GTA V In Cars, Guns, Strippers & Posturing Shocker

By Alec Meer on April 30th, 2013 at 4:30 pm.

Isn't that Harvey Pekar?

There will be a new GTA game soon. Maybe it’ll be on PC. It has three characters, all of which are violent, sweary men. It has some improvements to the graphics. It’s spent a lot on music and voice-acting. It has the same sort of gags as the last dozen GTA games/expansions, but with different words. It really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really wants to be a movie.

Here are three new trailers, cunningly combined into one, and focusing exclusively on the story rather than on what you get to do. With crushing, miserable inevitability, there is a strip club scene, because there is always a strip club scene. IGN or someone will have a shot-by-shot analysis any second now, but you can watch the plain old videos below if you really want to.

Nice to hear Radio Gaga though.

That’s out in September. Probably not on PC, though. They’ll do that a few months later.

I’ll play it, of course. I’ll probably enjoy it too, on the basis of a) a certain basic, carefree brutality and b) exploring a no-doubt highly-detailed cityscape, to the accompaniment of a super-cool soundtrack. It’s just that a drip-feed of cod-cinema adverts, steeped in unrefined testosterone and which tell me 1% of jackshit about what the game’s actually like are not currently inspiring me to want to do so.

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228 Comments »

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  1. pakoito says:

    I’ve been trying hard not to do this in public, but *YAWN*

    • CutieKnucklePie says:

      Indeed. MegaYawn V: The Yawning

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        DrScuttles says:

        Yawn Hard 2: Yawn Harder

        • kyrieee says:

          Yaun 3: shitty writing

          • Koozer says:

            Y4WN

          • Professor Snake says:

            Yawn.

            It’s a reboot.

          • DonDrapersAcidTrip says:

            .

          • pakoito says:

            Not everyone is from the US and is part of the drug dealing/crime ring.

          • P.Funk says:

            @DonDrapersAcidTrip

            You say you think R* is the best in gaming for writer. Sure, maybe that’s true. That doesn’t implicitly mean that its technically good writing by the standards of all modern popular storytelling mediums. Compared to Mad Men or Breaking Bad there isn’t a single fucking game developer that comes close in this era, not even an iota.

            There have been games which were written with as much passion and real character as a good show or movie, something quintessentially good writing universally. I’m reminded of Grim Fandango from 1998. That was a brilliantly written game.

            Fact is that R* has presentation on its side. It has dialogue that doesn’t sound like some half assed crap from an RPG written by college drop outs who muddle their way through cut scenes that are mostly 2nd rate. Fine. R* approaches perhaps at its best, the most mediocre of television, at its best.

            You compare a show like Deadwood, The Wire, hell even something a bit more soapy drama like Homeland and you can’t even blink at a computer game without writing it off.

            Gaming is in my opinion very far off from being a serious story telling genre, at least in terms of high quality TV or film style presentation. There are other ways to tell stories. Gaming excels at telling make believe stories. The whole Dungeons and Dragons thing dove tails into gaming so excellently. Sandbox games also. Lets of course not forget the “story” of multiplier experiences with friends.

            Nevertheless, GTA’s mostly aren’t written with a whole lot of depth. Its mostly just the best of the best in terms of what gaming can offer with respect to mainstream pop culture parody/satire. Every GTA is basically ripping off a Scorcese movie, or a Michael Mann movie, or some other movie. It plays off of very predictable tropes. Most GTAs don’t involve a whole lot of surprise. They aren’t going to create too many cliffhangers that you’ll remember the rest of your life like so many films or TV shows do.

            I can watch Apocalypse Now Redux over and over and over. I get something new out of it every time. I play a GTA game more than twice and I’m yawning through the cutscenes if I’m not skipping half of them.

            I think gaming has a long way to go before we can call it serious story telling, a long way to go back maybe. Late 90s had some excellent story telling too, but the death of the adventure game genre kinda put the kaybosh on triple A Tim Schafer offerings.

          • DonDrapersAcidTrip says:

            .

          • blackmyron says:

            GTA? Great writing? Yeah, I’m going to disagree on that one. GTA is barely tolerable when they try to play it serious, which GTA IV was lousy with.
            That, and that they seem to want you to hate playing Niko, to the point where the official game guide said “Isn’t it funny how all the big scores seem to fall apart?” or something to that effect.

          • Ureshi says:

            Yawn of the dead

          • DonDrapersAcidTrip says:

            “That, and that they seem to want you to hate playing Niko, to the point where the official game guide said ‘Isn’t it funny how all the big scores seem to fall apart?’ or something to that effect.”

            Uh, that’s a classic noir/heist trope. Should everything be smooth sailing for him?

          • DestroyYourEgo says:

            Nikko sucks.

            And GTA has shitty writing.

            Seriously, if you think GTA has good writing, you need to pick up a book. Stat! Any book- even “The Cat in the Hat” has a more compelling, twisted drug-ring story arc than GTA.

            God, you sheeple are SOOOOO out of touch with reality. I’d suggest pulling your heads out of your asses, but you seem to like the views/odors up there, so just keep on stickin’ it right on up there.

        • SominiTheCommenter says:

          Yawn 2: Electric Boogaloo

    • Ultra Superior says:

      ^^ Console envy.

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        colossalstrikepackage says:

        Yawn-vy?

      • analydilatedcorporatestyle says:

        I noted with interest that the cost of hiring a prostitute in London had plummeted in the past five years. This was attributed to a large influx on Eastern European ‘ladies’ flooding the market.

        Not only are prices down but the range of services on offer has increased.

        In light of this real world metric can Rockstar assign a button to ‘up the wrong’un for little cash’

    • Consumatopia says:

      This trailer seems like it was designed to refute the old “if you don’t care about it why did you post” retort. It’s kind of amazing how uninspiring this is. It’s significance is it’s blandness. The most interesting thing to talk about is how little there is to say about it. A double negative isn’t always the same thing as a positive.

      (To be clear, I’m talking about the trailer itself, not Meer’s post on the trailer.)

      • pakoito says:

        I tried not to look like a hipster, counterculture, hate bandwagon or anything everywhere else. Now, an explosion of tweets, post, commentaries and personal messages from friends made me watch it, and not be amused.

        The trailer was uninspired, the writing is bad, the inspiration comes from shows I don’t watch or like, and it’s from a genre I don’t completely enjoy. I understand the implications behind the trailer, the teases and the stereotypes, as Cara says below it’s gracefully crafted, just not for me.

        The game will sell like hot cakes anyway, and people will enjoy it, and that’s ok.

        • BreadBitten says:

          But something must have compelled you to conjure up a few words and then post it on the internet for the anonymous to see. I’d love to hear your reasoning behind this.

          • pakoito says:

            Karma. Oh wait, this is not reddit.

            I guess just voicing my discontent and see whether the answer was positive or negative…like pretty much anything I say on the internet.

            As I said, “tried to” didn’t mean I succeeded.

          • Captain Joyless says:

            Some product is being developed for someone other than me????

            ENGAGE INTERNET RANT MACHIEN

          • walldad says:

            Joyless, you know what they say — if you’re watching it, it’s for you!

          • Consumatopia says:

            If there’s a trailer that everyone is talking about, and that trailer is boring, then why wouldn’t someone talk about that? GTA is obviously a huge franchise in gaming, therefore it’s unsurprising when commentary on it comes from outside the fanbase. Once something becomes big enough, it’s worth talking about even if you don’t like it (though I might actually like GTA V when it comes out).

        • DestroyYourEgo says:

          We will see progress when the groupthink doesn’t coin teerms like, “hipster” or “counterculture”.

          I am neither. I just hate bullshit. I’m like Stan on the Ass Burgers episode of South Park,

          And believe me, this game is shit! Fuck you, you’ll buy it! ;)

          GTA Starring Steamy Ball-lick.

    • noodlecake says:

      You guys are the very definition of Hipster. Hating on games that do everything they do better than any other game has ever done them. *Yawn* There hasn’t been an open world 3rd person game as good as GTA IV since GTA IV. Sleeping Dogs was kinda fun but horrendously B Movie-esque and has horrible arcadey driving.

      I’ve never used the word hipster as an insult, but the *yawn* response definitely justifies it.

      • Consumatopia says:

        This trailer didn’t focus on open world, but on the story and cut scenes. “I just ignore the plot and commit crimes” is not an unusual comment to hear on GTA, even outside hipster circles.

        • noodlecake says:

          I’m not sure what your point is. It does open world anarchic fun better than any other open world game AS WELL as having a fantastic single player campaign with an engaging story and well written characters. Saints Row has a ton of random stuff that you can do, but the physics are terrible, the world bland, the enemies cringe worthily cheesy and the general atmosphere pretty horrible. GTA IV, on the other hand has unparalleled physics compared to every other open world game, which is a phenomenal achievement considering it’s 5 years old.

          • pakoito says:

            It’s all about standards. You say Saint’s Row was bland and cheesy. It was. So is GTA V, from this trailer, and so was GTA IV. Your standards say this is TEH SHITZ. Mines doesn’t.

            About the physics, it was called Euphoria, it was developed for a decade and it was proprietary and expensive to the point where you cannot name 2 more games using it.

            You can also scan the thread for opinions better written than mine about the low standards in this game (and game narrative in general).

          • Jdopus says:

            If it makes you feel any better, I agree with you. I’m honestly surprised at how many people seem to have suddenly decided they hate GTA. It’s always had a great sense of humour, solid storylines and fun gameplay, the only criticism I ever see of it is that some entries in the series aren’t as good as other entries.

          • Consumatopia says:

            “open world anarchic fun better than any other open world game”

            Sure, but any time I’ve played I’ve only enjoyed it for 10 minute stretches. I liked just causing random chaos up until the point where I had to interact with cut scenes and annoying missions. Then I got sick of it. And you can’t play the hipster card on me–everyone I’ve ever met who’s told me that they play GTA tells me they do the same thing.

            I mean, yeah, it does make 10 minute runs of causing random chaos more fun than any other game I’ve played. Granted. But that chaos doesn’t scale–I mean, you could play for hours stealing random cars and killing random people but there would be no point. (Obviously, if it was your design goal, you could make criminal chaos that scaled up infinitely high–you steal bigger stuff to buy bigger weapons and recruit a larger gang to fight more cops, until you become an unstoppable warlord and Western civilization completely collapses. Has anyone made that game yet?)

            “as having a fantastic single player campaign with an engaging story and well written characters”

            This isn’t really what GTA is known for. No, not even in the mainstream. They could probably sell even more GTA games if they suddenly proclaimed that there were no scripted missions or cut scenes anymore. Rockstar’s self-identity wouldn’t tolerate that, though.

      • DestroyYourEgo says:

        Wouldn’t the people that are jumping on the proverbial bandwagon be a hipster?

        I mean, you saying there wasn’t a good open-world game since GTA4 sounds kinda hipster, to me.

        And furthermore, I’m here to tell you- you’re wrong and your opinion is invalid.

        GTA4 was neither a good open-world game NOR a good game. I’d be all for GTA if they didn’t suck nowadays. GTA4 was bad, and this will be bad.

        You can call as many people “hipsters” as you want, but their not going to be getting my mafuckin’ money. And isn’t it hip to give your money to the latest trend?

        Wow- you idiots need a dictionary, a life, or a bullet to the brain.

        I’d be happy to give you either (or all three).

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      Oozo says:

      Well, even if you’re bored by the trailer and, perhaps, even by the game eventually following it, there’s is this thing, beautiful and thrilling in itself, that sprung from it:

      http://gtavtrailercomments.tumblr.com/

      So I’m grateful that this trailer exists, in a second order-kind of way, I guess.

      • BubbaNZ says:

        This One thanks you for That Link. It made me larf and larf and larf.

      • DestroyYourEgo says:

        Lol- you know the fanboys either hate it or just flat out don’t get it- so therefore, they hate it!

        “I don’t get what this is saying.. sure, I’ve said those things about GTA5, but why are they being said here over that picture. Uhhhhh… I don’t get it- I hate the Jews!”

        Ah, I love people! Thank you for posting that link- I love it, and have re-posted it elsewherrrrrrreeeeee! ;)

  2. Zakkeh says:

    It made me feel a little sad when the IGN reviewers had to be told that the song was Radio Gaga by Queen. I guess the US wasn’t as in to Queen as Australia.

    • CutieKnucklePie says:

      Wow.. ::facepalm::

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      RedViv says:

      Barbarians! Savages! Heathens! Xenos!

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      Shar_ds says:

      Queen were very popular in America… until the video to “I want to break free”.. then they figured out that Freddy might be gay.. and y’know… “Queen”… can have more than one meaning…

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      darkChozo says:

      Hey, don’t lump all of us in with those malcontents.

    • CutieKnucklePie says:

      Talk about those “girls and boys who just don’t know or just don’t care”.. lol

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      Henke says:

      Yeah but did you recognize Waylon Jennings singing “I don’t think Hank done it this way”? Fitting soundtrack for an old-fashion criminal like Trev in a modern world. :D

      Man, I hope the K-Rose station makes a return. :)

    • Tams80 says:

      =O HOW?! How is that even possible?

      *some rant about how I’d expect no less if their games journalism is anything to go by*

  3. Cara Ellison says:

    I don’t think I’ve ever seen a game trailer so perfectly articulate ‘These are the three types of people we are trying to make our money from’. Kudos, PR. You know your shit.

    • pakoito says:

      Bored white people, gangsters and trolls. Pick your side!

      • kikito says:

        Trolls.

      • The Random One says:

        You misspelled “gangstas” (n. one who thinks criminals can become awesome and attempts to emulate their behaviour, usually in the safest way possible)

    • antumbral says:

      Extensive focus testing and analysis of successful TV series like Breaking Bad revealed that what the mass market (and in particular minorities) really resonate and engage with is privileged white men acting like jackasses, which is why Rockstar went out of their way to put TWO of them in this game.

      • Ravenholme says:

        I’m not sure an obviously crazy hick drug dealer counts as “privileged” but okay.

        • Eschatos says:

          He’s privileged because he’s white, duh.

          • Professor Snake says:

            There has to be a token asian and a token female, otherwise this game is to be declared politically incorrect and boycooted by intellectual people all over the world.

          • Iskariot says:

            So you think having ‘white’ skin pigmentation is a privilege in itself?

          • Fred S. says:

            There will be females not dressed according to Progressive Feminist Prude standards, and therefore the game is automatically to be disliked by all right-thinking gamers.

          • Ultra Superior says:

            White, yes, his name is Walter White.

            He is privileged, if you count cancer as a privilege.

            Know your telly, punks.

          • sinister agent says:

            He’s a university educated straight white middle class man in a wealthy suburb in the richest country on earth. He’s also – spoilers? – filthy rich, having so much money he literally can’t count it.

            I fucking love Breaking Bad, but jesus christ people. If you want a more privileged character you would have to take Walter White as your baseline and start installing lasers.

          • Ultra Superior says:

            If RPS was The Office, Sinister Agent would be Toby.

            Thanks for sucking the fun out with your relativistic comments!

          • noodlecake says:

            I agree about Walt. I’m not sure how white privilege helps working class white people. It might do a little bit but I’m pretty sure black middle class people have it easier than white working class people.Having being raised by my working class parents myself and being kind of destined to be an unmotivated stoner for the rest of my life as a result, and then moved in with some wealthy cousins and seen how different their lives are, class makes a huge HUGE difference. They pretty much re-educated me to have a chance of making something of myself (as opposed to jumping from shitty minimum wage job to minimum wage job for the rest of my life and spending all my spare cash on weed)

          • derbefrier says:

            @sinister agent

            He wasn’t rich until he became a drug dealer that’s kinda the whole point of the show… even the early episodes made a point to show his difficulty with making ends meet. he was working two jobs ( a school teacher which pays shit, and a car wash attendant which pays even worse) . I dont see anything “privileged” about that I would call it a hard working father doing everything within his means to take care of his family earning everything he has the hard way and not having it handed to him on some silver fucking platter that you seem to think comes with being a white guy.

          • sinister agent says:

            @derbefrier

            If you’re going to talk about privilege, you should really look up what it means first. Yes, the guy had problems. No, that doesn’t mean he’s not privileged. Privilege doesn’t mean you never have problems or difficulties, and only an idiot or troll would suggest that it does.

            Before he does anything, Walter doesn’t have to prove that he’s not a criminal or illegal immigrant or terrorist. He doesn’t get turned down for jobs because his name sounds a bit foreign. He doesn’t get criticised for speaking his mind, or accosted in the street by people demanding he take time out of his day so they can leer over his body. He’s not blamed for other people’s crimes and abuse because of what clothes he put on that day. He’s not called “ungrateful” if he doesn’t simper and thank people who address him in similar terms to the people who threaten to rape him. He doesn’t get ostracised, threatened, or beaten up for displaying affection towards the people he loves in public.

            He even – actual, slight spoilers (series 1) – turns down help from his multi-millionaire friends.

            That is privilege. No, it doesn’t make him a bad person or mean he never suffers or has problems. Nor does it mean he’s a weak, bad, or uninteresting character. But there is a whole world of criticism, oppression and abuse that he will never have to face because of the lucky demographics he happened to be born into.

            you seem to think

            Don’t invent things and claim other people said them. It should be beneath you.

          • smb says:

            “Yes, the guy had problems. No, that doesn’t mean he’s not privileged.”

            You justified the term by comparing specific problems certain stereotypes may or may not have to deal with. That works both ways. Each stereotype has its own unique set of privileges attached to those issues. A woman may or may not get accosted by a pervert. The stereotype says it is more likely for her to experience this than a man. On the flip side, will she be forced to live on the street if she cannot make ends meet? Not very likely, considering the countless female-specific shelters and programs willing to help her, let alone a society that is apologetic towards her decision not to work. But if she does end up on the street, is she assumed to be a drunk, violent, good-for-nothing druggy like the “homeless man” stereotype details?

            “Privilege” spins a fantastic tale about the green grass over yonder, while ignoring the trials required to keep that grass green. It is truly an immature view of the world, relying on the negative aspect of stereotyping to subvert honest effort made by the majority of successful individuals. It lacks the understanding of why these stereotypes exist, or the fact that stereotypes are not steadfast. Every situation is different, every person unique.

            The human species has a certain trait that allowed us to prosper and advance for thousands and thousands of years: the ability to act outside of what our surroundings tell us to do. For example, commoners did not secure the right to freedom by merely complaining about “privileged” nobility, they proved that these benefactors were unneeded by denying their claim to power.

      • frosty2oo2 says:

        they all look privileged…..

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        PikaBot says:

        If you think that that’s the appeal of Breaking Bad you’ve clearly never actually watched the show and are just casting judgments on third-hand impressions and what you see in television commercials.

    • noom says:

      Personally I think Trevor looks like an amusing character, and one who fits far better with the massively sociopathic behaviour encouraged in GTA games. There’d be less of the ludonarrative dissonance – as that Mr Clint Hocking put it – playing as him.

      The other two do seem somewhat trite though.

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      Lol- this is great.

      That comment is worth gold. And the idiots are only so happy to oblige.

  4. Premium User Badge

    RedViv says:

    Hey it’s a GTA IV sequel. Someone alert me once we have one to Vice City, okay?

    • lordcooper says:

      I believe that was San Andreas. You can tell by the way it came next.

      • Hairball says:

        I’m sure he meant one with an American, Caucasian male main-character which he can relate to. Either that or, judging by his avatar, an anthropomorphic child pony.

        • TCM says:

          Who took a hot metal rod and shoved it into your anus this morning, dude?

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          darkChozo says:

          As I recall, you’re 1 for 3 there at best.

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          RedViv says:

          I can relate to a lot of characters. I would prefer it if devs show some creativity though, instead of repeating the same generic blandy-blends over and over.
          And hey, I’m “allowed” to like cute widdle ponies because I’m just a silly-willy girly-wirly. Though, again, I’d prefer if people had a wider range of “appropriate” interests represented in games. Preferably so wide that there is no “appropriate” anyway.

          • Hairball says:

            Fair enough, I wrongly presumed you fell into the annoyingly large “I don’t like it because I can’t relate to a poor black male from the hood” category (which would be made worse by coupling it with an ability to relate essentially non-human characters). In terms of scope and scale I felt it was an appropriate sequel, what makes it unfit in your eyes?

          • TCM says:

            Why do you feel you deserve any credit here? Mind, I can’t speak for Red, and would not presume to, this is just my opinion.

            You made a wrongful assumption about a person going off of a vague statement about their tastes in games, and moreover, tried to insult somebody by leveraging things they like against them, with some notion that it must be insulting to have it thrown in their face.

            You are representative of everything wrong with RPS comments, and the internet as a whole.

          • Brun says:

            IIRC the biggest complaints about San Andreas were feature bloat and the fact that it got just a little too silly (jetpacks and Harriers as vehicles), even as GTA games go.

            Personally it was one of my favorites, but Vice City was a very difficult act to follow because of how well the 80’s culture was executed and how perfectly it fit with a GTA game.

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            RedViv says:

            @Hairball
            Just don’t presume then. Unless someone states something to the effect of “Man I don’t want to play no ennword”, don’t react as if they did. Also, don’t sling somebody’s interests at them to supposedly discredit them. Serves nobody really. Buuuuut internet comments, eh? :P

            Anyway: San Andreas was too silly for the supposedly added gravitas, GTA IV went for an even more serious and “real” setting, that in the end led to me (and apparently quite a few others) being rather tired out due to how the game really just stretched and went on and on and on. On top of that we have those weird gameplay elements that Rockstar deems totally grand ideas. Less random fun, more pure appeal-free silliness that only seems nonsensical for a “real” universe, and some really peculiarly off-putting, like the fitness stuff in SA or socialising in IV. It’s just a mess if, within ten minutes, you blow up 50 cops and gangsters happily, then throw a few bowling balls, and then are told how horrible and dreary life as a criminal immigrant is.

            tl;dr Stylised psycho games are good, “realistic” games in that manner have to this day only been rather off-putting, and Rockstar North seems to have less of a grip on consistent fun. Which is not exactly nice for a sandbox game.

          • Hairball says:

            Sorry about that, the reasons I’ve seen people give for it not being a proper sequel have usually included racial or cultural differences between them which has always irked me somewhat. Though me becoming jaded with “internet comments” and making assumptions like that isn’t really helping the problem though. Back to GTA then:

            GTA IV was a step backwards in my opinion and a definite departure from what the series was but it wasn’t what I was referring to.

            San Andreas, in my opinion, was a decent sequel. GTA always had feeling of pushing an open-ended sandbox to its limits. Vice City added planes, helicopters and other systems to GTA3. It got extremely goofy at times, “sillyness” was always a part of the GTA games; tanks, kill frenzies and monster trucks were in the first game. San Andreas, with a larger scope and scale was able to push what you could do even further.

            The fitness system definitely could have been handled better but the “active” progression systems (bike skills, etc.) lent themselves to a rising ability to control the world and do larger, riskier and more insane things as the game progressed.

            San Andreas was never a “realistic” game and built on and added to what made Vice City great as well as trying a bunch of new things (not all of which worked). I don’t really think it’s fair to say it’s not a sequel to Vice City.

          • Brun says:

            The silliness fit better in Vice City since the game was meant to be a caricature of the biggest excesses of 80’s culture. San Andreas’ tone – including the setting, storyline, etc. – was much more muted, or at least it tried to be more muted. When things started to get insane and ridiculous in SA it felt like there was a disconnect between what you were doing and the setting, whereas crazy antics felt right at home in Vice City.

            I also think that Vice City benefited a great deal from the place the 80’s holds in modern popular culture. The stereotypes about the 80’s are extremely well defined and have been endlessly played out in some of the most popular and enduring movies and TV shows from that era. Even kids who weren’t old enough to remember the 80’s at all could immediately recognize and appreciate the setting. Contrast that with the 90’s setting of San Andreas – the game was only separated from the 90’s by 5 or 6 years, so there hadn’t been enough time for the 90’s to gain an pop-culture identity on the same level as the 80’s. Like any period in history the 90’s had its particular cultural quirks but being less than a decade past at the game’s release they didn’t feel interesting. As a result the setting felt rather bland – to the point where the game could have been set in the “present” day (i.e. 2005) and it wouldn’t have felt much different.

          • blackmyron says:

            Disagree on the 90s sensibilities of San Andreas – it seemed to capture the early 90s for me, perfectly.

            It’s the “traditional” GTAs – namely GTA III and GTA: Liberty City Stories – that seem to be unstuck in time.

          • DestroyYourEgo says:

            None of you wankers can relate to ANY of the characters.

            Other than being a choadish male focused on himself, what about youself do you see in these characters running around killing hookers and cops?

            I’ll tell you- nothing! You’re a fu¢kin’ loser, Bobby, and nobody likes you.

            Seriously, I’m not being cute here- you’re not that great, as a human being. Which one of you am I talking about? Pick.

          • DestroyYourEgo says:

            None of you wankers can relate to ANY of the characters.

            Other than being a choadish male focused on himself, what about yourself do you see in these characters running around killing hookers and cops?

            I’ll tell you- nothing! You’re a fu¢kin’ loser, Bobby, and nobody likes you.

            Seriously, I’m not being cute here- you’re not that great, as a human being. Which one of you am I talking about? Pick.

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      Lambchops says:

      I concur, Vice City was my favourite and I’d like a return to its more gloriously silly attitude rather than the attempts to make the tone more serious in GTA IV (I’m sure I’d like some of the GTA IV expansions but the fact I didn’t bother playing much of the game itself meant I didn’t feel inclined to buy them). As for San Andreas it was just too big for the sake of being big and just didn’t quite work for me.

      Vice > 3 >> IV > San Andreas

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        darkChozo says:

        I went back and tried to play GTAIV again a couple months ago, quit, and played through the expansions instead. Honestly, I think that the problem with the game wasn’t its tone (TLAD has a darker tone, if anything, and worked better than the main game for me), it was the pacing. The core GTAIV game is really, really slow and is really fragmented.

        Most of the story arcs in IV basically consist of doing a bunch of odd jobs for some guy for little pay-off. Some of them have little-to-no impact on the major arcs. Many of them just kinda trail off, usually to be return to several hours later but sometimes not. And the fact that there were often 2-3 story arcs running at the same time meant that you were doing a lot of useless jobs at once.

        In terms of gameplay, the power curve was also really slow. It takes way too long for you to get anything interesting, and while that’s not necessarily bad, it wasn’t done well. TLAD did it much better, while you were limited for most of the game to relatively weak weapons and such, they gave you a bunch of little perks that made up for it. BOGT went kinda all-out from the start, but even it gave you a trickle of cool little things as the game went on, much better than how the core game did it.

        • Beemann says:

          Pretty much the entirety of this
          I actually liked GTAIV, but I did find that the main story line tended to drag on quite a bit longer than it needed to.
          That said, this three character business could address that issue rather handily. Instead of putting all the focus on one much-too-long story, they can have three properly paced stories with certain points of overlap

          I think that sort of approach could work far better than the single character narratives from previous titles, especially when (as been pointed out in the comments section already) the inclusion of a ridiculous sociopathic character can cater to those who enjoy chaos but not the ludonarratie dissonance that comes with lamenting a life of crime after going on a massive senseless crime spree

  5. Hungry Like the Wholphin says:

    At some point they’re just going to release these as movies and give up on the games

    • CutieKnucklePie says:

      Too bad they would make terrible movies too. This stuff is so trite and tread-over it’s not funny. I wish crime games aimed for something like The Wire.

      • Triplanetary says:

        Well, GTA4 seemed to be trying to make some kind of point about the tragedy of trying to live an honest life but getting dragged into crime etc. etc. But the gameplay freedom to blow away fifty civilians with no long-term consequences (shortly before agonizing over murdering one scumbag!) kind of kills any of that narrative intent. Rockstar is so wed to the sandbox gameplay of GTA that they won’t sacrifice it for the sake of narrative, though. Which I guess is fine. But nobody was taking GTA1 and 2 (or even 3 or VC) seriously. They can have the ridiculous gameplay or the serious story. They can’t have both.

        LA Noire, for all its many, many, many faults, at least manages to strike a better balance here (eg, you can’t mow down civilians, because you’re a frikken cop).

        • TCM says:

          GTA4’s primary theme is about the hollowness of the ‘American Dream’ for the majority of people who come searching for it, very relevant, and fairly well written.

          Mind it does so with some of the heaviest gameplay and story segregation in recent memory…

          • Triplanetary says:

            fairly well written

            …for a video game? Otherwise your standards for “well-written” are incredibly low.

          • TCM says:

            For a AAA action game.

            It has its moments here and there, but comes off cringeworthy more often than not. Still, I at least get what they were going for.

          • DickSocrates says:

            It wasn’t well written. Well written implies it didn’t drag on for 10s of hours longer than the story could sustain or that it didn’t go off on idiotic tangents purely to make the game long enough.

            I would dearly love for the Housers to try TV or movies and have their stuff judged properly.

          • DestroyYourEgo says:

            “It has its moments here and there, but comes off cringeworthy more often than not. Still, I at least get what they were going for.”

            Nikko is definitely THE MOST cringe worthy protagonist I have never heard of. And I got the “trying to live an honest life”. I just thought the execution of said heartfelt story was about as flawless as a deaf/blind kindergartener’s macaroni painting.

      • sqrrl101 says:

        The Wire game?
        Press X to drink yourself to sleep after a day of futile battling with an uncaring bureaucracy!
        Press Y to realise that the war on drugs is an utter failure and yet there is no way of stopping it!

      • Snids says:

        The Wire is perhaps the absolute pinnacle of fiction relating to crime and certainly the most effective piece of entertainment discussing social issues in an urban setting.

        It is perhaps a little bit naive to expect a computer game to be able to match it.

        • DestroyYourEgo says:

          Jeez, could you make your comment a little more pretentious?

  6. The_B says:

    This looks like a Grand Theft Auto game.

    • Premium User Badge

      maninahat says:

      But not a grand Grand Theft Auto game.

      Or even a great, grand Grand Theft Auto game.

      Yuck; much of a muchness by the looks of things. I find it hard to get into these open world GTA style games unless there is an interesting theme and an attention to detail. That’s kind of why I prefer the Mafia games, despite their less than decent sandbox gameplay.

  7. Kollega says:

    Ah, a GTA game set in Los Angeles. It’s like a really bad movie set in Los Angeles… except it’s not a movie. It’s a game.

    Well, at least it isn’t about cops like movies set in Los Angeles usually are. That surely has to count for something, am i right?

    • Fluka says:

      It looks like a profoundly unexceptional movie, except the characters’ lips don’t move quite right.

      • Bent Wooden Spoon says:

        Given the amount of cosmetic surgery in Hollywood these days, characters’ lips don’t move right in unexceptional movies either.

  8. engion3 says:

    Character expressions sort of remind me of the Sims.

  9. HisMastersVoice says:

    “That’s out in September. Probably not on PC, though. They’ll do that a few months later.”

    Not sure why RPS continues to give R* the free publicity considering how they treat the PC platform. Is this some kind of abused spouse syndrome or what? They don’t like us. They don’t give a fuck about us. The only reason we might see another buggy PC version is because T2 has a modicum of business sense and they know it will sell no matter how bad it is.

    • greenbananas says:

      +1

      And I thought the sceptre nowadays was Saint’s Row’s, anyways.

      • WoundedBum says:

        One good port and we love them? With assloads of DLC and stripped down from 2? I like SR but…hmm

      • kikito says:

        By “sceptre” you mean the big purple dildo, right?

    • S Jay says:

      Let me answer you: because it helps with SEO and because if you don’t, a lot of people will look to the same information elsewhere and get all pissed off because RPS didn’t post about the trailer bla bla bla.

    • Snids says:

      A release date for a PC game is just the release date for a PC game. Why do people take it personally when a PC game is released after consoles? I don’t give a shit. I’m not trying to keep up with anyone.

      GTA4 was a buggy PC game. That apparently got fixed.
      RDR never game out so is not a PC game.
      All the GTA games have been released on PC.
      Max Payne 3 was excellent and there was nothing to complain about there.

      What do you want from them? Some sort of human sacrifice to you on a mound?

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      They probably still get some money out of the deal, so they don’t hate R* as much as you are led to believe they hate R*.

      Only a fool would believe people (especially people with a website funded by mostly ads) has any room to be discriminative (even if they had been discriminated against themselves).

      Though this article IS accurately written…

      Long and veiny: they got paid to write this, and were more than happy to write that about the PC, even if it might go against their personal views. Money gotta make money, you know?

  10. Kieran_ES says:

    IGN are having a live event (with included pre-show) to analyse this trailer frame by frame. I can’t even.

    • calendar_man says:

      Just went to ign…Fuck I thought you were kidding.

    • Tyrone Slothrop. says:

      Yeah, you tell ‘em, those fucking nerds passionate about games deciding to actually analyse footage for details, losers! … Wait.

      • Koozer says:

        I think it’s the fact it’s being done live that’s most miff-worthy.

      • Kieran_ES says:

        Yeah that’s clearly what I have a problem with.

        I just think the way they balance between huge ‘everybody knows what the fuck this is’ games and everything else is skewed way more than it should be, even for the biggest games site. Point is, I don’t think the event itself is inherently dumb (though actually YEAH I DO) just symptomatic of the bad job they do at balancing coverage and allocating resources between big pub games and indies. The minutia of a big pub game, the barest details of the occasional indie.

        (oh and no matter how ‘passionate’ you are about games, there is never much reason or value in doing a frame by frame analysis of a AAA trailer, c’mon, have you watched one of their things? Inane)

      • P.Funk says:

        I remember when they analyzed the GTA4 trailer that someone saw some squat little outline near a bench and there was this kerfuffle about whether or not there’d be children in the game, and then of course whether or not you could shoot them or run them over with an ambulance.

        It turned out to be like one of those concrete posts you put in a drive way to keep cars from driving there or something. Was pretty funny.

        Its like the thing that CNN does after a school shooting when they ceaselessly analyze every minuscule detail they have, becuase in actual fact there are no details and the story should probably be a 30 second summation and then not be discussed much more than to give periodic updates.

        SOOOO funny.

  11. lordcooper says:

    To be fair, it shouldn’t really need to show any gameplay. After so many iterations I think most folks have a pretty good idea what’ll be in GTA V.

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      Thank you- your point is valid.

      If that’s the case, why are we even still playing this then?

      “Cos it’s fun”. Yeah, right. About as fun as a lobotomy.

  12. Premium User Badge

    tumbleworld says:

    Stop me if you’ve heard this one before.

    So, Michael Madsen, Generic Square-Jawed Black Guy, and Steve Buscemi walk into a series of bars, strip clubs and restaurants, and lots of psychotic men scream at each other. Oh, and allegedly there’s a game involved somewhere, but that’s being REALLY well hidden so far.

    Frakking hilarious, right?

    • S Jay says:

      I think it is thin Tony Soprano, Will Smith as Fresh Prince of Bellair before Bellair and Jack Nicholson Joker without makeup style.

    • CutieKnucklePie says:

      Yeah to be honest these guys are such trite stereotypes it’s hard to be interested in any way. Rockstar seems to think that stereotypes+”edginess” equals great writing.

      • DestroyYourEgo says:

        They weren’t sure which generic stereotype to make the main one, so they said, “we’ll sausagefest this thing up”!

    • kikito says:

      Steve Buschemy is great though.

  13. DiamondDog says:

    Not sure at what point I’m supposed to get excited by any these trailers. Might as well be live action for all they are worth.

  14. mrmalodor says:

    I think there won’t be a PC version this time.

    • ulix says:

      There definitely will.

      And before you cite “Red Dead Redemption” as an example: that game was developed by Rockstar San Diego, and their last three games before RDR (including Red Dead Revolver) didn’t come to PC either.

    • Werthead says:

      VICE CITY sold 7 million copies – a third of the total – on PC alone. I haven’t seen hard figures for GTA4, but apparently it’s sold very well and it continues to sell now whenever Steam does a sale for it (there’s one on at the moment, for GTA4 and all of Rockstar’s other games), with Rockstar continuing to make money out of the PC version long after the console sales tailed off.

      Rockstar will only not release GTA5 on PC if they have lost their interest in making a lot of money. Hell, if they released GTA4 on PC when most PCs couldn’t even handle it and was at its lowest ebb as a games platform and still sold a ton of copies, they’d be flat-out insane not to release it into the current, much healthier market. In fact, after MAX PAYNE 3’s example, I wouldn’t be surprised if the gap was only 2-3 months and not the better part of a year like last time.

      • DestroyYourEgo says:

        “if they released GTA4 on PC when most PCs couldn’t even handle it”

        What is this lunacy you speak of? My CPU could handle it just fine. It was bug-ridden. That’s design flaw, not my cpu’s.

        But go ahead, keep strokin’ their dick, you flocker.

  15. norfolk says:

    It’s hard to know without seeing any gameplay, but I for one think it looks pretty dope. I mean, it’s a good setting, the voice acting and music are awesome as always, and they’re exploring both classic archetypes (retiring criminal) and newer ones (drug dealing rednecks). As far as AAA games go, you could do a lot worse. Color me pink. Or whatever.

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      “looks pretty dope”?

      Thank god you aren’t paid to write reviews.

      NEW plan- you SHOULD write the review of GTA5. You might help sales…>snicker snicker<

  16. db1331 says:

    I can’t bring myself to watch it. Is it another one of those trailers that’s clearly made from footage of the game running on a high-end PC and then a “Play it best on Xbox” at the end like Skyrim?

    • Delixe says:

      Yes and no, no mention of formats at the end. The recent build was confirmed to be running on a PC but as the Meerster said it’s highly unlikely we will see it till late 2014 at the earliest.

  17. Premium User Badge

    lorddon says:

    Someone should take this engine, gigantic budget, and voice acting, and maybe do something different. Like a game about someone going to LA to try to break into show business. The game revolves around networking, making friends, going to readings, hitting parties, working shitty shifts at a cafe to pay the bills.

    You know, something besides killing hookers and hitting strip clubs after running over pedestrians.

    • S Jay says:

      Good luck with your Kickstarter campaign.

    • CutieKnucklePie says:

      Maybe a game based off David Lynch’s LA? I’d so get behind that..

      • Premium User Badge

        DrScuttles says:

        Or maybe a game based on Lynch’s Rabbits. With the budget of a GTA game. That would be quite the thing.

  18. WoundedBum says:

    Looked good to me. A more exciting GTA IV. Thought there was plenty to show what you’ll do.

  19. SkittleDiddler says:

    Going by Rockstar’s more recent releases, GTA V will consist of short ten-minute bursts of gameplay interspersed between tons of chugging, unskippable cutscenes.

    Do we really want this on the PC?

    • WoundedBum says:

      Just MP3. Consider GTA is open world.

      • SkittleDiddler says:

        You forgot to mention L.A. Noire. Cut scenes and playable bits, though nowhere near as atrociously put together as MP3.

  20. Daryl says:

    Well I do enjoy the GTA series. It’s hard for me to get hyped over another game though. It doesn’t look bad, just kinda more of the same GTA. That’s not necessarily a bad thing; I will probably buy it at some point down the road when it’s on a Steam sale. I just can’t get excited over this.

    This is all contingent upon Rockstar actually releasing the game on PC. If they don’t, then I won’t consider it a huge loss. If they do, Rockstar needs to give us a proper port this time and not the poorly-optimized mess that GTA4 was at launch.

  21. Jimbo says:

    If only you could go bowling with the mobsters.

    • CutieKnucklePie says:

      Come on people now/smile on your mobster/everybody bowl together..

    • OfficerMeatbeef says:

      Absolute best use of this gag I’ve seen in a long time. Bravo.

      Speaking of, it hit me recently: isn’t it kinda weird/crazy that for all the silly minigame/activity stuff they shoved into GTAIV, there wasn’t any table tennis?! Rockstar has generally always been clever about integrating mechanics/elements from previous properties into their new GTAs, and THEY LITERALLY MADE A GAME THAT WAS ENTIRELY TABLE TENNIS BEFORE GTAIV. I hope the only explanation is it took them another 5 years to properly rework GTA’s engine to handle the level of table tennis fidelity we’ve come to expect, nay, demand.

      • DestroyYourEgo says:

        This “table tennis” game you speak of sounds like a more competent game than GTA5.

  22. Urthman says:

    There’s like 90 seconds of that Trevor character in the trailer and I’m already sick of him. What a terrible voice actor.

    It’s a shame Rockstar earned all that money from the GTA games and decided to quit making games and instead do these self-published vanity movie projects. Because they’re pretty good at making games but they really, really suck at making movies.

    • Asurmen says:

      What’s wrong with him?

      • DestroyYourEgo says:

        Exactly the same thing wrong with Nikko- he’s not that likeable as a protagonist.

        God, you WANT the character you’re stuck playing as to be that way all the time? You, sir, either have a high tolerance for annoyance or are just ______________.

        Fill in the blank with what you see fit at the end of that statement. I can bet it was nicer than anything I would have said.

  23. P.Funk says:

    I didn’t like GTAIV. I actually loved The Ballad of Gay Tony though.

    Maybe GTA should stop doing mega stories. Maybe they should stop trying to be the Sopranos meets Goodfellas on a Godfather trip. Maybe they should do mini games and campaigns set in a mega world that is smaller tighter and ends before you can get tired of it.

    TBOGT was just short enough that I was sad it was over and wanted more. Always leave them wanting more. Lately GTA is more like, always leave them with at least 1 island to unlock and content that will remain incomplete for at least a few months after purchase til they get bored and play it through, probably at a point in time when they’ve forgotten the story up til their latest save anyway.

    Short and sweet. You probably can’t sell people on that though. Not epic enough at an E3 rally.

    EDIT. watching this now, its so obvious they’re just ripping off movies again. Michael’s trailer has a blatant reference to the “Heat” armoured car heist. I mean… at least TRY to do something original, please? In a 3 second cut I saw the exact same thing that Michael Mann did in that scene. SHEESH!

    • TCM says:

      People already (incorrectly) complain games are too short, despite, what, an average of a 38% completion rate on steam games people own? I think that might be overestimating, too.

      • P.Funk says:

        I still think TBOGT is decently long if you don’t just burn through it. It was probably shorter for most people since they’d already played GTA4 enough to have done all their cruising pointlessly starting manhunts for them with full police heat.

        The point is not to do small games, just small stories. Tie them up early and keep them high quality. Release a full game with 3 full stories that are totally isolated and contained. They’re already kinda doing it here, but its obvious there’ll be character connections. I don’t know if you’re the same guy or play as all three at some point, but I’ve always found that GTA games would start to feel thin on story after the first island. You’d find yourself flying all over the city or region and suddenly it made no sense to be there.

        It would be cool if it was like TBOGT, which mostly focused on the Manhattan island. The story remained focused on relatively simpler plot issues and so it tied them up mostly without going off into some new area where your whole reason for being there was tenuous at best. TBOGT still had so much crazy hijinx that it felt like a concentrated dose of Vice City without the burnout every GTA game gives me.

        The GTA4 stories model was actually ideal, except that I didn’t like the lost and the damned much. But the way the stories intertwined with the ones in GTA4 proper and TBOGT without being technically linked as a single campaign was really neat.

        Maybe thats the direction they’re already going in, but its obviously more credible from a story perspective to not be jumping around all of San Andreas doing everything with one character. Its hard to make it all interesting. I’d rather have 3 good short stories in the massive game world than 1 that ties into EVERYTHING in a not very convincing way.

  24. motherpuncher says:

    I just want to cruise around the city on a sweet motorcycle, is that so much to ask?

    I will say, besides 3 I have never finished a GTA game. I always enjoy them, but at a certain point they tend to get too repetitive. The Lost and the Damned is great though.

    • kikito says:

      I just want to play as the dog. Bite people in the face, piss on streetlamps, smell asses, and flap my ears when looking out of a moving car window. And hear everything the humans say as “WOOF, WOOF”.

  25. Col says:

    I hate to be “that guy” but the amount of sneering this has received for less than 4 minutes of video is really quite silly. Oh do you think it looks violent and macho and is imitating crime movies? What an astonishing observation to make about a GTA game!

  26. Radiant says:

    PLEASE have lots of stuff to do.

  27. Curly says:

    There’s no need to show gameplay. You know what you’ll be doing. Chasing indestructible cars down predetermined paths. Tailing a car to its destination, restarting if you get too close. Shooting hundreds of men in the head. Bringing down a helicopter with a rocket launcher. Manning a turret. Robbing a bank.

    The desert looks gorgeous. Shame there’ll be a GTA game there.

  28. Tasloi says:

    I like the Franklin trailer. Probably won’t be getting it if / when it’s released to PC though. Not my type of game.

  29. BreadBitten says:

    Was it just me or did seeing Franklin in a white tank-top exiting that house bring back memories of seeing Carl walk into his old house, for anyone else?

  30. Mathute87 says:

    What a shocker, there are commenters that consider themselves above those who enjoy the GTA games. Keep yawning, keep hating. Who gives a damn?

    Only game left this year that actually manages to get me kind of hyped.

    Besides, as with every other 3D GTA game, these are mostly cutscenes with rendered scenes froms stuff happening in the game. Most of these big non-talking, action scenes will be gameplay.

    • Urthman says:

      I love GTA games. It’s the GTA movies I have to sit through to get to the games I can’t stand.

      • Upper Class Twit says:

        Awww, I kind of like the GTA movies. I though Nico was an interesting character, and I found the writing to be entertaining. What’s so bad about the GTA movies anyway? They were skippable. I think

    • blackmyron says:

      I love GTA games. Having said that, I found GTA IV to be profoundly dull and overshadowed by DLCs that had much more interesting stories. Rockstar also treats PC owners like garbage, and I don’t see that changing any time soon.
      So, I don’t plan on buying GTA V. Considering that SR4 will be coming out the month prior, I can’t say I particularly even care that much that V is coming out.

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      Well, isn’t your little pea brain easy to please.

      i mean, seriously, this is THE LAST game of 2013 you’re looking forward to? Sheesh- you shoulda prayed harder that the world ended in 2012, then- ‘cos this is THE worst game of 2013.

      It was THE BEST game of 2000. After doing the same thing with a different facelift each time gets old- just ask Charlie Sheen.

      This game is as abd as the people that are excited to play it (or my spelling of the word “bad”).

      Play on, losers, play on- they respect you for it. And Rockstar is about the extent of that respect, as they only respect your wallet- not your person.

      Wokka wokka, as they say.

  31. UpsilonCrux says:

    I had assumed we would see the facial capture technology from LA Noire in this. Seems like they missed a trick there. Any ideas as to why they didn’t? Rights?

    Edit: I really need a new keyboard with a functional “p” key.

    • BreadBitten says:

      Budget management would be my first guess.

    • ulix says:

      Because it’s inferior.

      Sure, the face look great. But the actor’s performance has to be captured twice. Once their body movements (traditional motion capturing), and once their facial animation (they can’t move at all in that contraption).

      The footage is then combined by an animator. Obviously acting won’t be as good if the actor can’t really “play out” a scene physically.

      So it was an artistic decision. A good one.

      • UpsilonCrux says:

        Good point, I hadn’t thought of that. It’s a real shame about the lack of a concurrent PC release, with the last few from the “4” series, I was totally burned out on it after either seeing most of the game in vids or having played bits on the various telly-game-boxes.
        By the time it was badly ported to PC I just didn’t really care anymore. Also, the grahics in that trailer seem to me to be less impressive than what we saw before in the teaser or whatever.
        On a kinda related issue, whats the deal with this Watch Dogs? I mean, is it a “next-gen” game or what? It’s being released on current-gen, and PS4 as of the latest trailer. How does that work? Is the current-gen version gonna be the equivalent of a PS2 release of a PS3 game? Or is it just lies?

    • fish99 says:

      LA Noire wasn’t by Rockstar, they just published it.

      • BreadBitten says:

        Negatory. Both Rockstar North and San Diego contributed to the game’s development, and the PC version was handled entirely by Rockstar Leeds.

        • fish99 says:

          The PC version wasn’t the lead platform and came out much later, so that was just a port basically, and yes I know Rockstar contributed to the game. The game was still primarily developed by Team Bondi though.

  32. Tei says:

    I approve of this. Many different reasons not stated here. I like.

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      You’re an impotent man-boy who see’s himself in one (or more) of the characters, thus further validating your sad life as someone stuck in a perpetual state of arrested development, much like the game series itself?

      But that’s just me going out a limb here…. am I in the ballpark, or what?

  33. frosty2oo2 says:

    so any theories on what outrage this one will cause ?

    • walldad says:

      Judging from the comments it and anyone who buys it will be accused of racism and misogyny throughout video game writing land, right between the innumerable 10/10s it will receive, often from the same site offering the totally-original-do-not-steal insight that GTA games are amoral and crass.

      Of course, ad revenue has nothing to do with these sites working both ends of the so called discourse AKA the noble moral struggle against pop ephemera and marketing bonanza that comes along with another ‘controversial’ GTA title, and suggesting so will out you as an awful bigot.

      • DestroyYourEgo says:

        I won’t call you a racist or misogynist for liking this title.

        I will, however, call you an idiot because this franchise is as dead as the excitement for it, and only an idiot with thumbs that have nothing better to do with them will be doing this.

        get over it- the game’s not that great, and neither are you. But go ahead- you’ll pour your money into it. Puppets.

  34. walldad says:

    I want to re-assure you, internet comment-reader, that I am bored with GTA.

  35. Megakoresh says:

    Not_impressed.jpeg is all I can put forward to really any news about GTA ever since I finished Vice City.

  36. PC-GAMER-4LIFE says:

    R* are the masters of shitty boring cutscenes obivously current gen consoles cannot handle much more than a cut scene few mins of boring gameplay followed by cutscene again etc etc they also used the same crap on Max Payne 3 to hide the ingame loading.

  37. Michael Fogg says:

    That dry concrete canal again. It was featured in San Andreas, right outside Carl house at the beginning. Do they really have those running through LA suburbs?

  38. Premium User Badge

    strangeloup says:

    The first third of the trailer actually seemed quite promising, mostly because it was riffing off The Sopranos which is absolutely bloody great. The second third seemed to be… I dunno, maybe like they watched a couple of episodes of The Wire and figured that was worth copying bits of. And there seems to be a Breaking Bad vibe to the third part, though I’ve not really watched the show so I could be wrong here.

    The problem is I don’t think I like GTA. I’ve played all of the damn things because they consistently get very good to great reviews, I end up finding the game initially fairly engaging and lose interest fast, but every time there’s a new one I think it might be better. The GTA4 expansions, at least, were pretty decent, but I wouldn’t go much further than that.

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      They only get good reviews because they’re betting AN ISHT TON OF PEOPLE, like yourself, will go out and get the game based off of a few cohesive good (or even “glowing”- as they refer to it on the inside) reviews.

      Money across the board, as it were.

      I will say, the size of the cities is GTA’s ONLY saving grace- and honestly, I got bored with 4 (could not stand Nikko’s voice, didn’t want to run around hearing it all the time).

      Maybe if people just didn’t buy this title, the next GTA might pass for a good title, and not just another “tried but true”, by the numbers rip-off of the manliest-man stuff on the market today (Sopranos, Breaking Bad, Wire, etc).

      All in all- this is gonna be crap. I’d advise you stay away from it, but once you read one well-payed-for review, you’ll be all over it.

      I can’t lie, I played GTA4 because the reviews for it were shinning. I will not make that mistake again, as I literally disagreed with everything any review had to say (aside from the world being pretty- with ENB setting, it’s amazing).

      Sheeple being flocked hard, with no condom or a promise of a morning after- that’s all it is. Ya bunch of flockers!

  39. shadders says:

    Not even the RPS hipsters can make me change my mind….

    I’m looking forward to this.

    • blackmyron says:

      Not even the anti-hipsters snark can change my mind. I’m not looking forward to this.

      Everybody wins!

    • napoleon_in_rags says:

      My impersonation of 93% of RPS commenters:

      “Ugh, it’s getting released on a -console?- How mainstream.”
      *flips hair and puts on thick-rimmed glasses*

      • Premium User Badge

        Lord Custard Smingleigh says:

        I was hating hipsters before it was cool. Now everyone hates hipsters and that’s ruined it.

      • UpsilonCrux says:

        Says the man with the Dylan moniker. The ultimate hipster if ever there was one.

        • napoleon_in_rags says:

          ….Dammit, they’re on to me!

          ABORT! ABORT!

          • UpsilonCrux says:

            Hahaha, bravo to you sir, admirably handled.

            P.S. I’ve nothing but fondness for our Robert.

          • napoleon_in_rags says:

            Hah, it would feel wrong to get mad about someone calling me a hipster in a comment where I’m making fun of hipsters.

            And of course you are, since you’re the first to recognize where the name came from. Even if I did steal it from the most well-known song of his entire (really large) collection.

          • DestroyYourEgo says:

            This turned into a left-handed circle jerk REAL quick!

            Let’s all stroke our ego’s a little bit more, ya wankers!

  40. Laurentius says:

    It’s looking sweet. I love GTA IV as much as ony other GTA’s on PC ( actually more thank for awsome driving model, hope they won’t change it ). I still jump in form time to time for some chilling driving around LC. I leave games like Far Cry 3, Spec ops, Dishonored and Bioshock Infinite for you whining guys. GTA V is obviosly not for you.

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      I don’t care for NONE of those titles you mention, as I feel they are all a bunch of pretentious, man-child rhetoric.

      I was once a fan of GTA. I remember being enamored with it back on the PS1- in the form of GTA1/GTA London. Then GTA3 came out, and further changed my life as a gamer. I liked Vice City, but fell even more in love with San Andreas.

      Then 4 came out… and I heard Nikko’s voice. It was terrible. Though I liked the world of GTA4, I hated literally everything else.

      And this looks like it’s about to get worse.

      I’ll leave you flies to this steaming pile of shit. open your wallets and empty them out, please.

      And thank you- you’re right. GTA5 obviously ain’t for me. And I thank God for that.

  41. dmoe says:

    I can’t wait. This is going to kick so much ass.

  42. ChiefInspectorLee says:

    Without commenting on the writing of this trailer, I want to plump for the other side. I really like games-as-movies when they’re done with intelligence and production value. I thought FTL and Dishonored were the two best games of 2012, but Max Payne 3 was right up there at number three. It doesn’t make sense to me that accepting the value and interest of highly-cinematic games has to be an antagonistic position to appreciating games focused on freedom of choice and non-linearity. Both approaches can be fun, and both can be profound. Why the hate from RPS? It must come in part from a distaste for the idiot narratives of games like CoD, but come on, not all highly cinematic games are written in that style or about those preoccupations. Can someone help me understand why the genre in-and-of itself warrants all this hate? (Disclaimer: I am an American and have American cultural tastes; nothing wrong with that).

    • blackmyron says:

      Well, for one – Max Payne was a classic case of “INO” – In Name Only. Rumor has it that it was a generic-type game that got slapped with the Max Payne label to boost sales. Certainly it doesn’t hold a candle to the original Max Payne.
      GTA IV… where to begin? There’s the tedious minigames that Saint’s Row mocked ferociously in their trailer for SR2. There’s Niko being a thoroughly unlikeable and sometimes plain idiotic “protagonist”. There’s Rockstar touting the lack of “unrealism” like the jetpacks of San Andreas. There’s being a criminal in a world where the criminal always, always loses.
      Having said that, I enjoyed TLAD and BOGT, as they contained a lot of the elements that I liked about the earlier GTAs. I still don’t understand why the “DLC” – the entire city of Liberty City, for that matter – is separate from the main game. Although I know a number of people that bought the DLC pack and not the main game, so that might be the reason right there.

      • Werthead says:

        “Rumor has it that it was a generic-type game that got slapped with the Max Payne label to boost sales. Certainly it doesn’t hold a candle to the original Max Payne.”

        I’m not sure how that’s a rumour. Rockstar bought the MP licence years ago, long before work on MP3 began, and the entire game is crafted around Max’s story and the familiar bullet time mechanic. Also, the first two MP games sold relatively modestly (and it was a rare example of the sequel selling a lot less than the original, IIRC), so it could be argued that a completely brand new action title – perhaps still with bullet time – with a new character and background would have been a surer bet than a sequel to a series that hasn’t had a new title in ten years and, to the mass audience, is very obscure.

        In fact, MP3’s sales have been described as disappointing, despite shifting 3 million copies worldwide in its first month on sale. Rockstar spent a ton on that game (apparently it’s one of the very few to break the $100 million budget barrier) and it under-performed. It’ll be interesting to see if we ever get an MP4. If we do, I’m hoping that Rockstar will give it a lower budget and ask Remedy to do it for them as an outsourced project (Remedy and Rockstar are apparently on excellent terms), perhaps after the latter has done ALAN WAKE 2.

        • blackmyron says:

          It’s a rumor mostly based about the disconnect between MP3 and the first two. There’s nothing specific backing it up – and Deus Ex 2 is living proof that a sequel in a beloved franchise can be crap even with a Game Guru on board. Personally, I just take it as a proof of Rockstar’s declining ability to make decent games.
          I’m with you about a decent Max Payne game coming out again. I don’t know how they can continue from the second one, but MP3 wasn’t it.

          • Werthead says:

            To be fair I think Rockstar did genuinely set out to make a good MAX PAYNE game. They got Remedy to critique the game and provide feedback, which they didn’t need to do, and they did set out to create a story about Max’s character development as much as just blowing stuff up, just like the first two games. And we have to remember that the first two games were dripping with an over-abundance of cut scenes as well (though even at their worst they were nothing like as start-stop as MP3).

            What made the first two games a lot better was the OTT dialogue and semi-noir stylings, which MP3 failed to replicate as well. On the plus side, MP3 was a pretty self-contained adventure, with a relatively minimal impact on Max’s character, so Max can move on from it to further adventures (whether from Rockstar or Remedy or whoever) without too many problems.

  43. napoleon_in_rags says:

    Wow, I should really stay away from the comments on this site. So many heads shoved into rectums to depths that I couldn’t have even comprehended previously.

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      So many heads shoved into rectums to depths that I couldn’t have even comprehended previously.

      That should be the Internets motto.

  44. Rozay says:

    You ain’t gotta like it ’cause the hood ‘gon love it!

    Nah but seriously, you guys have bad taste. The open-world king is back. You should be sending R* thank you letters for saving your sorry asses from all the crappy open-world games that come out in between their games. This is going to be off the chains, yo.

    • Snids says:

      Agrizzled

    • DestroyYourEgo says:

      When I send my letter to Rockstar, it won’t be to thank them for this.

      it will be a compendium of thoughts on why I won’t be playing the game. And your eloquent comment will be the very first reason.

      Stupid, idiot demographic.

  45. Grape Flavor says:

    I know I can count on RPS providing great coverage of indies and other interesting angles that you are never going to get from a more conventional gaming site, but at the same time I can also count on RPS to snark and sneer loudly about the kinds of more so-called mainstream games the writers don’t personally favor, and not give them much of a fair treatment in their coverage.

    This is why I read other sites in addition to RPS. If I’ve enjoyed the previous GTA’s (I have) and the Metacritic score for this one lands in the mid-90’s, RPS can pour all the scorn in the world into their Wot I Think but I’ll simply shrug my shoulders and play the game anyway, because that’s just RPS being RPS.

    • Upper Class Twit says:

      Yeah, it does get to be a bit much at times, doesn’t it.

      Although I will say that there are plenty of sites out there that exist exclusively to pander to games like GTA, and Call of Duty, and Halo. The writers here may take a bit too much pride in vocally looking down upon those sorts of “mainstream” games, but at the same time they’re doing their own thing with gaming journalism, and filling a niche that would probably be left empty without them, so i can respect that.

      • Snids says:

        I think Alec is being Alec.

      • DestroyYourEgo says:

        Lol!

        They don’t hate these games because these games are “mainstream”, silly rabbits.

        It’s that, quite frankly, these games suck (GTA, CoD, Halo). Any Helen Keller can see that!

        That’s what you call a “teachable moment”. No need to thank me- I already know.

  46. jonahcutter says:

    The last great GTA was Vice City. You played as a genuinely sociopathic Ray Liotta. The story fit the gameplay perfectly. And it still had the Dukes of Hazzard physics to add to the cartoonishly violent atmosphere. It all worked as a greater whole.

    The more they tried to make the game about a good-guy protagonist, the more the model falls apart. San Andreas worked because of the excellent writing and voice talent. But it still suffered from the disconnect between a basically nice protagonist and the kill-hundreds-of-innocents gameplay. Plus the changed the vehicle handling and physics into something more “realistic”, losing the Dukes of Hazzard physics that made Vice City so much fun to race around in.

    IV was just a mess. Same nice-guy protagonist disconnect. But the writing was far weaker. Most of the characters forgettable. And dating? Bowling? Surfing the internet? Yeah, that’s why I buy a GTA game, to drunkenly play pool.

    Saint’s Row has figured out the open-world criminal model, and embraced the absurdity (to an absurd degree). GTA seems stuck between it’s sociopathic model and its reluctance to embrace it fully. Or to institute in-game consequences for acting like a sociopath. A GTA game that had a reputation system that lasts throughout the entire game (and isn’t easily negated) is a game I’d be interested in playing.

    • napoleon_in_rags says:

      The disconnect between ‘nice guy’ (even though Niko certainly wasn’t one of these. Didn’t play enough San Andreas to speak for that other dude) protagonist and killing 100’s of innocents was created by you. I played through the story of GTA IV without going on some mindless rampage, which for some reason people think is a necessity of playing any Grand Theft Auto. Sure, I still killed a boatload of people, but most were criminal underling types, and it is possible in IV (unlike in so many other shooting games) to shoot to wound instead of to kill.

      Now, once I was done with the game and wanted to mess around, I had no problem going on the most horrid of rampages. But that’s another story! It might be because I was slightly late to the GTA party, but having played a bunch of them afterwards, I really do think GTA IV was the best one made.

  47. IndigoHawk says:

    Gaming sites need to report on games as if they are reporting for the benefit of the people who are interested in those types of games … instead of bashing games for being what they are. Those are good cut scenes, and those 3 characters bring back several GTA themes. This is quality GTA characterization, production, and presentation, with everything fans want, including an upgraded strip club. Nice choice for the soundtrack, too.

    Give GTA credit for what it is, even if you’re like me and think GTAIV was boring and Saints Row made the genre fun again.

  48. Prime says:

    I think I’m done with GTA. Over. Finished. It was fun while it tickled the parts of me that thrilled to driving fast cars and shooting loads of dudes but I found IV so tedious on every level that it was like discovering a tiny shivering man behind the booming and terrible Wizard of Oz; the curtain fell away and suddenly the once proud franchise just seemed to lose all attraction. Either that or I just grew out of it.

    For what you have been, GTA, I will always salute you but I think our association is ended. A’ the best.

  49. Snids says:

    I feel a bit insane because I thought it was fucking brilliant and I can’t wait.

    So games can’t be like movies? Why not?
    Games can also be like games.
    Games can also be movie like games.
    It’s like asking TV shows to not be like movies.

    I can’t remember a move that follows a person around for hours from a third person perspective as he completes tasks.

    OK it’s a bit of a shame that there isn’t a protagonist that’s a woman. It’s a shame that the back guy is a gangsta but GTA has always been derivative of crime movies.

    Franklyn’s stuff looks well written and not painfully cartoonish and ignorant.
    Michaels stuff looks well written and looks like it’s exploring some interesting Sopranos ground.
    Trevor looks like a Glorious A-Team Murdoch/Hunter S. Thompson/Jack Nicholson hybrid.

    Stop being such a load of grumpy tedious boring sweater-vest special pen library book tuppaware grey trouser men

    • napoleon_in_rags says:

      Yup. It is the natural evolution of any art form to have a faction develop that think only they know what the ‘right’ way to do it is, and that the medium is being ruined by its growing popularity. Thankfully, this cynicism has rarely won in the past, and I doubt it will this time around either.

    • Prime says:

      So games can’t be like movies? Why not?”

      While games and cinema can and do share and express the same themes it’s usually the architectural aspects of both that don’t mix well, leading to the oft-discussed “Narrative Dissonance”. When Dev studios focus on ‘cinematic’ aspects, such as complex emotions or critical moments of action, gameplay and/or the player experience often suffers as a result, at the very least reducing you from active particpant to mere bystander. GTA IV was the most cinematic of the series so far but also the most problematic when examined from an overall narrative and gameplay perspective.

      It’s like asking TV shows to not be like movies.

      Not really. TV is so very close to cinema architecturally – they’re both mediums of passive consumption, requiring no input from the audience. Games are very different beasts, with unique characteristics distinct from passive tv/cinema watching. It’s why you’ve never played a Merchant Ivory game but TV is swarming with that type of drama and why there isn’t an FPS on your TV.

      I can’t remember a movie that follows a person around for hours from a third person perspective as he completes tasks.

      You’ve provided an answer to your own question here: this is one of many reasons why games and movies are difficult to blend.

      Franklyn’s stuff looks well written and not painfully cartoonish and ignorant.
      Michaels stuff looks well written and looks like it’s exploring some interesting Sopranos ground.
      Trevor looks like a Glorious A-Team Murdoch/Hunter S. Thompson/Jack Nicholson hybrid.

      My impression of the trailers is “More of the same”. I think after seven or eight games in the series now, the conceptual aspects of the series might be becoming stale, making it harder and harder to innovate or generate excitement. The higher fidelity of the presentation notwithstanding there’s bound to be no surprises coming from GTA V whatsoever. You can already reliably predict the structure of the game and the activities you’ll be engaged in. It’s become as iterative as the CoD franchise, and look to how that series detrimentally eroded gameplay through excessive adherence to cinematic elements as a warning for what could happen here.

      I completely agree that the fact of there being no female protagonist is a major crime and an utterly wasted opportunity for some badly-needed innovation. Women aren’t portrayed very well in GTA games, treated in just about every instance as secondary or tertiary concerns to the male protagonsists, and lumped into the usual reductionist gender roles; Oooh, look – MORE strippers. Lots of fun could be had from the subversion of the criminal genre’s tropes but again R* choose white guys and a black guy as their heroes. It’s been done before, a million times. What’s to get excited about?

      Speaking personally, I’m finding that I’m tiring of the same old, same old. GTA IV arguably wasn’t even as good as the preceding games, after the alterations to driving and the shooting mechanics. While I lapped up San Andreas I found IV really dull, over-long, overly concerned with story and didn’t like leaving the player alone to enjoy him/herself without bothering you with bizarre and ultimately hollow ‘relationships’ with your cousin and others.

      If you think that’s me just being grumpy then so be it. I’d prefer to think that my feelings are based on a strong rationale, and I’d wager that so are those of many other commenters.

  50. Daniel Klein says:

    This trailer left me frowning and confused. We’re supposed to like this why?