By Kieron Gillen on July 13th, 2008 at 1:31 pm.
Zoological mishaps are becoming a perhaps unexpected theme in recent gaming, what with IGN’s announcement of Squids not being animals and all. It continues with Brett Graham’s Fruit Mystery. Brought to our attention by Jonathan “Braid” Blow over at Qt3, it’s a high-drama flashgame about trying to feed various animals fruit. It’s highly educational. “I’m not entirely sure what just happened to me,” said Alec after I forced him to play it, “but I’m never feeding animals fruit again”. Truth.
In associated news: Squids are one of the four fundamental forces of the universe, alongside the Weak Force, the Strong Force and Gravity.
Go Superconducting QUantum Interference Devices!
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This game is pure liquid terror. On a side note, you get the same ending no matter if you feed all the animals zero fruits, so apparently the gorilla is just going to have to hate me until time itself grinds to a halt.
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What the utter fuck did I just play? Haha.
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I’M SORRY STEVE!
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GOTY.
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Educational AND entertaining! 100% out of 10 stars. Plus.
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I’m going to have nightmares now.
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THAT MAN IS THE MESSIAH OF STUPID!
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I’ve learnt a lot today and it’s only just gone three
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OH NO! My eyes bleed! My ears bleed!
make it stop!
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Limbo of the Lost finally has some competition!
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It reminded me a bit of the league against tedium, a poorly spelled incarnation thereof anyway.
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What. The hell.
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I’m sorry about all the you know…fruit…..and stuff, Zoo Keeper Steve. :(
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Crumbs.
I don’t know what I was expecting, but that wasn’t it.
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surely a monkey can eat a banana
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This is one of those “the only way to win is not to play” games, only with polar bears choking on olives instead of armageddon.
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Wow.
So.
Fucking.
.. Awesome.
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This is the best thing I have seen all week.
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i won!
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Steve looked happy, even though he was sad inside.
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I didn’t even feed the animals! Noooooo!
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Haha, it’s JeffK all over again – only interactive. :)
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But the Lion/Tiger likes the lychees…
…even if he did die maybe…
…but I’d do it again!
I REGRET NOTHING, ZOO KEEPER STEVE!
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*sigh*
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Terrible and lacking in the funny department, it makes some of the worst stuff on Adult Swim look like legitimate humor.
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Say what you like, killing a snake with a pineapple is as hardcore as you can get. Sorry Steve but I don’t regret what I’ve done. Sorry about making them do a deadly poo.
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Say what you like, killing a snake with a pineapple is as hardcore as you can get. Sorry Steve but I don’t regret what I’ve done. Sorry about making them do a deadly poo and getting you fired from every job ever.
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I hate you…
… for making me click that link =P
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That is the DUMBEST DAMN THING I have ever seen in my life.
Ever.
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Bizzare
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That said, I ate a lot of fruit yesterday, and they weren’t kidding about the dangerous poos.
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Jesus. Christ. What happened…
Its like an A.D.D. simulator.
What a nutter…
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SALTED CASHEWS ARE THE WORST THING TO FEED A LION YOU LITTLE SHIT!!!!
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Apparently dogs love them, though. No liquid poo!
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My god, I was in fucking hysterics playing this thing. Now I have a headache, too. Sorry Steve :(
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On the very rare chance that anyone’s actually looking for this, the website disappeared off the web a few months ago.
Fortunately, we have the Internet Wayback Machine: http://web.archive.org/web/20100128052758/http://home.wildit.net.au/hellohelloben/mystery.html
Also have a look at the rest of the website. It’s just as deranged as Fruit Mystery. There’s even his actual resume which he photographed on the floor.
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