Wot I Think: Valley

Rare’s the game that has me really, truly laughing in sheer delight one minute, then cursing in irritation the next. First-person action-adventure Valley [official site] is full of wonderful ideas and has truly excellent movement, but it also jumps the shark so many times over the course of its few short hours that the poor old sea-beast’s fin is worn down to a bloody stump.
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Deus Ex’s Adam Jensen Doesn’t Care, So Why Should I?

Adam Jensen experiences an emotion, yesterday

Deus Ex: Mankind Divided [official site] has a problem, and his name is Adam Jensen. Human Revolution’s returning protagonist has been my single greatest obstacle to enjoying a game I had, frankly, taken it for granted that I would enjoy. I don’t understand why this is his game – other than on a commercial level, of course. In the public eye, the Deus Ex brand is not the DIY route and vaguely philosophical reality-questioning that it might be to an older PC gamer. It’s The One With The Bearded Bloke With The Elbow Swords And The Sunglasses Built Into His Eye Sockets. That’s why Jensen’s back, not because the story DXMD is trying to tell needed him. If anything, he undermines it.
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Hit It: Rocksmith 2014 Getting Big ‘Remastered’ Update

I tend not to take Rocksmith [official site] seriously because I confuse it with Songsmith, Microsoft’s software that magically created hilarious backing tracks for any vocals you fed it. No, Rocksmith isn’t the software that gave us country & western Ace of Spades or Intergalactic muzak, it’s the rhythm game from Ubisoft which – gasp! – tricks you into learning how to play an actual real guitar. Now Ubi have announced Rocksmith 2014 Edition – Remastered, updating it with a boshload of new tools and features. Fear not: all that will come in a free update for 2014 Edition too.

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Prison Architect Done And Dusted, Scanner Sombre Next

Cell-building sim Prison Architect [official site] has received its last update and the creators are taking a break before they come back to work on their next game, cave explorer Scanner Sombre. They’ll still be doing the odd patch and providing bug support, they say, but this is the last batch of content to be added, resulting in version 2.0. And it’s a bit of an old-fashioned addition, because it adds the ability to use cheats.

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My New Thing Is Making Sculptures In No Man’s Sky

As the dust settles around No Man’s Sky and people realise what it isn’t, more and more are discovering what it can be for them. For me it’s about the ridiculous compulsion to make 22m units so I can buy a 38-slot spaceship. But along the way, I’ve taken to trying to sculpt the vast rocks of elements that litter the surface of the planets. It’s really flipping hard.

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Leak-o! Duke Nukem 3D: World Tour Rumoured

They’re releasing another Duke Nukem, then. Gearbox are muttering to themselves and engaging in dreadful brandter so yup, it’s on. Predictions: the return of jokes already ten years old when Duke Nukem 3D borrowed them twenty years ago; an awkward attempt to reframe Duke’s earnest trashiness as ‘ironic’; a game hoping to coast on former glories. If rumours and leaks are to be believed, the new game is Duke Nukem 3D: World Tour, a ‘remastered’ version of the 1996 FPS with new content and ugly lighting.

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Have You Played… Battlefield 2?

Have You Played? is an endless stream of game retrospectives. One a day, every day of the year, perhaps for all time.

I liked Battlefield 1942, but I loved Battlefield 2. Trading World War 2 for a modern day setting, BF2 maintained the formula of large maps mixing open terrain and tight urban spaces with vehicles aplenty.

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