PlantSims: A story of tragedy and romance

In pursuit of greenery

Feature by Philippa Warr Former Staff Writer

Published on April 27, 2017

Checking in on The Sims 4 [official site] I realised it's having a PlantSim challenge at the moment! PlantSim purists who remember the photosynthesising supernaturalness from previous games seem to be having mixed reactions (too casual/just right/hate it/it's fine/love it/what did you expect from a free update/etc etc) but for me who missed all that I decided to hop in and see about collecting these magic seeds from my green-skinned residents. It... spiralled somewhat and there was at least one disaster. Read on (by clicking the arrow buttons or using the left and right cursor keys) for the whole sorry story...

Our story starts just after I phone someone called Jasmine to get myself a treestump. I am tasked with planting six different seeds, obtained from PlantSims in different moods. How hard can it be? There's one RIGHT THERE IN THE STREET!

Sidenote: the guy in the orange tshirt looks exactly like the best surgeon in Holby City right now - Matteo Rossini. I would rather be chatting to him to see if he tells me his theories about mermaids and cards again. Instead I must talk to J Huntington III. He kind of looks like a preppy zombie.

Time to turn on the PipCharm! In the middle of the road because why not.

It's working! I obtain my first bean. It is a confident bean for a confident lady. Goodbye forever, J Huntington III.

I'm on a roll and immediately turn Pip's attention to a woman in pink who... NO. I SAID "BEAN". B-E-A-N. This is a disaster.

Considering she is going to be interacting with at least six beans I decide I should get Pip to be a chef. That will up her bean expertise and will probably be Very Useful.

She absent-mindedly plants the treestump and the confident bean out in the yard. It's in full view of the neighbours so she will be galvanised into better bean-hunting by not wanting to look like a failure. With that in mind let's head into town and look for likely bean-marks.

PIP WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU HAVE HIS BEAN STOP TALKING TO HIM.

After spending the night in bed ALONE (thank goodness) it's time for a late breakfast, chiselled from the pan, before a productive day of bean-hunting.

Pip is apparently a little too eager to go bean hunting.

Pip! PIP! GET BACK IN THE HOUSE! The man is clearly not comfy with this situation!

That said, we're not above accepting "please leave me alone and put some trousers on" beans.

I send her to the wardrobe. Vest and pants didn't get her arrested near home but going to the play park in knickers is probably not going to go down well.

There are no plant sims in the park so she catches frogs for a while and heads home for a heady evening of cookery shows and sleeping. Her pockets are full of frogs but that seems fine.

The next day brings a sad plant sim to the neighbourhood. She runs out to engage him in bean-related conversation.

He is too sad for chats. Perhaps she should befriend him before asking for the sad bean, then he won't feel used as well as sad and Pip won't look like a terrible person.

She chases him down and tries to verbally strongarm him into feeling better. Also literally because of all the hugging.

Bean time!

He is too happy to be giving sad beans to anyone. PIP YOU IDIOT!

While I decide to abandon the nice-Pip strategy and just go for making bean-based demands of total strangers, Pip earns a promotion at work. Good work, Pip! You'll make head chef before you know it!

Oh for the love of... GET YOUR CLOTHES ON, WOMAN.

Chasing down beans has left Pip a bit hungry so she ought to enjoy a hearty breakfast before work. Her work as a professional caterer. Pip? PIP? Oh god.

RUN, PIP! GET IN THE SHOWER! ANYTHING! JUST MOVE!

...

The fire takes too long to burn itself out so I resurrect a save file. I use the fire as an excuse to pep up the decor - dinosaur paintings, fruit bowls, a set of cloud lights. It's feeling a lot more like home and a lot less like an ashy ruin with a body in the corner.

It also seems to increase Pip's productivity on the bean-gathering front! We only have the flirty bean left to collect.

The flirty bean is purple and Pip mistakes the purple "focused" aura on this sim for flirtiness. She makes some unsubtle advances.

The ensuing downturn in the conversation leads to embarrassment so excruciating she hides in the shower until the conversation is cleansed from her memory.

While I'm figuring out the flirty action plan Pip goes to work and gets a promotion to caterer. NO! I REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENS NEXT. I immediately install a smoke alarm and a sprinkler system.

Oh god JUST GO AWAY.

Let's just gloss over the trading of sexy chit chat for legumes and assume it was all totally above board and not literally and metaphorically seedy.

The success is marred slightly by the fact J Huntington III is apparently undeterrable. (I tried to angle the camera to block him out using the balloon lights)

Pip, just ignore him and focus on the tree stump magic bean project.

Still ignoring him. Maybe he's leaving?

Ooh! That was dramatic! Did we kill him?

I mean, he seems to be gone and this was a pretty powerful tree explosion.

Oh for... GET IN THE TREE, PIP.

I video-ed the immediate aftermath of visiting the tree!

The plant effect lasts for a few days and in that time Pip's needs change a bit so she needs to be well-hydrated and absorbing sunlight in order to feed. She has also taken to doing push-ups in the street. I have no idea if that's an effort to be closer to the earth or something.

"4...5...99...100...101..."

I also added a pool to aid with the water situation and I'm trying to make the most of her uptick in gardening skills to grow some FIERCE vegetables and herbs. She is still not into clothes.