Author Archive

Free Loaders: There’s A Storm Coming

A series of bizarre typhoons struck coastlines in dozens of countries last week in a global phenomenon many are calling the ‘Ludum Storm’. The tempests appear without warning and produce a heavy downpour of free games, leading many to suspect the Ludum Darists to be somehow behind the surreal weather. Our sources say that elements calling themselves ‘the 35th Division’ have taken responsibility for the storms. Forecasters are warning people to stay inside, close their windows and to play only “safe, expensive videogames.”

Read the rest of this entry »

A War In Space: The Banker Who Gambled Everything And Brought Eve’s Greatest Empire To Its Knees

A brigade of pirates, a gambling kingpin, a temperamental fleet commander and the financier who brought them all together. How one very rich man and his cartel of allies dethroned the most notorious leader in EVE Online [official site] and scattered his once-unstoppable army of ‘Goons’.

Read the rest of this entry »

Who’s Who In Eve Online’s ‘Northern War’

Eve’s new war is a mess. It’s such a mess that the combatants can’t even decide on a name for it. The forces on one side are calling it “World War Bee”, referring to the bee icon the Goons have used as a mascot. While the leader of the Goons has called for it to be dubbed “The Casino War” referring to the money-men behind it all, or more recently the “War of Sovless Aggression”. We’ve opted for the neutral “Northern War”. It is very difficult to keep track of these things. If you aren’t up to speed and don’t fancy reading our in-depth special feature on the conflict just yet, we’ve rounded up the major figures from either side right here.

Read the rest of this entry »

Free Loaders: Dodge Taxes As The Prime Minister

In reality, the Prime Minister has no agenda. Just the word 'SMILE' permanently inscribed on the back of his hand.

When we launched this column, I named it “Free Loaders” in reference to getting stuff for $0 and also to “loading” games. But do you know who the real free loaders are? That’s right, THE PANAMA PEOPLE. Next week I am going to Panama to see if I can see some of their papers for myself. In the meantime, here is a game about just that, made at the Nordic game jam, where the free games juegoterrorists have regrouped to make an uncharacteristic stand against tax evasion.

Read the rest of this entry »

Free Loaders: You Have One New Message

Five people were maimed yesterday after a pack of free games escaped at an illegal arena and ran amok. The games were due to be released into the ring one by one like bulls, police say, where they would face taunting and death at the hands of a trained handler. But when one of the games figured out how to unlock its cage, it created havoc behind the stalls, releasing seven other games and goring several bystanders. The games are still loose. If you see any of these, seek shelter immediately.

Read the rest of this entry »

The Division: The Crafting System Explained

One of the handful of things The Division does not bother explaining to its players is the crafting table. This can cause a lot of people to basically ignore it for the entire beginning of the game. Luckily, the crafting options are far more exciting in the later stages than they are early on. And if you have been hoarding materials like fabric, tools and weapons parts, then all the better. But it can also be worth your while at a low level. Let’s look at how to make the most of this unassuming mechanic and the peaceable little trooper working behind that desk.

Read the rest of this entry »

The Division: How To Make Money

There are three types of money in The Division, which is interesting when you consider that the plot is a thinly-veiled criticism of material greed. Here is a game in which the “dollar flu” has crippled the financial capital of the western world and it turns out to be an MMO-like murderthon about getting more stuff. I don’t know if the game is clever or if it just lacks self-awareness. Anyway, here’s how to make loads of money. The Recharge Station upgrade in the Tech Wing will also increase any Dark Zone funds gathered by 10%, but that’s less important early on.

Read the rest of this entry »