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Nic Reuben

2 days ago

Chippy is a new twin-stick bullet hell from the devs behind Rust

Facepunch Studios - them behind Garry's Mod, Clatter, and Rust - have just released Chippy, a minimalist, colourful twin-stick bullet hell shoot 'em up. Can a bullet hell really be called minimalist? I guess that leaves more room for the actual bullets. I'm also guessing it makes some space for all these gigantic bosses Facepunch have left lying around everywhere. I probably could have tacked…

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Toonstruck, starring Christopher Lloyd, is free on GOG

Star-stuffed nineties adventure game Toonstruck is as free as a bird, now, and this bird you can grab in the GOG sale. Go on. Grab that bird. Hold it in your powerful fists. That thing's ancestors were dinosaurs, don't you know? You have basically captured and now have total power over a dinosaur. You have not only outlived every T-Rex to ever exist, but now…

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Starbound adds bounty hunters with banana heads, rare new monsters

Starbound yesterday launched a new update, and it features bounty hunters with giant bananas for heads. The last bounty I hunted ended in a brutal massacre the likes of which that outback desert town had never seen. You thought I was going to make a cute joke about chocolate, didn't you? Do not cross me, vagrant. Instead, take in a light spot of the trailer…

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Wasteland remaster looks a whole lot like a remake, and I’m not complaining

The Wasteland is a lawless place, son. We don't have time for fun and games, and we especially don't have time to worry about stretching everyday industry vernacular to its absolute limits. InXile Entertainment's remaster of the original Wasteland - which was announced back in June 2018 - seem have locked the word 'remaster' in a barrel of nuclear waste for a few decades, rubbing…

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Tales Of Arise looks gorgeous, has a big flaming stompy thing in it

Man is a complicated beast. I, for example, like to complain about not having any good JRPGs to play whilst shamefully ignoring the Tales Of series, which many anime-curve connoisseurs I know consistently tell me is excellent.  That may all change with Tales Of Arise. The announcement at E3 only showed a smidgen of action, but what it did show was pretty enough to get…

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Per Aspera lets you build a colony on Mars, without useless humans holding you back

There's a metaphysical thought experiment I like called The Ship of Theseus, which I'm not going to explain to you because a.) I'm sure you already know it and b.) It's casual Friday, not played-out philosophy Friday. That is next week. Anyway, this concept seems to have a legacy in Per Aspera, a story-stuffed strategy offering from Tlön Industries and Raw Fury, about terraforming the planet Mars…

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3 days ago

I’m a big fan of these goblin lads from upcoming JRPG Oninaki

Do you ever get sold on a game purely on the strength of how its enemies look? I'm sure this happens to me a lot, but just off the top of my head, Killzone, XCOM, and Dark Souls all first got my attention this way. The trailer for Oninaki - an upcoming, classic-style JRPG from the I Am Setsuna and Lost Sphear gang at Square Enix's Tokyo RPG…

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12 Minutes is Groundhog Day with more murder but less Bill Murray

The trailer for 12 Minutes opens on a tangibly moody, dimly lit scene of a woman and her husband, who then proceeds to use his knowledge of the future to correctly guess the contents of the elegantly-wrapped gift she's just plopped on the table. I have to say, this is generally one of the more dickheadish things you could use your powers of foresight for.…

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Conan Chop Chop is real, and its brain spiders can get in the bin, then into a volcano

Conan Chop Chop is real. It's a cutesy dungeon crawler with 1-4 player co-op.  Mighty Kingdom made it, Funcom are publishing it. It'll be out around September. Good. Fine. Good. Can we talk about these horrible leggy brain things in this picture I found please. What? Why? How do they even feed? Do they have telekinetic powers like the Brain Bugs in Starship Troopers? If…

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If this very good boy from the new Blair Witch game survives, I will give you all a fiver

"You enter a forest, and things go wrong." That's the basic concept behind the upcoming Blair Witch game, a first person horror title from Layers of Fear and Observer developers Bloober Team. It's an original story taking place in what Bloober call the 'Blair Witch universe'. Which, as universes go, has definitely got the 'creepy forest' biome down pat. From the demo footage below it…

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4 days ago

Zombie Army 4: Dead War pits four players against Cloud Hitler, the hitler made of clouds

Reveal trailers are funny things. Sometimes, they flawlessly showcase the brilliance of the game in question. Sometimes they show you absolutely nothing. And sometimes, they end with a crimson-tinted smog effigy of Hitler laughing at you from the skyline. The reveal trailer for Zombie Army 4: Dead War is one of those ones. Have a butcher's below (I'm so sorry, that Watch Dogs game has…

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Vermintide II’s new versus mode lets you play as a bunch of absolute binlickers

I've yet to properly express my love of Vermintide II in these hallowed RPS tomes, so let me go right ahead and say it: Fatshark's four player co-op rodent basher is my favourite use of the Warhammer fantasy licence that's not the other one, and is undoubtedly one of the top ten ratmashers of all time.  Now, it looks set to get even squeakier with…

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Feature: Pull the other one

Devolver Bootleg review

What have those scoundrels at Devolver Digital gone and done now? Oh look, it’s Devolver Bootleg, a mixtape of the Punk IPA publisher's classics that someone left in their jeans pocket before a wash and now the musics all fuzzy and the track list is garbled nonsense. Also it’s one percent off, yeah, because screw…discounts? So, is this a delightful slice of performance-art-as-consumer-product brilliance? Or…

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Feature: Finally Fantasy, more like

The moment I’m most excited for in the Final Fantasy 8 remaster

Square Enix are but a fading spectre of their former glory. Square Enix can tie a crate of Final Fantasy trading cards to themselves and get in the sea. Square Enix are all horrible bastards who don’t understand what makes a good RPG anymore. Never again will I have to say any of these clearly untrue and potentially libellous phrases, because Square Enix - who…

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6 days ago

Feature: I lordRAN out of good puns already

What might the two biggest trolls in fantasy be cooking up with Elden Ring?

I once spent an entire week in a $6 Saigon hotel room doing basically nothing but eating Subway and reading dodgy pirate copies of the Game Of Thrones books -- we're talking copies where the text would occasionally bleed into the spine and some of the maps were upside down -- and it was the best. When I got back home, I played Dark Souls,…

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2 weeks ago

Feature: Crunchy houmous

Warhammer: Chaosbane review

Oi. Mate. See that skull? That is the skull of a demon who stood betwixt my axe whirling dwarf and a nice new pair of trousers, for I have been playing angry Topman visit simulator Warhammer: Chaosbane, a serviceable ARPG that’s a fair bit more interesting than Diablo 3 but probably slightly less interesting than a top end hand blender. Confused? Excellent. Let the merciless…

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4 weeks ago

Feature: The reviewening

Thea 2: The Shattering review

God does not play dice with the universe, I once read on a Mini Milk stick, but Thea 2’s pantheon of Slavic-inspired deities seem well up for a game of cards. You don’t play as a mortal in this hybrid strategy role-playing game, but an all-powerful entity guiding the life of a hapless schmo in their quest from wanderer to chosen hero of a blossoming…

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2 months ago

Feature: Jonesing for better

Pathway review

[To the tune of Indiana Jones.] Dun da da da / Dun da-da / There’s some nazis / In a jeep, oh no / And a boulder / Run away / Give my heart back / It’s my favourite organ. Ah, a classic theme for a classic series. And yet, the last Indiana Jones game I remember playing was a highly irritating Super Star Wars…

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Feature: Hiden knowledge

The 400-year-old shinobi manuals that definitely inspired Sekiro’s prosthetic tools

Ninjas love scrolls. It’s just a ninja thing, don’t ask. They refuse to read anything that hasn’t first been rolled up into scroll form so they can unroll it again and dramatically ponder its contents. Luckily for us, they left a few of these scrolls behind. In the interest of important ninja science, I took a look at some translations of these aged texts, such…

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3 months ago

Feature: Pack your bags

Outward review

Outward is the first game I’ve played to capture a feeling I remember from childhood. Waking up so early it's still dark outside, and being wide-eyed with wanderlust. I’ve always loved the hour before dawn, simultaneously blessed with twilight tranquility and electric with promise. It feels like stealing something from the sun, enacting some celestial heist to gain a foothold on the day. In this…

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