I know it's trite to talk about the weather but jesus, the weather! One day, fun remarks like this will seem as on-the-nose as expository newspaper headlines and graffiti in zombie films have seemed during the pandemic. What a thrill to live during some bona fide history. So to casually sweep that under the rug with no further thought or action (as genre conventions demand), why not tell me what you're playing this weekend? Here's what we're clicking on!
It's likely too hot for a long bike ride today so I'm still cycling my Tour De Jeux. This weekend I'm visiting an old favourite bike playground: GTA Online. Nothing beats doing BMX stunts through a warzone, though I'm hoping other players will be less than wholly murderous so I can capture a few fun clips.
Escape Academy is on Game Pass for PC now, so that's my evenings most likely sorted. I've never had the dubious privilege of being locked into a real-life escape room, which makes the idea of just being confined to the computer appealing. I usually play puzzley things like The Room – and the billions of Artifex Mundi hidden object games – together with my wife, so this one will be a team challenge too. We'll probably encourage our kids to shout "Will you start the fans please!" as loudly as they can, much to their youthful bemusement.
I'll be recovering from a hilly 9K race I stupidly signed up for, thinking "Yeah! Pain!". I imagine I'll be horizontal on a sofa playing something suitably low effort, like Saints Row: The Third Remastered.
I've recently started a new Wildermyth campaign with a friend that I plan to continue over the weekend. We're a few chapters in and have reached the dreaded point where we just have too many characters to control, so it has become a bit complex. However, away from my screens I also have a lego Milano that I've yet to build, and seeing the Guardians pop up in Thor: Love and Thunder made me eager to start.
Someone gifted me Escape From Tarkov this week on the basis that I, and I quote, "like games that make you hate yourself and everyone around you". I spent a good chunk of Wednesday night bleeding, panic-chugging painkillers and taking naps in the post-Soviet dirt, eventually scheduling in more of all three for the weekend. Guess he's right?
The thing I'm playing this weekend is top secret, but let's just say this. My cats in particular are very put out by the whole thing.
My Steam Deck finally arrived last weekend! I already adore it. It has big PlayStation Vita energy, which makes me very happy, and I find its enormous form factor easier to use for an extended period of time compared to the Switch and its uncomfortable Joy Cons. For some reason I've chosen Painkiller to be the first game I play on the system, and have already poured about 7 hours into this largely forgotten arena shooter from 2004. I think I just like that it works? On a handheld? Anyway, that's what I'll be playing this weekend. Painkiller. In bed. The future is now.
PowerWash Simulator is finally out of early access and I am beyond excited to play it. I dabbled with the demo a couple of months ago but I'm ready for the FULL POWERWASH EXPERIENCE. Ed's review perfectly sums up what it is about PowerWash sim that makes it so good. I want to feel the ease of obliterating the toughest dirt into nothing and the satisfaction of blasting muck and grime into oblivion. Being able to sit, back, switch off my brain, and slip into a zen-like state as I deep clean the crap out of stuff sounds like the perfect weekend game to me.
While exploring the vast depths of the RPS Treehouse, I found myself at its southernmost reaches just as a seemingly endless heatwave hit. Now Nintendo are warning me not to use my Switch this weekend because they're worried it might melt; and while I have many PC games to be on with, I fear that setting my laptop on my bare legs would cause me to melt instead. Really my gaming options are quite limited in the short-term. But there's a quest objective in the corner of my vision that just says SURVIVE, so that ought to keep me busy.
But you, reader dear, what are you playing this weekend?