Street-Cleanin’ Man: Street Cleaning Simulator

By Jim Rossignol on July 8th, 2011 at 1:00 pm.

Hello, ladies.
Discovering that this game existed was a moment of perverse joy for me. I knew that it would be deeply boring – it really is – and that I would have to play it extensively for no reason other than to take joy in being quite deliberately boring. It’s the kind of non-challenge I relish, and I gleefully set about compiling a diary of the events – or lack thereof – in the life of a simulatory street-cleaner.

Read on to find out how I got on with that.

The existence of banal, municipal or commercial activity simulators delights me in a way that I often struggle to articulate. I’ve already described it as perverse, and in some ways it is: I am not genuinely interested in the simulation, so much as the fact of a videogamelike experience that is not actually trying to be fun. The received wisdom that “games are (or must be) fun” has always struck me as a little empty, and when boring simulator games come along and are not fun – and are consequently enormous fun – I have always been unreasonably pleased with the paradox.

There’s also some genuine curiosity folded into this particular simulator. I always take some time to play truck simulators, or crane simulators, farming simulators, or whatever else the simulation industry throws out. But the idea that there was a simulation of something so obscure and so niche – let alone so unexciting – as Street Cleaning, really did intrigue me. What was going on in there?


Somehow this investigation was not a totally blank slate for me, either. A few years ago a friend of mine was working for our local newspaper. She wrote a report on the local street-sweeping machines, which are exactly the same as the starter vehicle in Street Cleaning Simulator (there are two other big and better vehicles to upgrade to.) The article was about some aspect of street-cleaning deployment, but the only fact she actually came away with was that the tiny, oblong machine cost £40,000 a year to run. She told me that fact, and now I end up thinking of it every time I see the street cleaning machine shuffle by. It is a brainworm of the kind you get when you attach a primary fact to something you know nothing else about: “You cost £40,000 a year!” announces my brain – the fact clicks into place like clockwork as soon as my senses detect the hissing contraption. The same thought sprang into my head when I saw the cover of Street Cleaning Simulator. We had a connection. And I could do something about it.

Perhaps now I would be able to learn a little more about this machine. Now that I was about to engage with it on a simulatory level, I might push past that brainworm and install new thoughts about the street-sweeping process. I would be able to study its habits, and to feel like I understood its world. The game immediately threw me, however, by making me not some kind of abstract controlling ghost in the machine, but an actual person. There I am, in my high-visibility clothing. I don’t look like I care too much about my appearance. Perhaps I don’t even care about my crap-defeating chariot. That would be a shame.

I am also alone. I notice there are two seats in the machine. I hope to be joined by another cleaner at some point in my experience. I will be disappointed. There will be no trash-talking RPG elements here.


We start, of course, with a tutorial. It’s surprisingly complicated, and unsurprisingly unintuitive. Up cursor key is the gas pedal, so of course pushing down does not throw you into reverse, as it generally does in videogames, and instead you have to manually change gears. Initially confusing, and ultimately frustrating. There are nine keys to control where the brushes are positioned, more for water spray activations, for lights (including indicators!) and for dumping collected gutter-waste from your container. The camera controls are comprehensive, too, because as I was to realise, adjusting the brushes is tricky when all you can see is the inside of your ride.

In the tutorial I run around the cruddy yard, refilling my fuel tank and refreshing the water tanks.

Okay.

The game’s missions are jobs which are emailed to you via an “office” in the yard, which is a menu screen that appears when you walk towards the doors. My first mission – and you may have anticipated this one – is to clean a street. Let’s do this.

I don’t really know what I was expecting, but the street cleaning experience is even less exotic than I had imagined. You really do just clean up that thirty centimeters of muck that appears in the gutters at the edge the street, where the pavement meets the asphalt. Sure, there are a few places where the crap decal is right across the street, but for the most part you are trundling slowly along the margins, hoovering up slightly darker, messier pixels. It’s slow. You are slow. It takes ages. A queue of cars backs up behind you. You have to stop at the traffic lights.


The city is boring.

Whoa! – I drove slightly too fast and didn’t pick up all the stuff in the gutter – but it’s okay I slowed down again.

This continues for a while.

Even my extensive tolerance for boring projects is up against a wall here. Street Cleaning Simulator doesn’t even provide enough mental activity to produce “The Reviewer’s Trance”, which is a mild mesmerisation-through-boredom which can often rack up large tracts of game time simply by keeping the hands busy and letting the brain disconnect from its moorings. Some games can be boring, but still busy enough. This one is not.

What am I going to do to pass the time while I slowly driving along the sides of simulated German streets? Eat? I’m all out of flapjacks. Listening to music? I guess it’s better than the dull drone of the brushes. Read Twitter in another window? No, that’s all my friends boasting about their exciting lives while I am sat inside being deliberately boring in a poorly translated sim.

Hmm. I’ve just got to focus and power through. It’s going to be okay.

The mission is over quicker than I expect, thanks to the fact that the game informs me that I can invoice for the cleaning before I have finished! I don’t know if this is some kind of meta-commentary on German street-cleaners being particular half-arsed about their cleaning responsibilities, but it’s okay by me. Screw that final seventeen yards of dirt, we’re making good speed back to HQ.


I wonder what the city council will have in store for me on the next mission!

Another street needs cleaning. Yeah, I know, but surely something must happen in this game? It can’t be street-cleaning with no jeopardy? No drama? Right? Surely there must be some sub-plot, some rival firm? Anything?

I turn around the orange box and trundle back into the town.

Doubt is creeping in. This game is even managing to defeat the purpose of a game diary. A diary is explicitly for recording events, and this is a game in which almost nothing happens. Hell, it’s a game in which almost nothing can happen. That’s what I wanted, I suppose, but now my perversity is beginning to balloon into a special kind of despair: What if there’s actually nothing at all to be gleaned from this? What if subjecting myself to the near-silent trundling through a simulated town of lifeless automatons births no insights, not even into boredom, or indeed, into street-cleaning?

I begin to think about boredom itself, and about things I have read about boredom. There’s actually at least one decent book on boredom, which I have read several times. It’s worth picking up.

Things spiral onward in time, like a weak cup of tea left to go cold in a grey room. The machine trundles along, picking up dirt, picking up dirt. As long as I occasionally correct its path, I have little to do.

I start Googling boredom. This is an amazing quote:

The essence of life is the smile of round female bottoms, under the shadow of cosmic boredom. 

- Guy de Maupassant 

That Guy de Maupassant guy was so right. That actually is the essence of life, now that I think about it. And I have plenty of time to think about it, because I am travelling along the side of a street at about the same speed the pedestrians are walking along beside me.

This simulator, however, isn’t even boring enough to -FUCK! My street cleaning machine has spun off the road and somehow become stuck half way up a traffic light! Action has found me, just when I’d written it off.


My street-cleaning character dismounts to survey the damage. It is unclear to me what will happen next. Out of nowhere, a sudden bolt of drama! I get back into the vehicle and try all the controls, but to no avail. Even the brushes don’t actually clip with the scenery, so there can be no emergent pushing myself back to rights with the tiny spinning arms. It looks pretty fatal, even despite (or perhaps because of) the total lack of damage model. I had assumed – thanks to the way the machine bounced around like a tethered balloon when struck by other vehicles – that actually flipping the vehicle or otherwise getting it into permanent danger was going to be impossible. Perhaps I was wrong.


Would I have to buy a new one?

Would this thing be stuck here forever like some overly expensive work of street-art?

Where might this disaster take us?

Find out in the next (speculatively speaking) installment of Street Cleaning Simulator, when we return to the awesome unmajesty of: Street Cleaning Simulator for more… street cleaning.

(Out now!)

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114 Comments »

  1. Premium User Badge

    Malibu Stacey says:

    Jim let me be the first to say you are a delightfully strange man but we love you for it all the same =)

    Also this really needs Quinns eponymous “this is a job that I have” tag.

  2. Dana says:

    im going to clean the shit out of these streets !

    • Stephen Roberts says:

      You’ll get me fired, you (this comment also extends to everyone else responsible here).

      I haven’t cried laughing in such a while.

    • gou says:

      Someday a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets.

  3. Flameberge says:

    John did say on twitter this would be the best thing anyone read this week. He really was right.

    Also:
    “The received wisdom that “games are (or must be) fun” has always struck me as a little empty, and when boring simulator games come along and are not fun – and are consequently enormous fun – I have always been unreasonably pleased with the paradox.”
    Really sums up how I feel about these type of simulators as well. I also extract a lot of glee from other people’s inability to understand my enjoyment of this type of thing. My lovely girlfriend at the time, herself a gamer, couldn’t understand at all why I enjoyed European Truck Simulator, and my explanations that I enjoyed it because it wasn’t enjoyable and had fun because it wasn’t fun were met with a displeased response.

  4. Premium User Badge

    sonofsanta says:

    £24.99! Check that out. And with a tag line like “Give dirt the brush off!”, how could any sane man resist when he sees it slotted neatly into the 2 for £15 section of GAME in 6 months’ time.

    I would be fascinated to read an interview with the developers here. What possessed them? How long did it possess them for? Are they inspired by their clean streets, or instead offended by their poor condition and seeking to inspire a new generation of street cleaners?

    EDIT: I’m sorry, I just read the list of features on the website and it is the single greatest run down of excitement I have ever seen.

    · Visit your office to learn what work the Mayor’s office has for you.
    · You’ll be operating on busy streets so you’ll have to use your driving skills to avoid pedestrians and other road users.
    · Remember to use your wing mirrors to help prevent crashing your vehicle.
    · Don’t forget to fill up with fuel
    · …and water!

  5. ZIGS says:

    My reaction when I saw the title: “Oh no they didn’t!”

  6. Vexing Vision says:

    I seriously hope this won’t feature as a steam sale.

    I wouldn’t be able to live with the shame of owning this, but there is also no way I could pass this as a sale.

    • wccrawford says:

      On the other hand, I am very much looking forward to seeing just such a sale because I want this game, but I’m not willing to pay that for it. One of those $5 Steam sales would be just perfect.

    • D3xter says:

      Put in a Summer Achievement and 3 hats to unlock and it would not only feature as a sale but might also make it to the top of the charts and be most played game for the day, it’s a sad affair xD

  7. Teddy Leach says:

    Oh, Jim. You’re so dirty.

  8. Cunzy1 1 says:

    Emergent Drama! This is even better than that book you wrote which Waterstones insists on putting in the literature section Jim!

    EDIT: I mean travel literature. Harsh.

  9. Stuart Walton says:

    Is there a multiplayer mode where P2 can walk alongside with the vacuum hose picking up discarded Special Brew cans and take away containers. When he’s not sat in the cab with a polystyrene cup full of greasy spoon coffee and a tabloid newspaper that is.

  10. Raniz says:

    What happens if you go mental about cleanliness and start running over pedestrians because they’re dirty and need cleaning?

    • Jim Rossignol says:

      Pedestrians just disappear when run over. A shame, I say. A shame.

    • Stuart Walton says:

      When you say ‘disappear’, do mean ‘grisly death at the bristle-tips of a day-glo street-demon before being swallowed up by said demon while nom-nom sounds are played’ or does the game just delete them.

      If it’s the latter then I have a challenge for the modding community.

    • Vague-rant says:

      The games seems full of social commentary. When you take away all the dirt, nothing is left of modern man.

    • RevStu says:

      “Pedestrians just disappear when run over.”

      In my experience this is also true of real life.

    • Ezhar says:

      This speaks for the machine. I bet the Sopranos would love to have one of those, even at £40’000 p.a.

    • pepper says:

      Stuart, my first thought was a Cleaning Machine Rampage – Get ready to get DIRTY! mod

    • arccos says:

      Is there a “reverse” lever so you can actually make the street even dirtier, and use the brushes to really dig it in good?

      And can you clean up road kill?

    • Eukatheude says:

      Street Cleaning Simulator: Hot Coffee

  11. Spider Jerusalem says:

    I wish this article was the first time I’d heard (and been excited) about this game.

    I wish so much.

  12. clive dunn says:

    Many years ago i actually was a street sweeper in Brighton. God, i loved that job so much. Everyday was different, i gained that civic pride thingy that i ‘d heard about, met some good people, did some good things, found some wierd shit and all of this whilst stoned out my gourd. I would happily play a simulator of that time.

  13. mbp says:

    Street cleaning machines are not banal and boring. Just remember the first time you saw one of these as a kid: The noise, the steam the hungrily spinning brushes. Street cleaning machines were and are awesome.

    You are going to have to try harder to come up with something genuinely banal. In fact I suspect that any piece of machinery at all in a game gives it some point of interest. Surely there are games out there about Chartered Accountants? What about “Insurance Loss Adjuster Simulator 2011″?

  14. karry says:

    “I knew that it would be deeply boring – it really is”

    So are the deer hunting games. And yet…

    • Jim Rossignol says:

      I’ve been playing one of those, too.

    • Stuart Walton says:

      Is it ‘The Hunter’ because that is the prettiest damn hunting simulator ever. Just look at those volumetric clouds!

    • MuscleHorse says:

      The mention of a deer hunting simulator just underneath Kieron’s name has reminded me of a review he did for PC Gamer back in them days. I think the title was Deer Avenger and you’d have thought the game gave him AIDS the way he went on about it.

      Does PC Gamer UK keep it’s reviews online, perchance?

    • Jason Moyer says:

      I’m surprised RPS hasn’t done a piece on “The Hunter”. Going by the screenshots/description it’s basically Stalker with deer.

    • Jim Rossignol says:

      Yes, I have been playing The Hunter, but not yet been inspired to write. It is not Stalker with deer.

    • D says:

      If you get a composite bow you can kill all the small ones you can find, without scaring any of the trophy cows away. Protip.

  15. bobbobob says:

    I expect the night-time missions are when it gets interesting. That’s when all the drunks and tramps will be out and about. Can’t wait.

  16. Ondrej says:

    This game is made by people with OCD for people with OCD. You all have OCD. (And so do I)

    • Cunzy1 1 says:

      I don’t know about OCD but dyslexia definitely. I had to read your comment four times to realise you weren’t talking about Call of Duty.

  17. Tusque D'Ivoire says:

    Yes, but does it have a steam summer achievement?

  18. dehimos says:

    Eh, this game is awesome, I created a trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MIx1NhsaGbE

    But with germany demo, I am poor :(

    • MartinNr5 says:

      You sure cleaned up the streets as well as all those unsuspecting cars!

    • Gar says:

      That video is hilarious, as is the top-rated comment. Well done!

  19. Forceflow says:

    In all fairness, in the graphics department, it looks quite nice for a … mundane-stuff simulator.

  20. atticus says:

    Makes you wonder which other ideas were thrown out during the initial “let’s make a simulation hit” brainstorming-session, if there ever was one. And how on earth are they going to make any money on this, apart from people buying it to mock it?
    Maybe German game developers get the same deal from the government making games as Uwe Boll does making films – basically, when using German labour you’ll be heavily subsidised no matter how crap your product is.
    Well at least the web-page at Excalibur Publishing does a great job marketing the game!
    “Don’t forget to fill up with fuel… and water… and empty out the muck from time to time.”
    I’m sure I won’t!

    • D3xter says:

      I suspect not very many… or if they did they’re probably somewhere on a piece of paper named “sequel”.

      They already did: Agriculture Simulator (2008 and 2009), Steinbruch Simulator, Crane Simulator, Bus & Cable Car Simulator (2008-2011), Spezialfahrzeuge Simulator, Demolition Company Simulator, Diving Simulator, Excavator Simulator, Fire-brigade Simulator, Garden Simulator, Garbage Disposal Simulator, Delivery Van Simulator, Ship Simulator (2006/2008), Space Shuttle Simulator, Tow Truck Simulator and even a U-Boat Simulator

      I shit you not: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Astragon_games
      Landwirtschafts-Simulator 2011 (or Agriculture Simulator) even sold over 1 million copies xD
      http://www.pcgames.de/Landwirtschafts-Simulator-2011-PC-235449/News/Landwirtschafts-Simulator-2011-Millionen-Marke-durchbrochen-Collectors-Edition-kommt-820651/

      And they’re saying PC gaming is dying…

    • Premium User Badge

      stahlwerk says:

      Atticus, as far as I remember these are made mostly by small eastern european developers and distributed by a swiss publisher on the german market (yay 4 europe!). And germans just love that shit, we really do. Somewhere in my genes is a sequence that encodes the desire to manually plot the optimal route for a Roomba. I guess we’re just the tinkering kind / easily parted from our money.

    • Premium User Badge

      Olero says:

      I wonder if the Space Shuttle simulation can be played real time…. If so, I demand a Space shuttle vs. Desert bus challenge!

    • pepper says:

      I demand the RPS group to investigate these games and report back on the spoils that can be found!

    • Dozer says:

      Space shuttle’s been done to death. There’s a few available for MS Flight Simulator, I think, to various degrees of actually-modelling-space-ness-ness, and the Orbiter sim, and I think there’s a standalone dedicated shuttle simulator for large £££. But operating the Space Shuttle’s a complicated and brain-tasking task. Nothing at all like driving a bus or a combine harvester.

    • Eukatheude says:

      I recall playing a very detailed space shuttle/spaceship sim called Orbiter a while ago.

    • atticus says:

      @D3xter: wow… that blows my mind, really. This must be the market nobody’s really paying attention to. Torchlight can bugger off, Agriculture Simulator broke a million without flinching and apparently has a Collectors Edition in the works as well. Oh my… PC gaming is far from dying, but it’s kind of sick though :)

      @stahlwerk: haha :) Sorry, I hope I didn’t offend you with mentioning Boll. Nothing against Germans, just hate the system that keeps him productive!

    • Brutal Deluxe says:

      Can we have an MMO addict simulator please?

  21. Feet says:

    Jim – you made me laugh out loud at work. I then had to explain why I was laughing to the person sitting next to me. This should have been awkward but I could not stop laughing. Excellent written comedy timing.

  22. AbyssUK says:

    A GTA IV mod/DLC needs to be made asap… rival street sweeping gangs fighting to keep the streets of liberty city clean..staring the voices of chuck norris and steven segal.

    • pilouuuu says:

      I was thinking the same. It would be cool that in GTA V we are able to do this job to earn some cash. This would be great as part of a bigger sandbox. This is the sort of thing that I never expected to see simulated. What’s next? A game about being a librarian?

  23. Elmar Bijlsma says:

    So this game exists but a serious Age of Sail simulator does not?
    The mind, it is boggled.

    • jRides says:

      This game exists but a serious Epic 40k scale game does not?
      My mind, it too is boggled.

    • Superbest says:

      @jRides You had mine boggled at “serious 40k game”.

    • Plopsworth says:

      Yes. +1 to the age of sail simulator.

      Something like Silent Hunter, except with 32-gun frigates during 18th and 19th centuries. Bonus points for large real-time multi-hour ship of the line scenario battles with relayed signal-flag communication. Extra bonus for the ability to walk up and down and inside your command.

  24. Premium User Badge

    SeanybabeS says:

    Thank you Jim, just, thank you.

  25. Freud says:

    Doesn’t all these simulator games have one thing in common? Boys and their fascination with big machines. Trucks, trains, excavators, farm machines, street cleaning machines, fork lifts etc.

  26. Shadrach says:

    The street-cleanin’ man in the last shot looks remarkably like Graham Smith :)

  27. speedwaystar says:

    ‎”All the animals come out at night – whores, skunk pussies, buggers, queens, fairies, dopers, junkies: sick, venal. Someday a real Street Cleaning Simulator will come and wash all this scum off the streets.” (Travis “I had that Martin Scorsese in the back of me cab once” Bickle, Taxi Driver Simulator)

  28. speedwaystar says:

    for a a more action-packed sim experience, perhaps Garbage Collection Man? you’d ride on the back of the truck, jump out and physically WRESTLE the garbage cans into the compactor, fighting off diseased rats and the like. i’d play it.

    • inawarminister says:

      Then Garbage Disposal Simulator 2008 would be right up your alley!

  29. Superbest says:

    Oh wow. This is why I read RPS. You guys do great gaming journalism, sure, but this right here? It’s art!

  30. Ross Angus says:

    Commented in wrong place!

  31. Premium User Badge

    stahlwerk says:

    Reply Fail </2010>

  32. metalangel says:

    I love mundane simulators! I should apply for that RPS job and be mundane simulator diary man.

    • Gundrea says:

      Good god yes I would pay RPS to let me review all these simulators.

    • metalangel says:

      That must be where I’m going wrong… I’ve been buying them myself. I should submit my Farm Simulator diary and see if they’re interested.

  33. Jad says:

    Heh, your random factoid of knowledge about a mundane civic vehicle reminds me of my father, he works for the city sanitation department. Not as a garbage man, but sitting behind a desk all day, doing budgets in Excel and such.

    Anyway, as a result, he has a vast compendium of trivia in his head about the exact specifications, capabilities, and prices of the (surprisingly varied and large) universe of waste collection vehicles (both front-, rear-, and side-loading), trash compactors, dump trucks, street cleaning vehicles, snowplows, snow and ice melters, etc.

    We also always had weird paraphernalia from equipment vendors trying to sell their highly specialized wares: I definitely have a t-shirt somewhere advertising an apparently very exciting and state-of-the-art high-volume snow melter.

  34. Premium User Badge

    Lambchops says:

    I’m sure street sweeping simulator might be marignally more interesting than column chromatography simulator (though that could just be a bitter organic chemist talking!).

    Excellent article Jim I’m on tenterhooks for episode 2!

  35. Jesse L says:

    Let me know when they get to Street Cleaner 2192.

    (http://www.pcgamer.com/2010/08/28/crap-shoot-traffic-department-2192)

    Thanks, Jim. Too good.

    • Richard Cobbett says:

      I would love to see a game like this with Velasquez in it.

    • Jesse L says:

      Dispatcher: Vel, you can’t take that sweeper out, it’s too badly damaged!

      Velasquez: If you don’t clear me now, it’s going to be your shit splattered all over the street…along with the rest of you.

      I had that game when I was a kid. One of those random presents from Dad. He had no idea what he was buying – but then, who would expect Traffic Department 2192?

    • pepper says:

      Heh yeah I also had/have that game somewhere. I do remember getting some enjoyment from it as a wee little lad.

  36. lokimotive says:

    It would be great if this was some sort massive misdirection on the developers part. Like, after 20 hours of mindless unintuitive street cleaning boredom you randomly find a body in the middle of the street and the game changes into a massive open world sandbox game involving international intrigue.

    • zxc says:

      You just blew my mind.

    • Esc says:

      I’ve often dreamed of a game that is billed as an open world farm/hunting/survival simulator. Tons of harvest moon/out hunting making a campfire killing deer to live simulation goodness. The terrain is expansive and beautiful and one day cycle you decide that you have enough saved up to play hooky and see how far towards the horizon you can make it.

      And you find a ruined temple.

      Inside are steps down.

      And suddenly there are THINGS attacking you! And you realize there is much much more to explore all around you and you get pulled into a grand quest.

      Unfortunately you can’t do gameplay surprises like that, the news cycle demands it. Why would you intentionally hide the most interesting part about your game?

    • Fiatil says:

      I’ve wanted a good graphical version of Unreal World for so long, so long…..

  37. Hoaxfish says:

    So, this is basically Call of Duty + Mario Sunshine, right?

  38. Premium User Badge

    Wanoah says:

    The burning question that I’m sure everyone is still waiting to hear answered is this: how does it compare to Fork Lift Truck Simulator?

  39. fallingmagpie says:

    Reads like a seven.

  40. mike2R says:

    Does the box art have a picture of a man in a US sheriff’s uniform, giving a thumbs up and sporting a moustache that reveals his deeply repressed homosexuality. With a tag line of “Lets clean up this town!!”

    And if not, why not?

  41. Xercies says:

    God that has to be the best quote ever!

  42. Premium User Badge

    thedavehooker says:

    Daggett would be all over this.

  43. Eddy9000 says:

    Getting rid of waste products can actually be very culturally meaningful:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwTJXHNP0bg

    I’d love it if Zisek designed a computer game…

  44. Zeewolf says:

    Fun writeup.

    I’m often the first to defend games such as this, because I know from personal experience that games about boring and mundane things can be extremely fun. The eighties and their 8-bits taught me that. And The Sims, I guess.

    But this particular breed of German sims are usually so shoddily put together that even when they’re about something that sounds quite exciting on paper they always disappoint. Quite why Excalibur, who’ve actually released a number of gems (including Space Rangers 1+2) over the years have decided to spend so much time bringing this crap to the English-speaking markets I will never understand.

  45. Snargelfargen says:

    Anybody who wants to learn about street sweeping should read this:
    http://www.scribd.com/doc/35488069/Chronicles-of-Bruiser-Tales-of-a-Street-Sweeper

    Way more entertaining than you would expect, and it might make a pretty good game.

    • Snargelfargen says:

      Also, did nobody notice this at all?

      “There will be no trash-talking RPG elements here.”

      heh

  46. lijenstina says:

    I think that this song is a perfect soundtrack for this game. :P

  47. Synesthesia says:

    Amazing writing, man. I couldnt stop laughing through a big part of it. I also like the bits when you ask yourself about the perception of games necessarily being fun. That’s something i’d read about.

  48. noom says:

    More of this type of thing please Jim. Your boredom is my joy.

  49. Agrona says:

    This was glorious.

  50. Plopsworth says:

    I’m actually kind of interested since this noble game emulates a part of how this poor starving student spends his summer – depending on the assignment. Anyone know the vehicle roster? It’d be kinda neat if it had the Schmidt Swingo 250.

    Actually, it’s not that challenging in real life either. Controlling the individual brushes and water spray is the only really fiddly bit. And – yes, despite their modest utilitarian appearance, they really are expensive (used: 40000€ upwards plus the running costs mentioned in the article), heavy (~3500+ kg), complex and surprisingly fragile. It’s not all that mundane in real life since you’re concentrating on (in order of priority) a) not fucking up b) actually cleaning shit up c) monitoring the dials and stuff d) other traffic. The commutes are the worst bit when you’re limited to 40 km/h which others have very little patience or understanding for.