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4 days ago
Feature: Who watches the watchperson?
If I was really lazy I would just write "you know Her Story? It's like that but more," and call it a day. But I'm not lazy. I am a diligent and enthusiastic employee of Rock Paper Shotgun, and that sentence would be a bit of an oversimplification of Sam Barlow's new watch videos 'em up Telling Lies.
5 days ago
Feature: MOBAball
“You said you’d be here three hours ago,” my friend barks down the phone. It’s 5:30pm and I’m wearing a Harry Potter dressing gown, nursing a lukewarm coffee, and entering my 30th consecutive futureball match. “Sorry about that lad,” I say, feigning remorse. “I’ll be there in a bit.” As you’ve probably realised, I’m not Steve Hogarty. I’m just filling in while Steve’s on holiday.…
Feature: Teenage mutant whinger hurdles
Wot do I think? I think the return of words like "rad", "tubular", and "bodacious" are less welcome echoes of the 1980s than the returning threat of nuclear Armageddon, for a start. As such, it's with a particularly glowering eye that I turn to RAD, Double Fine's new action game about bashing mutants in the face (or face-like area), whose title is pretty indicative of…
1 week ago
Feature: Shape Fear
Few things are as terrifying, or as potent in piercing morning’s sedate veil, as the sudden outburst of an adult Canadian man, shrieking “THE SHAPE. THE SHAPE IS COMING,” through your desktop speakers. In the Canadian adult’s defence, however, one of those few things is The Shape itself: the Big Bad of stealthy co-op spookfest The Blackout Club. A relentless spectral apparition, only visible as…
2 weeks ago
Feature: A right huff
I probably didn’t grow up when you did. I feel the need to get that out of the way early, because this review is largely going to be about how Ion Fury’s old-school sensibilities clash with my own. Not all of them, I should stress. Shooters have trended towards a slower pace, while I'm a nippy boy. It feels good to shoot and hop. I’m…
Feature: Prepare to die
There is a happy Saturday morning feel to Dicey Dungeons. It's as if you’re munching on Coco Pops and watching cartoons, as you fiddle with some toy dice that came free in the cereal box. This is a sorta-deckbuilding game about being transformed into a walking, talking dice and battling creatures on a rigged game show for a chance to "SPIN THE WHEEL" (the wheel…
Feature: Hell hath fury to spare
Often I think my life would be better if it operated as a roguelike, where I could wait as long as I needed before every step I took, to consider all possible moves before committing to one. In practice, the ability to pause time for a think would be a kind of living hell. At age three I would become wracked with decision paralysis for…
Feature: Moon on a stick
A million years ago, on some African rock, our hominid ancestors gathered around a perfectly smooth black rectangle, and gazed upon it in awe. Beneath the surface of that strange artefact, lights and colours moved. The hominids looked on, stricken by wonder, and witnessed the perfect space sim. We can be sure this happened because, as a species, we seem to have an instinctual idea…
3 weeks ago
Feature: Investing in the cloud
I love a game with a bank in it. I don’t know exactly when this happened to me, at what point I became horny for economic stability above all else, but that’s just how tedious my adult life has become. I’m now less excited about the cool stuff that happens most often in games – like strangling your dad to death on the precipice of…
Feature: A glowing space crystal in the rough
I’ll be honest, I came dangerously close to not recognising Age Of Wonders: Planetfall for what it is: a solid, well-designed strategy game. Like a jaded ogre examining bones for shreds of meat, I nearly tossed it aside with a grunt, letting it plonk down the bone-hill into the Steam refunds ossuary. But then, I would have missed out on the rich, dense marrow within.
4 weeks ago
Feature: Are you a duplican or a duplican't?
During its two year stint in Early Access, Oxygen Not Included often came close to becoming one of my major time sink games. It’s a rich simulation of the kind I adore, with an enchanting art style, a unique atmosphere, and a labyrinth of features to discover. On a gut level, I love it. But then, for every time I’ve booted it up, there have…
Feature: More orphan than not
Science. What a concept. It’s put men on the moon, chopped up an atom good and proper, briefly eradicated measles and edited the very building blocks of the human genome. But one field of science still eludes even our cleverest minds. What, exactly, is a scare? Well, as far as the boffins can ascertain using the best microscopes available, a scare is a kind of…
Feature: One of the most stubborn stains
I’ve put in dozens of hours into as many Metroidvania games at this point, and whenever I play them I get anxious. Mostly about getting hopelessly lost, failing to circle back for something important, or forgetting the extensive and mostly unspoken rules the genre has developed over its history. After playing Bloodstained: Ritual Of The Night, I think I’m starting to properly get the appeal.
1 month ago
Feature: AM sees kitchen
I was doing it all wrong. My first few hours with Automachef had me proper wound up because, basically, it wasn't Factorio, and thus has different goals. That's entirely on me, of course. Although a mere glance at Hermes Interactive's new robot kitchen game is enough to make the similarities obvious, Automachef is very much a puzzle game. And it's a bloody good one too.
Feature: QTEs are the baddie taping your eyes open so you're forced to watch
The year is 2019 and I have never played a David Cage game. Sure, I said, I can review Beyond: Two Souls. It will be a good opportunity to see what all the fuss is about, both negative and positive. I’ll keep an open mind. That open mind, like all best-laid plans, did not survive contact.
Feature: Don't mech me go back
Every time you find a new gun in Wolfenstein: Youngblood, B.J. Blazkowicz's twin daughters gush about how their daddy killed a bunch of Nazis with it. "Cor", Jess will say, "remember when Dad told us about all those Nazis he vaporised?". "Yeah", Soph will respond, "that was tubular." When I think about how best to sum up Wolfenstein 2's co-op semi-sequel, tubular is not the…
Feature: Nominative determinism is a hell of a thing
Look, I'm loathe to describe any game as 'broken', even if it's a convenient shorthand. Since there are no word limits on the internet, I'll say that the main thing preventing me from enjoying A Place For The Unwilling is that currently there are dozens of little things that don't work quite the way they're supposed to, and while they don't exactly stop you from…
Feature: Reap what ye explode
Hey, it’s me. I was gone for a while, but now I’m back. Back to prematurely evaluate some early access games, like an impatient baker wrenching open the door of an oven and plunging his fist into a molten ball of uncooked dough. Like an open heart surgeon dialling down the anaesthesia to wake his patient up while they’re still on the operating table, just…
Feature: Through obscurity to success
Week 3. The invasion has failed, but I'm still alive. What cruel fate awaits those of us who assail the walls of Castle Shotgun but are not slain? But they still have to catch us first. In the meantime, I comfort myself by tearing through the endless round up of the best new games on Steam. It is time, it is always time, for Unknown…
Feature: Apes out
The streets are in chaos. There is a police officer beating a slum dweller. A red-shirted gangster has started an ill-advised stabbing match with three members of a rival blue gang. And an ape, recently escaped from captivity, is calmly watching it all, unable to speak the language of these terrible people. Amid such bedlam, what do you do as a player of Streets Of…
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