Posts Tagged ‘Uwe Boll’

The Oh Dear Hunter: Tunnel Rats 1968

This is what about 90% of the game looks like. Except gloomier, and not at this jaunty angle.

It’s all too easy to mock Uwe Boll. But I’m not afraid of a lack of challenge. The long-time film director, famous for his tax-loophole-advantage-taking reinventions of game licenses, has become one of the more celebrated anti-heroes of the internet. Equally known for his vociferous and sometimes violent responses to criticism as he is for churning out unutterably awful films, he and his movies are a lot of fun to loathe. And then came Tunnel Rats. Apparently renamed 1968 Tunnel Rats for its cinematic release (I confess I have not seen the improvised Vietnam film), it was not based on any game license. However, Boll planned to reverse the process, and hired Replay Studios – they responsible for the terrible Velvet Assassin – to convert it into shooty-pixels. Bravely, like a brave soldier, I bravely played it.

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Life Imitates Art – Uwe Boll’s First Game

Man with gun in Vietnam. YOU THINK OF A FUNNY CAPTION.

The universe is complete. It’s all about circles, you see. That’s my new bullshit theory, on which I will now build both an alternative therapy and life-coaching courses, at astonishing prices. My proof: Uwe Boll is making a movie – 1968 Tunnel Rats – that’s not based on a videogame. And a videogame is being made of his movie! IT ALL CONNECTS!

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Blizzard Deny World Boll’s Next Movie

Devastating news to start the week. There will never be a Uwe Boll movie set in the World of Warcraft universe. MTV spoke to the modern day Eisenstein and learned of this new tragedy. Boll told them,

Won't someone show him some love?

“I got in contact with Paul Sams of Blizzard, and he said, ‘We will not sell the movie rights, not to you… especially not to you.’ Because it’s such a big online game success, maybe a bad movie would destroy that ongoing income, what the company has with it.”

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Scott Miller Promises No Uwe Boll

Games Radar must be delighted.

It’s all go with Radar Group. After the site’s aborted launch and the reveal of Prey 2, followed by Scott Miller’s interview with IGN, Radar is now up and running, and already blogging.

While he repeats the word “storyverse”, although this time doubling the sinister nature with a “TM”, there’s some material in there that doesn’t repeat the recent interview. For instance, proudly declaring who won’t be directing any of their game-based movies.

“Depth [Entertainment – their “cross-media partner” responsible for the production of movies] will provide Radar with a deep talent pool for our projects, as well as be a good potential source for new concepts that can then be further developed into both game concepts and linear concepts. The Radar/Depth connection is likely the best yet conceived between the games industry and Hollywood, with both sides being equal partners with equal footing. Everyone knows Hollywood and the game industry have been oil and water in the past. Depth will prove – and is already proving – that the proper collaboration can be highly beneficial. We promise that Uwe Boll will never direct one of our movies!”

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Postal Movie Date Announced, Denounced

It takes a lot to offend RPS. You say you slept with our mothers, we’ll suggest you visit the STD clinic. So it’s unlikely you’ll see any of us standing outside cinemas at the release of Uwe Boll’s Postal this 23rd May, waving placards campaigning against whatever crap the new millennium’s Ed Wood has cooked up. Where you can offend us is by being rubbish. Based on these criteria, it’s safe to say Boll has upset us on numerous occasions.

Dave Foley! WHY?!

So it’s surprising that Postal devs, Running With Scissors (be warned: NSFW), are enthusiastic about the Postal movie. Well, surprising until you realise that RWS’ CEO, Vince Desi, stars in the film. Desi and Boll comment below.

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