Posts Tagged ‘StarCraft II: Heart Of The Swarm’

Hot For HOTS: Blizzard’s MOBA Now Heroes Of The Storm

Blizzard might want to consider firing its acronym-wrangling-keeping-washing-and-redeploying department (or AWKWARD, for short), because it seems to have run out of ideas. Once upon a time, there was this little expansion pack called StarCraft II: Heart of the Swarm, but its friends just called it HOTS. And now Blizzard’s MOBA, once known as Blizzard All-Stars, has been rechristened Heroes of the Storm – aka, er, HOTS. Gee, this sure is awkwar– wait, I get it now! Oh AWKWARD, you clever scoundrels, you. But yes, Blizzard’s officially chasing dreams of MOBA glory again, and a big re-reveal is set for BlizzCon next month.

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Wot I Think – StarCraft II: Heart Of The Swarm Singleplayer

It probably won’t come as any shock to learn that none of the current RPS team have gone the distance in StarCraft II’s incomparable multiplayer, but I can at least tell you what I made of the expansive singleplayer campaign in its first expansion, Heart of the Swarm. No throwaway side-dish, this is a vast, bubbling, consciously epic, setpiece-filled cauldron of scifi RTS-RPG. This time around, the stars are hiveminded alien nasties the Zerg and their sometime ruler Sarah Kerrigan, seeking a comeback and revenge after the events of StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty. Scuttle this way and I’ll tell you more.
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The Buttocks Of StarCraft II: Heart of the Swarm

Zagara visits the gym regularly, clearly

Playing through the StarCraft II: Heart of the Swarm campaign this weekend, I couldn’t help but be struck by Blizzard’s equality-minded approach to how it depicts its characters’ hindquarters. I’ve just been through every cutscene again, and screengrabbed every bottom I could spot (barring repeat shots and most of the slow zooms).
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StarCraft II: Heart Of The Swarm Starts Beating

Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeech!

“… and over to Craig, who you might say is at the ‘heart of the launch’. Ahahah! Craig?”

“Thanks, Cara. I’m reporting live from the StarCraft II: Heart of the Swarm launch. You might say I’m at the ‘heart of the launch’.”

“I just said that, Craig.”

“I know you did. I was just, er, vamping. You know? Okay. Look, I’ll admit. I wasn’t paying attention. Someone just told me Heart of the Swarm had been released. I was asleep 10 minutes ago, dreaming about helping Vince McMahon’s daughter choose survival clothes. It wasn’t even Stephanie. So, yes: Heart of the Swarm, the second game of the second StarCraft, went live just over eleven hours ago, and the always-on-the-ball RPS have a barely awake Scotsman telling you all about it.”

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Power Overwhelming – StarCraft II: HoTS’ CG Opening

Here's the one frame in the opening that's not 90 percent or more gray.

Yes, I’m aware that “power overwhelming” is a Protoss line – not Zerg. But that’s really the only way to adequately describe what’s being depicted in StarCraft II: Heart of the Swarm‘s ultra-lavish CG opening. Well, that or “ooky, pukey Overlord Leviathan¬†insides,” but a) those don’t show up for too terribly long and b) I wanted to forget that they showed up at all. So mainly, Blizzard continues in its rich – if all-too-predictable – tradition of titanic armies clashing and beating each other over the head with kitchen sinks the size of Death Stars. Oh, but this time, there’s also A Twist. I wish I could tell you that I mean The Twist – implying that everyone sets aside their differences for a scintillatingly choreographed dance number – but sadly, you’ll just have to settle for a surprise reveal at the end.

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Heart Of The Swarm Beta Opens To Order Of Pre-Orderers


The Big Lizard send word that they’ve opened Heart Of The Swarm’s beta to people who pre-ordered before December 18th. People who pre-order from now on will be placed in a kind of vat and liquidised. No wait, I read that wrong, they will be added to the beta in subsequent waves. That’s right. There’s a download link for the client through the link, but unless you’ve got beta access it won’t work, no way, no how. Unless you’re a magician. Or a magic hacker. Or a time-traveller. Any of those is fine.

The game itself is all set for a March 2013 launch. I’ve posted a trailer below, in case you’ve forgotten what a Starcraft 2 is, for some reason.
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StarCraft II: Heart Of The Swarm Swarms Into Sight On…

look at them all, swarming away there

Oh, that was such a dick move of me, wasn’t it? To do a … and everything to make you read the story? It’s not even because I’m chasing hits. Hits, shmits – it’s just that I’ve got a tiresome headcold and am feeling highly belligerent as a result.

I’ll make up for this awful wasting of your time by definitely not posting the StarCraft II: Heart of the Swarm release date underneath the ‘Read the rest of this entry’ jump.
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