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Mordhau players are playing cricket with shields for balls and I love them

You never know what you’re going to see on a Mordhau duel server. People dress as Shreks and gnomes. Others hold up their arms in eternal ‘come at me’ gestures, constantly braying rather than fighting. I once joined a server where everyone wielded lightsabers and force-jumps. It’s a weird frontier.

Sadly, I have never hopped into a server full of people playing cricket using shields as balls and staffs as bats. Happily, someone else has, and there is video.

We’ve nearly perfected Mordhau Cricket in the oceanic duel servers. from r/Mordhau

That’s Reddit user PTEGrizzly, on a fast track to the big leagues. The Mordhau cricket big leagues don’t exist yet but they clearly should.

They even have uniforms! Kind of. Like everything about Mordhau cricket, they’re a bit of a mess. It’s a muddle of screams and raucous laughter, where some of the fielders zip around pretending to be aeroplanes while others take turns whacking a nearby corpse. You can see the wicketkeeper using an emote to show they’re ready, re-purposing the “please don’t hit me” gesture. That’s probably my second favourite part, closely followed by everyone erupting into violence the moment the round ends.

I’m already planning sports of my own. Is tennis possible? Badminton? Dodge-targe? Watch this space.

I once dubbed Hammondball the apotheosis of esports, but this is fierce competition.

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Matt Cox

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Matt is the founding member of RPS's youth contingent. He's played more games of Dota than you've had hot dinners.

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