You’ll have noticed the “No more than nine wizards at a time” handwritten sign in the corner shop window. It’s common knowledge that ten wizards together will inevitably brawl over some Ancient, Nexus, Titan, pick ‘n’ mix, or goodness knows what. Here’s a secret: five wizards are just as unsafe, as they’ll group up on an ‘epic quest’ and wander the neighbourhood to fight something, anything. ‘PvE’, they call it. A bloody nuisance, I say. Last night I found five steaming wizards tangled in my washing line shouting e.g. “It’s casting Root!” and “Watch the adds!” while swatting at the peg bag.