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Posts tagged “Diary”

Feature: Minimum wage emotions

Ritual Of The Moon diary: day four

Today it became clear to me that part of my Ritual Of The Moon is going to be the witch saving the world every day (apart from the two write-offs at the start that we're not talking about). Every day she will do a ritual, and then divert a meteor away so it doesn't strike Earth. And I think: where are all these meteors coming…

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Feature: Skipped one

Ritual Of The Moon diary: day two but really day three

Playing Ritual Of The Moon today taught me two things. 1) I had not actually stopped the meteor on day one from hitting Earth, only thought I did; and 2) the game continues whether I play it or not. I had fully intended to check in on the exiled moon witch this weekend, but wasn't able to. Another meteor blammo'd the surface in my absence,…

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Feature: The War Mayor cancels the apocalypse

Dwarf Fortress diary: The Basement Of Curiosity episode nine – Titanfall

Last time on the BoC: Following near-disaster at the gristly green hands of a goblin raiding party, the War Mayor Dashmob usurped the throne of mayor Urist, and began a campaign to modernise and expand the fort’s small but spirited military. A tomb complex was built, a dead donkey was put on display at the zoo, and Amost, the daughter of fortress mascot Id, engaged…

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Feature: (Wo)man in the moon

Ritual Of The Moon diary: day one

Friday is as good a day to start as any, right? Day one of Ritual Of The Moon and I am thinking about my period (warning!! TMI ALERT!!!!). Ritual Of The Moon is a month long game that you play for five minutes a day, for 28 days, about a witch exiled to the moon, so I don't think it's a huge associative reach tbh.…

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Feature: There's a new mayor in town

Dwarf Fortress diary: The Basement Of Curiosity episode eight – All Hail the War Mayor

Last time on the BoC: The arrival of marauding goblins ended the brief rule of the usurping mayor Urist, and the battle to drive them off saw the fort’s first non-accidental fatalities, as well as the emergence of several new heroes. But if the Basement’s founder Lorbam hoped to resume business as usual in her weird little zoo when the dust cleared, she was sorely…

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Feature: Our explorer's journey continues

I flew to the centre of the galaxy in Elite Dangerous, only to find it overrun with criminals

It has been two months since I set off to reach the centre of the galaxy. I’m happy to report that I made it. For those not following my adventures, I’m part of the Distant Worlds 2 expedition, a ragtag group of Elite Dangerous explorers who have set out to cross the galaxy and construct a new space station at its core, a safe haven…

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Feature: Witness the horror of the Dwarven Handshake

Dwarf Fortress diary: The Basement of Curiosity episode seven – The Battle of Carambola Ridge

Last time on the BoC: The culture war between fort founder Lorbam and the usurper mayor Urist reached a head with the “accidental” death of administrator Mistem. Maddened by the insulting tomb constructed for her supporter, and by the droning of a hopeless freestyle rapper, Urist lost the plot and made some greaves. But amidst all this drama, nobody noticed the goblin raiders approaching until…

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Feature: Death comes to the Basement

Dwarf Fortress diary: The Basement of Curiosity episode six – Through the Interesting Door

Last time on the BoC: A new migrant, Urist, declared herself mayor, leading to a power struggle with former expedition leader Lorbam. A lot of politically controversial artefacts were made, and wrestlin’ dad Id got blasted into the mince zone by a pack of dingos. Late Winter, Y2 We return to the Basement of Curiosity at the bum end of winter, in the mildew-stinking, sand-walled…

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Feature: The dwarves get an awful new mayor

Dwarf Fortress diary: The Basement of Curiosity episode five – culture war, dingo war

Last time on the BoC: The fortress doubled in population, and the dwarves embarked on a serious programme of home improvements. A kobold with no tongue dropped by to visit, and expedition leader Lorbam’s blood started appearing in spooky places. Mid Summer, Y2 Trumpets sound deep in the jungle, flat notes hanging on the hot air like birds of prey. The inhabitants of the Basement…

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Feature: Haunted blood has to be bad news, right?

Dwarf Fortress diary: The Basement of Curiosity Episode Four – Messages from Zon

Last time on the BoC: Expedition leader Lorbam captured the first set of animals for her underground zoo, and the fort gained its first warrior, in the form of Id “Snakebuster” Osustavuz. A weasel disrupted the fabric of spacetime, and two miners fell in love.

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Feature: Looks like snake tripe's back on the menu, boys

Dwarf Fortress diary: The Basement Of Curiosity episode three – a gruesome winter

Last time on the BoC: The dwarves of the Basement discovered the concept of medicine just in time to stop the expedition’s demise due to falling logs. Some immigrants arrived to help realise Lorbam’s vision of an underground zoo, while Lorbam herself scraped together the fort’s loose change to buy that zoo’s first exhibit: a skinny hound.

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Feature: The dwarves could only afford a dog for their zoo

Dwarf Fortress diary: The Basement Of Curiosity episode two – flailing in a pool of dwarf pus

Last time on the BoC: Expedition leader Lorbam shepherded her dwarves to the Jungle of Hides, where they spent the spring digging out a home in a lush valley. Rakust the lumberjack got his leg bruted by a tree, and Imush the craftsdwarf got extremely excited about bins. Author’s disclaimer: Once again, things get pretty weird here. Accordingly, I should remind you that I’m not…

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Feature: I’m gonna make a chimp zoo

Dwarf Fortress diary: The Basement Of Curiosity episode one – crushed legs and eagle guts

Most articles about Dwarf Fortress start with a long-winded attempt to explain Dwarf Fortress, but this one won’t. I don’t want to tell you what this game does - I want to show you, right now. Then, if you’re interested, you can learn all about what it is afterwards.

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Feature: The post-apocalypse is a real grind

Death of a skater boy in Cataclysm: Dark Days Ahead

It wouldn't be a post-apocalypse without a diary piece. Cataclysm: Dark Days Ahead is an old-fashioned roguelike that drops you into a crumbling world full of grumpy walking corpses. These zombies may be represented by a shambling ‘Z’, in keeping with the game’s ASCII origins. But they can also be rendered in gooey sprite form for ASCII-phobes. This is a cleaner-looking version that makes grass…

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Feature: An imbalance of the humours

The Yawhg: an end of the world diary with leeches

The Yawhg is a game about what happens if the end of the world is coming but you don’t know that, and thus don’t care, and carry on doing whatever it was you were going to do anyway. Would it help? Would it matter? Would you survive? It's a PC game but plays like a board game, almost. There are four characters who take it…

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Feature: Trials and ambulations

Halloween 2018 Special: how Creatures taught me I am not cut out to be a father

Alice Bee told me we were doing a day of adorable, heart-warming video game escapades. She charged me with the care of some artificial lifeforms: ensuring they were nourished, cherished and ready to flourish. I intended to teach my Creatures how to live the good life. I failed to teach them how to use a lift.

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Feature: Eat your words

Chapter Two of The Brief and Incredibly Poetic Life of Bañec Hazyblockades: a Dwarf Fortress diary

We return to the exciting conclusion of the tale of Bañec Hazyblockades, a brave hero who set out to conquer the world of Dwarf Fortress with only the power of poetry. In last week's episode, our hero was attacked for no reason by a vicious, but apparently undernourished, archer. It looked like this was the end for Bañec, until suddenly - - he runs. He…

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Feature: Pen =/= sword

The Brief and Incredibly Poetic Life of Bañec Hazyblockades: a Dwarf Fortress diary

This is a Dwarf Fortress adventurer mode journal, in which I live (and, perhaps die) by the poem. The goal is simple: try to survive and thrive in Adventurer mode of Dwarf Fortress by relying mostly on the poetry and language skills. Read on to hear the tragic riddle of Bañec Hazyblockades, poet of the Mortal Society of the Released Union, who sang her own…

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Feature: Punks

A Frostpunk diary of certain doom, finale: democracy is death

Concluding my brutish and short first play of survival-management curio Frostpunk. When last you left us, we had survived disaster by the skin of our teeth, and even welcomed a giant robot into the fold. Now, as the nights draw in and the fires dim, can my proud people survive the rest of this calamitous winter?

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Feature: Jeff Freezos returns

A Frostpunk diary of certain doom, part 3: small mercies

The ongoing tale of a desperate first run in survival/management sim Frostpunk. When last we spoke, everyone was starving, everyone was ill, there weren't enough homes and people were choosing death over amputation. It's day 10 in the frozen remnants of what was once Britain, and it looks like it's all over already. Oh ye of little faith.

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