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Have You Played... Mall Quest?

Shop till you drop

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Have You Played? is an endless stream of game recommendations. One a day, every day of the year, perhaps for all time.

Mall Quest [official site] is a special hell, a sprawling vaporwave mall filled with poorly-labelled products, garish decor, and pink fog. In your hands, a shopping list of items you must find and buy so you can leave. This is hell. This is my hell.

While you can guess which shops sell what you’re looking for, you don’t have a map. And you’ll need to approach every item to see their name. And mallgoers will start filling the place with litter, which you can slip on and lose money. And hoodlums will start filtering in to rob you. But it’s fine, just find the five items and get out. Try to remember where you saw that Windows shop. Try to figure out where the corners are to get more cash from ATMs. Try not to lose your cool between the frustration and the harsh lights and the muzak and oh god I’m going again.

You can find and buy items that’ll help you run faster and jump higher, but doesn’t that make the torment even more frantic?

This is my hell but I keep going back every now and then, just to check. I popped back to take that screenshot and yep, yep, it’s still hell and I still can’t resist dashing through these shops and chatting to shoppers.

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Alice O'Connor

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When not writing news, Alice may be found in the sea.

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