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Max Payne

12 months ago

Feature: Father bullet-time

Have You Played… Max Payne 3?

Have You Played? is an endless stream of game retrospectives. One a day, every day, perhaps for all time. The farther time drifts away from the release of Max Payne 3 [official site] the more I appreciate what Rockstar tried to do with it. I hated the idea when it was announced. “Max in Brazil? BALD?!? WITH A BEARD?!?!?!” I don't think I've ever been…

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1 year ago

3 years ago

It’s About Time: Quantum Break Coming To PC

Remedy (Max Payne, Alan Wake) have been making gorgeous, violent games about angry-sad men for years now. When they announced their latest, Quantum Break [official site], it was revealed as an Xbox One exclusive. Moments ago, they announced that the time-troubling action game will also be coming to PCs. As long as those PCs are running Windows 10. There's a proper trailer below, along with…

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Feature: Better than Stranglehold

Have You Played… Max Payne Kung Fu 3.0 Mod?

Have You Played? is an endless stream of game recommendations. One a day, every day of the year, perhaps for all time. Max Payne was a fine game all on its own, but the one thing to make its slow-motion bullet-dodging better was kung fu. That arrived in the form of the appropriately named Kung Fu mod, which added a combo system of spin kicks…

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Feature: Bestest Biffs

The 25 Best Action Games On PC

You probably like action games. But which ones should you like best?! We've narrowed it down to 25, and then put them in the unimpeachably correct order. Read on for details of the best action biff-zap-collect-me-do gaming you can stuff down your trousers.

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6 years ago

Your Guide To All The Max Payne 3 Rumours

For months now, the internet has been buzzing with speculation about what secrets forthcoming man-shooting game Max Payne 3 might contain. So very many questions are left to be answered by this third part of the epic, twisting saga of shooting a lot of men in the face in slow motion, and we've had to wait long, agonising years to discover how it all ends.…

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7 years ago

The Animated Agony Of Max Payne 3

Good morning! I became sick and (didn't) almost perish but now I'm back and, my, what tumultuous events I missed in my absence. When I saw the news that Max Payne 3 had been delayed I fell backwards out of my chair in slow motion, pumping round after round of screaming lead through my monitor in anguish and fury while simultaneously having and not having…

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Rockstar Threatens Max Payne 3 “Barrage”

Can digital information really constitute a barrage? I don't know, but I'm scared. Barrages sound nasty to me, but Rockstar have pledged to send a barrage of Max Payne 3 info at us over "the coming weeks and months." I've looked at the first missive from their asset-cannon, and it's only some screenshots rather than gunshot or a disease-riddled corpse, so I think we're safe…

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8 years ago

Max Paynekillers: Ex-Cop Back Off The Wagon

Is Max Payne back on drugs? It looks that way to us, after eye witnesses saw him stumbling out of London's popular club, ROAR. Close friends told RPS of how they'd seen Max arrive already out of it, before hitting on various waitresses as the evening went on. One friend of Payne's told us, "He was out of control, throwing back pills every few minutes,…

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Eurogamer Retro: Max Payne

Max Payne zooms back into our consciousnesses with the appearance of Alan Wake. But stupid stinky Alan Wake is only on 360, and Max Payne is still available for the PC. Does it hold up nearly a decade on? I attempt to answer that question, and also to mock the hilarious writing for as long as I can bear. It begins: "The third-person shooter had…

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9 years ago

10 years ago

Max Pain

Max Payne: The Movie: The Trailer: The Hilarity. (Embedded version beneath the cut. Because you shouldn't ever have to leave our ever-lovin' URL, oh no you shouldn't.) Hmm. If Marky Mark's trying to restore his broken reputation after The Crappening, he's perhaps picked the wrong Semi-Ironic Action Film With Inexplicable Angel O'Death Cameo for his next project.

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