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John Walker

1 day ago

Feature: Monstrous

Steam Charts: Entirely Original Edition

OK! OK! Look, thank you, yes, yes, I know, thank you. Yes, it's very exciting that I'm here with this week's Steam Charts, but come on, please, sit down now, that's really enough. Oh, come on, all of you, you're lovely, but it's only little me. Goodness gracious!

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6 days ago

Feature: Possessing

Unavowed review

Unavowed is unquestionably one of the most impressive point and click adventures made in many, many years. It's of a scale I wasn't at all expecting, with layer upon layer of complexity and variety in a way the genre has genuinely never seen before. It's also a darned fine yarn of demonic battling across the streets of New York, that tells its story in a…

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1 week ago

Feature: Recharted territory

Steam Charts: Life Changing Edition

Welcome to the Award Winning Steam Charts! Yes, you heard that right! I wrote "Award Winning"! It hasn't technically won any awards, but since everyone can agree it should have, it seems like it would almost be lying not to write it. But enough about how bloody brilliant I am, here are the top grossing games on your Steams this week.

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2 weeks ago

Feature: It's no one's fault but your own

Steam Charts: There Are Consequences Edition

Words are ill-equipped to describe how dull this week's Steam Charts truly are. Read on to see how I combat that. But also, thank goodness there's at least the interesting feature that Plunkbat has, for the first time since it shot to the top of the charts on its release, dropped to third place. Its year-long grip on the top spot was beginning to waver…

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3 weeks ago

Feature: Appears to be good

Semblance review

It must be such a marvellous moment when you realise you've struck upon a great idea for a game. It must be sublime when you realise you also have the technical ability to realise it. That applies for Semblance, a cute-n-complicated puzzle platformer in which your character can bish and bosh and bash into the platforms to reshape them.

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4 weeks ago

Feature: Partial Recall

Far Cry 5 – Lost On Mars review

Far Cry 5 continues Ubisoft's on-paper rather charming habit of adding DLC to its games that completely transforms them into something else. Vietnam-themed Hours Of Darkness rather passed us by, but Lost On Mars joined us last week so I thought I'd take a look. It's... it's really bloody awful.

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Feature: My personal torment

My, er, friend is finding To Hell With Hell rather difficult

A question for you: What should one do when one is reviewing a game, but it's far, far too hard for one to get anywhere in? I'm asking for a friend. A friend who's reviewing the early access for To Hell With Hell (THWH), a pixelly bullet hell roguelite that's tough as really bloody tough nails.

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Feature: Head held high

GNOG review

We've been writing about crazy-bonkers puzzler GNOG in its various forms since 2014. Originally called GNAH!, Graham immediately loved the look of it. Then a year later developers KO_OP Mode declared that they were scrapping everything and starting over, renaming the game GNOG. Since then we've been patiently waiting, seeing the game come out on iOS, then PS4, and finally now it's out on PC.…

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Feature: Steamy Windows

Steam Charts: Moderately Entertaining Edition

Hello! Goodness me, it's good to have you with us. If you're reading this sentence on Steam, then I simply implore you to click through to the site to read what has been described by Simon Pulitzer as "the greatest games journalism the world has ever been blessed to receive."

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1 month ago

Feature: Tied down

The Free Ones review

I'm easily pleased. Just adding a grappling hook to a game automatically increases its overall worth by 31%. So when I saw The Free Ones has leaping and grappling and swooping and jumping, I was in. Set in a world where a group of enslaved humans are escaping an unseen enemy, you are equipped with a special glove that allows you to latch on to…

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Feature: Something's fishy

Steam Charts: Perfectly Normal Edition

Welcome to my nightmares. As chronicled last week, all human progress is wiped out by a Steam Sale. Where once we were a species that revelled in new, interesting ideas, pursuing our dreams, we are once more wedged neck-deep in the past, doomed to buy the same £40 five-year-old games until we rot and coagulate into a molten horror. Welcome to the Steam Charts!

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Feature: Smashing

Wreckfest is a splendid antidote to po-faced racing sims

I am not one who subscribes to the school of games criticism where each game is compared to others in its field. Firstly, because you may as well just plot the game on a graph for all the lack of detail and nuance this provides, and secondly because to be meaningful it really depends upon the reader's having a working knowledge of every other game.…

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Feature: Always-off

Trying, and failing, to find the multiplayer in The Crew 2

My plan was to tell you all about The Crew 2's multiplayer. Last week I reviewed it as a single-player game, because the servers had yet to be populated, and indeed because I at no point encountered any option to actually take part in any. Despite being an 'always on' game, that immediately disconnects you from playing should your internet connection drop, and logs you…

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Feature: Marsterful

Red Faction Guerrilla Re-Mars-tered review

T'was 2009 that Red Faction Guerrilla first appeared, an astoundingly ballsy and destructive Martian open world game before everything was open world games. And goodness gracious, it was fantastic. You played as a freedom fighter for the Red Faction, rebelling against the terrible authoritarian energy company EDF, who control the populations of Mars. And your tasks primarily involve knocking things over.

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Feature: Set sale for savings!!!!!!!!!

Steam Charts: Stale Of The Century Edition

I have reached a conclusion. Everything that's bad is the fault of Steam sales. Two weeks ago these charts had reached a place of being a fertile ground of interesting new games and discounted classics. Today, they're back to being mostly a miserably predictable list of games that even the undiscovered tribes of Papua New Guinea have on their Steam accounts.

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2 months ago

Feature: Driving the nail in

The Crew 2 as a single-player game review

The Crew 2 is out proper tomorrow, at which point its servers will probably collapse for a bit, then eventually get stable as players fill up the vast amount of empty space in this miniaturised rendition of the United States. Meanwhile, I've been playing it this week to experience its vast amount of solo content, which is undeniably the focus of the game's core progression.…

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Feature: The long development arm of the law

Police Stories is coming along nicely, but taking its time

When I last played Police Stories, I was pretty delighted by how much the two level alpha had to offer. So it was with somewhat mixed feelings that a year later I found myself playing a four level alpha - this feels like slow progress, albeit it with a graphical overhaul. And yet I am just as captured and occupied by the levels it has,…

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