boston CS:GO Major Championship Mega Bundle

Yes, that’s right! You, yes YOU, can get a whole bunch of imaginary stickers for the groups of other people who play a game you like, for the low, low price of just £7.69!

Don’t hold back in spending your actual real money on pretend stickers that aren’t tangibly extant for an esport event you didn’t go to and probably didn’t get around to watching! The Boston CS:GO Major finished yesterday, and I feel absolutely certain that one of the teams almost definitely won – who knows, it wasn’t Subnautica. Don’t wear their sticker with pride, since the sticker you’re paying for doesn’t actually exist! Don’t delay!

7. Counter-Strike: Global Offensive

ZZZZZZZZZZZ(Subnautica)ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

6. Slay The Spire

One by one, RPS is falling for Slay The Spire. First it was Adam, then Brendan, Graham, and now Alice and Matt, all wearily crawling into the Treehouse of a morning complaining about late nights and unfair bosses.

I shall protect myself in a shell of Subnautica such that no other game may get in. This way I shall survive and once again take over RPS as my own.

5. Total War: WARHAMMER II – Rise Of The Tomb Kings

I’ve checked, and checked again, but the idiotically titled Total War: WARHAMMER II – Rise Of The Tomb Kings does not feature any sequences of exploring under the sea to locate fishies and rare metals.

Thus, I am completely dumbfounded why anyone is playing it. But playing it they are, and apparently it’s quite good.

3 & 4. Dragon Ball FighterZ

You are reading about Dragon Ball FighterZ. You are happily reading about it, and not complaining that I’m writing about another game. You will buy Subnautica and play it for all time.

You will dive. Dive deep into your wallets and buy Subnautica. Subnautica is the game you want. Play Subnautica.

You are happy with this entry about Dragon Ball FighterZ and it has met all your needs.

2. Subnautica

Never heard of it.

1. Plunkbat

In a very Our Way To Fall by Yo La Tengo mood of late.

PS. Subnautica.

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