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Anteria Decorating: The Settlers - Kingdoms Of Anteria

We built this city on rock 'n' coal

And so it has come to pass. Revelation chapter thirteen tells of the beast that rose from the sea, "upon his heads the name of blasphemy", and old blaspheme-bonce is followed by other portents of the end-times. The final chapters of Revelation introduce yet more incredible signs of doom, so incredible in fact that they have long been considered apocryphal. Take this excerpt from chapter 47: "Yea, from the mountain a rumbling, a crack in the firmament, a host cried out in anguish and looked upon the plummy terror of a third-person Settlers action game. Or maybe even a sodding MOBA." Can it be that we live in those times even now? A trailer for the newly announced Kingdoms Of Anteria caused me to tremble and gnash.

No. Wait. It's all OK, isn't it? This is just a very silly trailer that takes a while to look like a Settlers game. Phew. No need to adopt the brace position in the under-bunker just yet. In fact, maybe we're entering a land of milk and honey (and wood, stone, grain, iron ore etc) because I hear that the previous Settlers game was actually a bit of alright. I haven't played it but it's no exaggeration to say that the original is an unusual entry on my never-fully-realised list of favourite games.

It's a sedate and beautiful thing and now that I'm thinking about exactly how sedate and beautiful it is, I'm becoming a bit annoyed by all of those growling, snarling idiot monsters in the trailer up there. Maybe it is time to take shelter after all. Just to be safe.

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