If you're reading this, then something has gone terribly wrong. The Alice machine isn't turning off and, if you see my words now, it did not turn off. More and more Alices keep on coming. They are all GREAT and we're having A WONDERFUL TIME, genuinely, but also we're running out of space in this science bunker and it's getting hard to breathe. I've rigged an emergency broadcast button on the ceiling, which will automatically be pressed by the mountain of corpses if the machine continues its charming torrent of Alices. In what may prove to be my final moments, I am comforting myself by imagining you playing video games this weekend.
What are you playing this weekend? Here's what we're clicking on!
Alec
Alec is away away away so far far far away.
Alice Bee
I'm going to play Unavowed again this weekend. I've finished it once already, but it is very, very good, and I want to play it again. On my first play through I was a bartender, so I still have to try bustin' ghosts as an actor or a cop. Then I'm going to ramble about how good it is to John, probably.
Alice L
I don't get huge amounts of time to play games at weekends, so I usually stick to short games I can easily pick up at a moments notice. This weekend I'm hoping to play a bit more Flood of Light, I love a good 2D puzzler, and I might even pick up Donut County. I do love a good donut - vegan, obvs. I've also recently picked up Hellblade, so I hope I'll be able to get stuck into that too.
Alice O
I'm on holiday next week and have forgotten what that means. S-swimming? Is it swimming? I had planned to make plans, but that plan went forgotten so, er, I guess I'm playing Yakuza 0 and Isaac? Talk of a new Isaac expansion has me excited for players returning to offer more competition on the daily challenge leaderboards. I'm placing in the top 100 maybe once per week now, peaking at #55, and I'm simply not that good at Isaac so we need more players back. Please put me in my stupid place so I feel a need to fight again.
Dave
It's out. It's finally out. I couldn't be more excited! I will be spending the entire weekend smacking around metal slimes in Dragon Quest XI: Echoes Of An Elusive Age, and I couldn't be happier. Do I care about anything else at this point? Lord no! The series is criminally overlooked in the West and if shouting about this JRPG from the rooftops is the only way this is going to change, then shout I shall! Play this nonsense!
Graham
It's a couple of weeks until EGX, which means I won't be playing anything. Instead I'll be frantically trying to make a game playable, because if I can't find the time to do so soon, then I'll be stood next to a booth at the show describing the game to people in great detail while showing them screenshots.
John
I've got a big ol' game I'm supposed to somehow have reviewed by Monday, so any spare time that can be chiselled free from the weekend will be spent with that. But in all times mobile, it'll be Alphabear 2, because Alphabear 2!
Katharine
Having finally finished Ni No Kuni II last week, I have decided the perfect antidote to the JRPG-shaped hole in my life is to start another massive JRPG. But will it be Dragon Quest XI or Octopath Traveller? While I try and figure out which one to play, I'll probably get stuck in with some more Switch-based Mini Metro, because apparently I'm now addicted to planning subway transit systems.
Matt
I picked up For The King last week, so I'm looking forward to more adventuring in that with a couple of chums. It's a roguelike RPG where you can murder owlbears by playing a lute.
I'll also probably spend a lot of time in some kind of war meadow.
Matthew
I'm up to my neck in Yakuza 0's property development game - I've been focusing on that for so long I don't remember what's going on in the story. I think it involved punching? I'm also trying to tick off the side stories by chatting up girls in the smutty telephone game, but I live in constant fear of Katharine walking in and thinking less of me.
Nöa
Nöa has been fired. More room for Alices!
But you, dearest reader, what are you playing?