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Ark: Genesis

4 months ago

Feature: Dog eggs

Have You Played… ARK: Survival Evolved?

I had a mate at university who got home pissed at 2am and decided to boil himself an egg. Great idea at the time. But he passed out on the floor, the saucepan boiled dry, and the egg began to combust. When my mate woke up, it was because his whole building was being evacuated because of the billows of rancid egg smoke from his…

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9 months ago

Feature: Yabba dabba don't

ARK: Genesis review

It’s a little-known fact that the “ARK” in “ARK: Survival Evolved” is in fact short for “arsebark”. And that’s fitting, because that’s exactly what its latest DLC, Genesis, is like: a fart. And what a fart. Not an abrupt, spluttering guff, nor an undulating trouser howl that reduces its culprit to ever more contorted grimaces of shame as it continues. No, ARK: Genesis is a…

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Part one of Ark Genesis’ monstrous expansion is out now

Dinosaur survive 'em up Ark: Survival Evolved has always had one problem. Exactly, and only, one single game-breaking issue. Until now, you couldn't build a castle on the back of a colossal sea turtle. Shameful, really. But after numerous delays, Ark: Genesis's sea-bound houses finally arrived earlier this week. Now it's just a matter of finding someone to lend you planning permission for that shell.

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10 months ago

Ark: Genesis’ space-whaling turtle riders have been delayed into February

Ark: Genesis, the monstrous next expansion for Ark: Survival Evolved, has been delayed. Again. Well, half of it, at least. While the first bit of Ark's massive two-part expansion was set to embark last December, its release was later pushed back to January. This week, Studio Wildcard regret to inform us that we'll need to hold on a little longer before building a bungalow on…

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1 year ago

Ark: Genesis lets you build houses on giant sea turtles

Multiplayer dinosaur-riding island-surviv-a-thon series Ark: Survival Evolved has taken inspiration from my fever dreams and will be introducing giant sea turtles who double as islands which then double as an open construction site for your future home.The next chapter in the ongoing Ark saga, known as Ark: Genesis, will be made up of two hefty expansion packs. These will introduce tameable albeit shapeshifting animals -…

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