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Getting lost by degrees in 0°N 0°W

Getting lost by degrees

I’m standing in Alice’s wheelhouse right now and it is daft. Half these things aren’t even wheels and I’m not sure a cabin filled with vaguely circular objects is where the expression comes from. I don’t know why she’s built this.

But look here. It’s one of those walking simulators she’s always telling us about. This one was released last week and is called 0°N 0°W (or Zero North Zero West, if you can’t stand degrees). It’s a “fantastical multidimensional walkabout through space and time”, say developers Colorfiction. Well, I’ll be the judge of that. Let’s go for a dander.

Okay, we’re outside a petrol station.

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That’s good. That’s where every good dander begins. But what’s that down the road? Ah, a cinema.

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Let’s go see what’s OH MY GOD I’VE BEEN ABSORBED.

That’s fine. We expected this. Let’s go through one of the doors. Bloop.

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Ah yes, a creamy pink spiral staircase. And the sound of waves, the ocean. We’re on an island. But this island also has a TV and some sofas. Let’s change the channel on the oh yes I see.

It’s a wobbly, whirring conflagration of clicks and warbles, hmm yes, a spirographical summation of the early internet… is what I would say if I were an art critic! Ha ha ha! But I’m a games journalist. It’s obvious this is just where the graphics live. Onward, through another door.

I’m in a neon swamp. I don’t like it. Next!

Now I’m falling through a garish gridsky. It hurts to look around. But finally…

Now this is my kind of foreign dimension. It’s got a dining table, a bed, a bathroom, a big library. It’s even got a PC, not to mention an enviable view of the city. Is it possible this "city" is actually a spittle-built hive constructed by monstrous extradimensional warpbeasts? Yes, it’s possible. Possible. But look at the high ceilings.

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Yes, I think I’ll stay here. There’s more sliding to be done and more audiovisual fireworks to see, but I’m happy in my new house. I can file articles from the computer and get Tesco to deliver. If you want to come and sit around my dining table, 0°N 0°W is on Steam for £7.19/$9.99.

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About the Author

Brendan Caldwell avatar

Brendan Caldwell

List Goblin

Brendan likes all types of games. To him there is wisdom in Crusader Kings 2, valour in Dark Souls, and tragicomedy in Nidhogg.

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