Cardboard Children - Board Game News

Hello youse.

There is SO much board game news right now that we really have to do another column that is about BOARD GAME NEWS. Company mergers, massive releases, re-prints, you name it – it's all happening in the wide world of sports we call "Board Game Sports". (We don't call it that.)

Read on!

BOARD GAME NEWS

TALISMAN – THE WOODLAND

Okay, you know I love Talisman, right? Well, Talisman is a fantasy board game that features a big old map you walk around. And expansions have expanded that map at three corners – extending out to the mountains (in The Highlands), a rough and tough dungeon (in The Dungeon) and a cool as hell city (in The City).

Right around the corner now is the FINAL CORNER. The Woodland brings a forest to the game, and a nice new Light and Dark Fate mechanic that allows you to change your own rolls and mess around with the rolls of others – it also brings a rich flavour of Dark/Light supernatural encounters in that lovely faerie woodland setting. I can't wait. I mean – I seriously can't wait. Can you imagine having all of that stuff out on the table? The main board and four big corners? Fields and hills and forests and deserts and crags and towns and villages and dungeons and cities and mountains, with every game a different experience? And then there are the mini-expansions too! Day and Night, a werewolf roaming the plains, Death himself stalking you, fire genies burning up the world as you move through it, the land covered in snow, the nether realm spilling out in front of you?

MAN. I love Talisman.

WARHAMMER FANTASY ROLEPLAY 3RD EDITION

The brilliant Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 3rd Edition is now complete. There will be no further products in the line, so it's all out there now. And what a great role-playing system it is. I think the dice mechanic included in this game is one of the most brilliant storytelling devices I've ever seen. I've played many a role-playing game and seen a few descend into a bit of a boring trudge – even when the GM is trying to keep the game exciting and eventful. Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 3rd made sure this never happened by attaching symbols to dice results that forced players to justify, in a storytelling sense, what they were seeing in their rolls. It was never just "roll a certain number, score a critical hit" - the game's dice show you a breakdown of your result with every roll.

With the line complete, it's a good time to get out and pick this one up. It's a modern classic, in my opinion. I hope to be playing it for decades more.

X-COM: THE BOARD GAME

You'll have seen Graham talking about this.

It's an X-Com board game. Sure. From a great designer. Sure. And a great publisher of board games. Sure. And based on a great computer game. Sure.

Weirdly, I feel a bit nervous about it. I think it's something to do with that companion app it needs. It says it needs it. It's not just an optional thing to cut down on book-keeping. It's an essential and necessary thing. I feel weird about that.

Am I the only person to feel weird about it?

What happens in ten years time, when climate change has forced us all to live in subterranean tunnels? When we have no smart-phones or tablets, and no electricity, what then? Board games might be the only thing we have to keep us sane. And then, this rat mutant creature you've befriended says:

"SHALL WE PLAY skritch skritch THE X-COM BOARD GAME TONIGHT skritch?"

You'd have to tell Oskfoorta the Rat-King that we can't play bloody X-Com the bloody board game because you need a bloody app to play it. And he'll be all like "What's an app?" And you'll be all like "Never mind" and you'll have to massage his tail and milk him. That sounds awful.

Also also ALSO I kinda sorta play board games to get a break from digital crap.

I dunno. I'm an OLD MAN LEAVE ME ALONE.

X-WING MINIATURES GAME: SCUM AND VILLAINY

I love this game so much. It's such fun to play. You find yourself, I guarantee it, going BVEEEEOOOOOOO as you fly things around. Also: DVYEEEEOOWWWWW.

Well, joining the two factions of the Rebels (goodies) and the Empire (baddies) is the third faction – SCUM AND VILLAINY (tweeners). These are the bounty hunters, with re-paints of classic Star Wars ships in cool colours, and IG-88's ship and all sorts of cool stuff. You can even be Prince Xizor, the green guy with the daft ponytail from the Star Wars expanded universe stuff. Like... if you want to. Why would you want to? Oh, because his ship looks AMAZING.

Oh did I mention STAR WARS: ARMADA

The new board game of epic-scale fleet battles in the Star Wars universe? Jesus Christ.

Oh did I mention IMPERIAL ASSAULT

Which is pretty much a Star Wars version of the brilliant Descent? Oh yeah – I did. Sorry.

IT'S NOT JUST FANTASY FLIGHT GAMES
(although, my god, it sometimes seems to be)

Asmodee and Days of Wonder have merged – these two companies make BEAUTIFUL-LOOKING games, so this is kinda like if Charlize Theron and Ryan Gosling decided to make babies. We have some beautiful things to look forward to, for sure.

Plaid Hat Games' Dead of Winter is really close now, and word is that it's a really interesting design. A lot of paranoia and co-operation and backstabbing and FRIGHT.

Oh, and WE NOW KNOW WHAT KING OF NEW YORK IS

We all love King of Tokyo. We all own it, right? What? You better own it. And now we know what King of New York is. It's quite a different game, it seems. But still brilliant. That's what they're saying. Why not watch the great Tom Vasel and his buddies giving it an old-fashioned REVIEW?

NEXT TIME

I'm finally ready to pull the Kaosball trigger. See you next Tuesday to talk SPORTS.