I know a classic when I see it. There it is, near the top of Steam’s list of new games: Woodcutter Simulator 2013. Sure, it’s already out-of-date, and likely won’t feature 2014’s most exciting range of woodcutting innovations, but I was prepared to suck that up and get on. I, as a woodcutter, am burly, powerful, able to take on anything. Look at my rugged frame! My bushy woodsman beard! LOOK AT ME HOLDING A CHAINSAW!